weaning a baby uniterested in milk or solids....

hi ladies, I'm just wondering if anyone has had experience of this or can offer some advice.

My little boy will be 26 weeks next week and I know we need to attempt to start weaning. The problem is he has always been a dreadful feeder. He was in hospital for 2 seperate weeks between 8 and 12 weeks as he would scream, arch his back whilst bottle feed (or as soon as you laid him in feeding position) and basically refuse. After many treatments for reflux and hypoallergenic milk failed, we were left to get on with it and basically his given up on by doctors and told his feeding probs are behavioural. This meant for nearly 3 months i had to do what is called 'sleep feed' - he would only take formula when half asleep (this was not same as dream feeding). It was a terribly stressful time - hence his weight gain has not been good as would only take 3oz about 5 times a day. Thankfully he seems to be growing out of this as will now let us feed him in his bouncy chair but we often have to use something to distract him to get him to keep eating (he takes much less than the recommended formula still and is on a special dense milk and under care of a dietician). My worry is that I tried puree weaning on advice from HV at 17 weeks, but after a week of doing well, he stopped opening his mouth for the spoon and I felt I was forcing it in, so we stopped becasue I didn't want same problems with solids. Now he's getting to be 6 months I worry as he shows little interest in food still. I'm hoping to go BLW as hopefully if he has control he will take to it more but I just don't feel the interest is there as he still has little interest in milk.

We eat infront of him as much as possible and he sits in his bumbo on the floor with us whilst we eat tea. Any food I put infront of him gets brushed onto the floor or if he does put it in his mouth he just spits it out. He does put toys/hands in his mouth though.

Has anyone come across this before and had success?

When you do BLW do they often just play and squish the food about before actually eating?

It's just so hard as for the past 6 months I've read about how much milk everyone else's baby is guzzling and now they are gulping down whole jars of food and my boy is still barely taking what a 2 month old would and even then he needs coercing into doing that

PS my HV are rubbish so that's a no go!!

Many thanks

Suz and Josh :? :roll:


  • Aaw Suz, you poor thing! Freddie is similar in that for a while he refused to open his mouth for food, or if i did get it in (usually by making him laugh and opening his mouth!) he would hold it there for a while and then spit it out. I also started weaning on hv advice as he was messing about so much with his bottles - biting the teat, spitting it out, arching his back and crying and would only drink if i distracted him with a book or something.

    However today we finally had some success! For the last few days i have put the spoon in his mouth and held it there, slightly raised at the end and he kind of sucked the food off the spoon and it was as though something clicked and he understood, then today it was mouth open, in, swallow, mouth open!

    I guess it just takes a while for them to 'get it' although Joshies problems are obviously much more serious than Freddies but over the last few days he hasnt messed with his bottle either??

    Hope someone can help you hun x x x
  • after I started Lady T on baby rice, she had two days of not opening her mouth and actually crying to get down from her high chair (and she LOVES her high chair! - has a steering wheel on it etc, lol!) I really panicked (and you know why!) and was crying etc that she wouldn't take milk and now she wouldn't wean. Anyway, we started sitting her up in her high chair with a plate of food in front of her, and just ignoring it, but eating the same food. Eventually she started putting her fingers in it, then getting annoyed, then sucking the purees off my fingers. Then, we gave her a spoon a few times a day just as a toy but unrelated to food, and she had a wee go at playing with it, putting it in her mouth etc - eventually we were able to get a few spoons of food down her at teatime (but NOT rice - Heinz creamy oat porridge only!) - then I started singing wee songs and giggling during mealtimes, not making a fuss at all or even expecting her to fully open her mouth for the spoon, just letting her chew/suck on it with a teeny bit of puree on it. Eventually, like Niene's wee one, she just seemed to twig and will now open her mouth (although more for some things than others, wee monkey!). She is taking quite big lunch and dinner now so that whole process to get there took about 5 weeks, and I just made the decision that although I would NEVER force the issue or make it tense (I SO appreciate your advice on that from the milk problems, it made such a difference to us when I listened to you about backing off) that I would offer the food regardless at the same time every day. I talk to DH about unrelated things and sing her fave nursery rhymes etc while feeding and just very business like put the spoon to her lips. I give her water every few spoons, and I also bring the plate right up to her chin sometimes and she examines the food closely (you know how she does that with things, lol!) and then sticks her tongue out. I have no doubt she'll go through bad phases too, but I will just have to persevere.

    Since doing it, she is more interested in our food than she used to be, and we are starting to do bits of BLW too she is eating tiny corners of toasted cheese etc and her afternoon feed is now a snack of banana pieces etc with some follow on milk in a sippy cup.

    As a point of interest, I am trying her on Hipp Organic follow on milk atm from Aptimal First, and she LOVES it. Maybe they get p'd off sometimes with the taste of the milk?!
  • If you get any answers please let me know. Charlie is nearly 4 months but is fed by a tube and has very severe oral adversion. We have been referred to the local SALT (speech and language terapy) team but nothing has happened yet. I'm expecting to be advised to wean early because of his severe reflux so am doing things like having him on my lap when I'm eating in order for him to see people eating but I'm very worried about the whole thing. At the moment he can't even swallow a mouthful of milk, it just dribbles out the side.

    Abby (2 yrs), on the other hand, is an excellent eater and I put that down to her never being forced or coerced into eating anything. If she just wants to eat chips one meal we let her as we know she will eat extra vegetables the next day. I'm hoping Charlie will pick up a relaxed attitude to food from her.

