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9 week old and crying...

Hi,



My little girl is 10 weeks tomorrow and is crying lots in the day and doesn't seem settled to play like other babies her age.



She sleeps brilliantly generally and will usually sleep from 7pm until 4am, feed then go back down until 7:30am. She then wakes for feed and nappy change and a good kick under playgym, then naps at 8:30am for 45mins-1 hour, can't get her to stay awake for any longer. Then she wakes and i feed her, dress her and a short play or read story, but then she is tired again only an hour from waking, so another 45-1hr nap.



This is then when her day goes a bit up and down, when she wakes from this one, she just doesn't seem to know what she wants. And is grizzly on and off. I do usually get out with her in the afternoons to either baby groups, friends houses or walks but this is where i have started finding it stressful. She is always the baby to be crying at the group and is never content to lay on mat and play even tho babies younger than her can be. We went to baby massage today and she screamed throughout it and wasnt having any of it, so disheartening! Do you think i'm overstimulating her perhaps? Im thinking of trying a day indoors tomo to see if i stay at home and concentrate on her naps she'll be happer maybe? What do you think?



What sort of routine would you recommend for a 10 week old? Arghhhhhh, this is so hard!



Thanks for any help u can offer x

Replies

  • hi wispa!



    we used to chat in ttc, congrats on your little girl! My DS is 6 and a half months now - the time has flown.



    Sorry to g/c and not a lot of advice to give you im afraid - my LO never napped at all from 8 weeks onwards, he would just have long BFs where he snoozed and fed, snoozed and fed on me but he slept pretty well at night like your LO and never felt it made him act really tired so i went with it. I do remember though from the 8 week point being shocked that he was suddenly awake all day (he had previously slept most of the time!)



    i struggled to know how to occupy and stimulate him as they just arent really interested in toys - he spent a lot of time feeding, we used our play gym a lot, and he spent hours next to a warm heater completely naked on a towel kicking - he loved this! As of the 12 week mark you can start thinking bumbo, door swingers etc but we couldnt for sometime as ds had a neck injury at birth that meant his head control was delayed - so he spent lots more time on his mat nappyless! These days its more difficult as he rolls over!



    I know none of the above really helps with your LO crying whilst you're out - all i can really suggest is a dummy as this was a godsend for us in those situations - especially as my LO immediately wanted a BF whenever slightly upset, which isnt doable in the middle of asda, etc. I do think lots of babies get overtired due to mums getting out a lot, maybe a quiet day is called for where she can chill with her mummy.



    Sorry not much else to suggest, just wanted to say hello x
  • I was the mum with the screaming baby too. All of the other babies lay nicely and coo'd at their mummies. I would stand and rock my daughter desperately trying to stop her from crying! I always felt like everyone was judging me because my baby was so distressed all of the time! My daughter had colic so it was the tummy pain that was causing her to cry. She was constipated and struggled to pass the green poops that come with colic. We discovered it was caused by a sensitivity to lactose and used Colief to help. It was a miracle worker for us.



    The one thing I will say is your daughter wanting to go to sleep after an hour of waking time is normal, and should be encouraged. About an hour of awake time is all they can manage at that age and if she is sleeping well at night then do not worry about the naps she takes during the day. She may well be getting overstimulated by the new environment so seeing what she does if you stay at home is a good idea. One of the things I used to do with my daughter when she got grizzly is lay her on the play mat or bouncy chair, put a cd on and sing to her. Always seemed to calm her down.



    The routine I would recommend is Eat, Activity, Sleep. Keep your eye on the clock so that you are feeding her at regular intervals - every 3 or 4 hours. (I personally found that my dd settled better when fed every 3 hours.) After she has had her bottle, change her and give her some playmat time. If she is grizzly try putting her into her bouncy chair and singing. Then after she has been awake for an hour put her down to nap. Once you have mastered the routine getting out will be easier. I found that teaching my daughter to sleep in her pushchair meant that she would go to sleep in the pushchair when we were out because it was familiar.



