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What's going wrong?? Please help!

My daughter is 5 weeks old, and was born at 34 weeks. We managed to bf quite quickly, and it was going really well, and she was such a contented baby, never crying. A couple of weeks ago she started getting very windy, and I have started giving infacol. Feeding has started going down hill, and I am now at my wits end! BF is on demand and happens alot as Madelyn falls asleep straight away, including through the night. It is geting worse and more often, and I am only getting a couple of hours sleep a night! Madelyn is quite a noisy baby, with strange machine gun like noises, pulling up her legs and can never get into a proper sleep, making her think she is hungry again and not settling. It seems to go: nappy change, feed, wind, into bed, wind, feed, wind, nappy change, wind, into bed, feed.... and keeps going and going! I am exhausted, and feel like giving formula at night so I can sleep, but will that make the wind worse? Also, I dont really want to give her formula but I am starting to burst into tears all night which isnt good for her. Does anyone know what these noises are? She makes them even when there shouldnt be any wind there. Also, due to being bf, she poo's all the time and all the nappy changes wake her up and starts off the cycle again. I know that formula feeding reduces the frequency so feel that might help her too, but I love bf'ing and want to do whats best for my baby!



Please, has anyone been here? Can anyone give me some advice? My confidence is plumeting and I feel like a failure as a mother.

Replies

  • Hey hun, doesn't sound like anythings wrong with regards to the frequency - at 5 weeks she's about to hit a major growth spurt so it's perfectly normal for her to feed pretty much constantly. Obviously if she's feeding alot you will have to wind her alot too but be reassured that she just wants mummy and her boobies round the clock for a while and enjoy the snuggles! She will also need changing through the night for a few more weeks yet, all perfectly normal. She'll grow out of the night time poos in her own time, don't feel like you're failing her, quite the opposite if you're BF on demand. It's bloody hard work!! x
  • hi just wqanted to say yr doing great , i bf my two boys for 3 years each . it is hard work but it should settle , i found a cherry dummy helps as bf babies like these ones if it gives u a few more hours sleep thats a happy mummy and a happy baby and as for wind the babay maybe isnt lached on properly as they dont normally get wind when bf, i only bf my little girl for 6 wks as she had heart problem and couldnt cope with the breast and had to give formula , but i dont feel any less bonded to her than my boys u can only do ur best , hope this helps xx
  • Sometimes she feeds really well and latches on really well, but alot of the time I look at her and think she's not latched properly. I need to go to the bf support group at the gp's but cant drive until next week due to c-section! HV yesterday asked about nights and I said they were getting a little worse, and she said that we should be in a pattern by now - which made me feel bad and I felt too stupid to ask her advice.

    I have tried a TT closer to nature dummy, but she wont have it.

    I watched the bf documentary last night and it made me so determined to keep going as long as possible. It looks so easy once baby can get on themselves - I have to hold back my boob as they are quite large and always smother her which means I am under pressure to stay very alert.



    Thank you for your advice, it is very much appreciated x
  • What a load of crap, pattern my ar*e at 5 weeks old!! Just keep going hun, you're doing fab - perhaps try ringing a breast feeding support line for advice if you can't get out to a group. NCT do one x
  • My daughter is almost 12wks now and coming out the end of her colic - I hope!!! My son had it til he was 16wks. I bf my daughter and my son was too so it's a bit of a myth that only ff babies can suffer from wind. So dont feel like a failure because you bf and your baby is suffering from it - it's their digestive system that needs to grow and nothing to do with your milk of you as a mother. Colic normally sets in at around 3wks (though not true in all cases - my son had it from the beginning) and this is when my daughter started it after being the best burper id ever heard for the first 3 wks. She was like your daughter, very content and rarely cried.

    It is hard to get into any type of pattern if your baby suffers from wind (or reflux I might add!) so dont pressure yourself until it disappears around 12wks. You will learn how to better manage her wind - try all the tools available (gripe water, infacol, colief, different winding techniques). I dont need to anymore but in the early days I propped my daugher up on her side to go to sleep using rolled up cotton blankets (kept down away from her face). It's more painful for them on their back. I also find that as soon as she stops feeding I need to immediately put her up over my shoulder to burp her straight away otherwise there is more chance of the wind becoming stuck. Even if you do this mid feed it helps. The poos in the night will definately ease up or stop altogether soon. There is a light at the end of the tunnel so keep going. We too were at around 5wks and going through the same as you - it was a 2hr cycle in the night to complete a feed/wind/put back down and it was then almost time to start over! But Ive lived to tell the tale that it gets better and so will you.

    Try to persevere with getting her to take a dummy. My daughter point blank refused it for weeks but I kept trying and finally she did. It helps her settle and it's also good for colicky babies to bring their wind up apparently. We use the Nuk ones.

    Keep going hon, you have just hit a really tough point where colic escalates at around 6wks before it starts to ease up again. Take one day at a time and try not to let it consume you - have some support around you. In a matter of weeks you will be looking back on this and your daughter will be happily bf from you without all these problems.

  • Aww hun, I really feel for you! I got told in hospital not to wind my little girl as breast fed babies don't get wind - what a load of crap! Infacol made her worse and she was sick all the time. Good old fashioned gripe water worked a charm for us and we still use it now as she struggles to get her wind up on her own.



    At 5 weeks you just need to take it as it comes, MW's make me laugh, when my LO was newborn they were trying to get me to wake her to feed every 3 hours and I had to ask them to define the term breast feeding ON DEMAND... We settled into a nice pattern aboout 7-8 weeks ish. With the frequent pooping it is totally normal, formula is harder to digest and can make a baby constipated so you may find if you were to give her formula she might poo less but grumble more with tummy ache, it's all swings and roundabouts really and you've just got to do what feels right to you. Oh and the dummy, my LO would only take the ones that are flat on one side not sure if they're the ones you've tried or not x
  • Some lovely, wonderfully supportive comments, thank you so much. Madelyn possetts quite alot, through her nose mainly, but more lately through her mouth too. Her breathe smells very acidic, so think she may have a touch of silent reflux? I am going to speak to GP on Wed at the 6 week check. I will keep going with the dummy, as I fully intended to use them and will persevere til she likes it. They have lots of benefits if used appropriately.



    Thank you all again, I am feeling more positive as we head into another night....... image
  • Hi,



    Do you have a lot of milk, or suffer from forceful let down? Freya is 6 weeks on saturday and we were having alot of the same problems as you. What colour is your daughters poo? I went to the health visitor and she suggested Freya was lactose intolerant and for me to cut out dairy and try colief. I contacted the bf counseller from our nct classes as i felt dubious about he hv advice. She said that Freya is taking in air when she feeds, and was able to suggest some solutions. A week on and things are much improved without any need for colief, infacol etc... except on two occassion to shift some really stubborn wind.



    xx
  • My let down happens very quickly and the flow is very fast at the start I think, as she often gets that wide eyed look and milk spills out between boob and mouth. It seems to slow down after a while as she looks calm and relaxed with the speed of my flow. Madelyns poo is either yellow or green x
  • I had a very fast flow too, but never made the connection... LO was also pretty sicky too and I suspected reflux but after we started with the Gripe Water everything improved loads. Also see if you can do baby massage, this can help lots with wind, if you do before bed it might help her through the night, and is relaxing for her anyway.



    With the dummy , my LO wouldn't take one for ages. She used to play with the end of it (the same way she did with my nipple which was why I was giving her one) but after a few days of me holding the dum to her mouth while she played with it she did start taking it properly. She's 6 months now and only really has it for nap time and once in the night unless she's poorly. Hope things are getting easier for you x
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