    H xx
  • thanks for the replies ladies. We are starting to share a petit filou at lunch time (he took 5 spoons whilst watching mickey mouse club house!) so I guess the fact that he does actually take some is better tan just spitting it out. I went shopping today and bought some white bread for toast and rice cakes so he has something else to chew/explore. I was reading another forum about slow to wean/BLW babies and takes a while to 'get it' or show interest so felt a bit better.

    He was watching my eat a pizza last night with interest so I let him have a bit of the tomato sacue off my finger and he loved it!! I'm a bad mummy - he's had chocolate, pizza and yoghurt so far!!

    Interesting that other have had the lack of mouth opening and fussing - maybe I'll give it another go in a few weeks, just scared incase it turns into aversion.

    Blondefriend - I can empathise with your situation - they were talking of an NG tube for Josh when he was in hospital and screaming whilst fighting off bottle. Luckily we have kinda of turned him around although far from perfect still. I'd be happy to chat/email more if you wished. I hope you have found websites like littlerefluxers as there are other mums with tube fed babies on there. I am also part of a facebook support group for mums of reflux babies and also have lots of good links to similar sites with people with problems.
  • my daughter is pretty uninterested in food. She will take yoghurt so i give her plain yoghurt mixed with fruit puree so i at least feel happy that she's taking some fruit. She loves being praised and sang to so mealtimes I switch on full time mummy entertainer and sing, squeal, praise in a high pitched voice for as long as it takes to get food in her. She tolerates it but doesnt enjoy it. She got better last month but then got poorly over christmas and we are back to square one with it all. x

    My LO is 16 months now but I could have written your post at 6 months. It's so hard and I think people who haven't experienced this can never fully understand what it's like. My LO barely drank anything, and even the small amount she took was such a struggle. She'd drink fine in the night though when she was sleepy. It was hell. No one else had a similar problem and HV etc was useless. We were advised to wean at 17 weeks but felt it was bad advice and held out to 24 weeks. She didn't get diagnosed with SR until 23 weeks when I switched to formula and they couldn't fob me off with 'oh it must be your flow/supply etc' anymore. By then she truly related feeding with pain.

    I won't lie, weaning was a nightmare. We did a mix of purees and finger foods. We had to do A LOT of persuading to eat. Making her laugh and quickly shoving a spoon in. Was awful and I didn't know what to do. BUT at about 10 months something just clicked.

    I think she finally 'got' finger foods, and by that age was able to eat more interesting things so it had more appeal. She's still a very fussy eater. Won't eat any veg, will only eat what she likes best. Won't eat anything wet and lumpy like bolognese. Everything has to be quite dry and bite-able. Like chicken pieces, waffles, toast, cheese etc. But it's soooooo much better than it was and I don't feel as stressed about it anymore.

    He will get there. My main advice is to try to make feeding fun. My LO hated the highchair at first so we would let her eat on the floor and made it into a litle floor picnic event so it was fun to eat. And we make a massive fuss when she eats well, but try to ignore her when she starts throwing things. Also try to eat the same as him. Sometimes my LO won't eat something but if I take a bite of it she will then want it! hehehe!

    A lot of people struggle with weaning, even if they had really good milk drinkers. It must be so new and bizarre to them. But it will come. It might be that he's fussy like mine, but you will work out what he likes to eat and he won't starve himself.

    Email me if you want to talk about this more.

  • Ethan only really got interested in food - taking off a spoon or feeding himself - at about 7.5 months. I'm usually so laid back I'm comatose when it comes to feeding issues and I'd never been worked up about his milk feeds - he was 90% BF till 6 months but when he took a bottle he'd only take an average of 5oz. But he just couldn't be arsed with food, ate tiny amounts, reluctantly, and point blank refused to pick anything up and put it in his mouth despite lunging for food on our plates when he was smaller. Oh, and he point blank refused any form of breakfast and only a mouthful for lunch, dinner was the only meal he'd really entertain.

    Then at 7.5 months it all just suddenly clicked and he started eating 3 meals a day plus snacks, feeding himself, and eating anything put in front of him. So you may find that going gently and just offering little amounts and not pressuring your LO will mean than in a month or so he will do exactly the same.

    Little buggers just like to wind us up I think.
  • thanks for the advice, especially Baby_buk - like you say it's hard. people just laughed at me and said he was being awkard, he doesn't like milk etc and 'he will eat when he's hungry'. My blood would boil becasue - actually no he wasn't being difficult and NO! he wouldn't eat when hungry becasue he was scared to eat, I have seen him take 4oz in 24 hrs and couldn't care less if he had more or not. Like you say, until someone has actually been through this they can't understand. It is constant, several times a day and nihgt every day of the week..... no fun for any of us. image

    Anyway as for the weaning - I expect it will be hard work - he's a beautiful boy but he sure makes me work hard for it! I shall be going back to work in April, he will be nearly 9 months and he will be in nursery a few days a week so I'm hoping something will click then when he see's other babies eating. Until then I shall persevere with sharing my food, sitting him with us and next week when he's 6 months I shall have another go a weaning with a mix of puree and finger foods (whatever he will eat basically!). oh and turn into mummy the entertainer again!!!

    Thanks for the advice. I'm part of a FB group which is pretty newly set up and have made contact with another lady through a friend who is currently going through hell sleep feeding so it's nice to give a bit of support having began to emerge through the other side. If anyone wishes to join or work with me to offer as much support to others please feel free to get intouch.

    Suz x
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