    Good luck, but you are not alone! All I can say is that someone told me when I was struggling that grizzly babies are usually bright because the reason they grizzle is because they are frustrated at not being able to do anything. I dont know if it is true or not, but the thought that I might be raising a mini Einstein made it slightly easier to bear! Now she is 7 months and can crawl and stand up against the furniture she is much more content and toys do stimulate her more. Not for long, because she always wants to be in to something else, but it is easier to figure out what she wants. It will get better! xx
  • Thank you so much both of you for your replies



    Alfie, thanks for the congrats, she is amazing and we're loving it, apart from the crying that is! hehe. My DD is the opposite to your DS in the fact that she needs lots of sleep in the day. I think thats why whenever we get to groups she's tired again so doesn't manage to enjoy it. We've been using a dummy and like you said, it def is a lifesaver at times image



    Glitterbug, really appreciate your reply, so nice to hear from someone who's been there. I feel exactly the same about the other babies coo'ing at their parents and im standing rocking DD and feeling like i should leave the room cos no one can hear each other (especially at baby massage where its meant to be relaxing!)

    Is the eat,activity, sleep routine the baby whisperer? The problem i have is that my DD wants to feed 2 hourly mostly so i don't get much time inbetween to do anything with her. She seems to be waking, feeding for 20 mins approx then 30-40mins of awake time max but she can get grizzly 20mins later then she wants to sleep for 45mins approx. Should i try and make her nap for longer stretches or just go with her short cycles?

    I've had my day at home today and so far she's screamed even more than normal which has confused me, altho the last waking period she was a bit more settled and i had a few smiles.

    Thanks again for your help. Glad you are getting more enjoyment and freedom now image and you're right, she must be a baby Einstein def!!



    xx
  • Yep the baby whisperer uses E.A.T, however it seems to be quite a common routine that many of the specialists recommend. I have read every article on how to settle a grumpy baby going!! If she is feeding every two hours then really do not worry about getting an activity in. At her age she doesn't need much stimulation, just you talking to her whilst changing her bum is plenty. You could try getting her to nap a little longer, The baby whisperer recommends patting them gently on the tummy and shushing them as they start to stir to get them back to sleep. Is there any chance she might be starting to teethe already? If you think she might be Dentinox do a gel that is suitable from birth. My daughter cut two teeth at 4 months, but the teething process started at about 11 weeks! Otherwise, the only thing I can promise is it will get better. I found that when I weaned my daughter and she was more satisfied she settled a little more too. Admittedly I did wean at 4 months which is against current guidelines, but she was ready for food having never really taken much milk. Let us know how you get on xx
  • hope glitterbug's advice works for you wispa. It must be very wearing. Everybody used to ask me if DS got tired, and i used to think, i dont know what the signs are. He used to have a feed and come back rejuvinated, he honestly seemed ok although i know its rare for a baby so young to stay awake all that time in the day. I tried my best to put him down as i worried he was missing important sleep time but he just got upset and i stopped worrying about it, he seemed fine with a little power nap on my knee post feed. However, he did spend half his days on the breast at times and i think this was relaxing for him!



    Its only since he's been rolling over and more mobile that he does get tired - grumpy, agitated, rubbing his face, whinging no matter what you do to cheer him up - so now i realise what a tired baby is like! And he does nap now - i try and put him down after his mid morn feed and his mid afternoon as i know these are the times he'll sleep - and lately he will sleep after one of them usually. The time to do things is such a luxury!



    Hang in there, sounds like things are tough for you. So glad you had a lovely healthy baby - seems ages ago i saw you had your BFP x
  • just wanted to say congrats on your little one!!!



    our DD was a cryer and still is, all eyes on us at swimming this morning :lol:



    they get better!!!
  • Hi Wispa



    My dd is 10 weeks today &has been going through exactly the same thing. I bought a 2nd hand baby whispered book & I must say things have definitely improved. We've only been doing it a week but before that she wouldn't nap on her own & always had to be held. Now she has at least 3 naps a day. Definitely worth a look at. Probably a good idea to get her used to napping in the pushchair as well. That's the problem I'm now having, she only naps in her cot!



    Good luck, GP x
  • i have a routine for sam and follow eat activity sleep and feed without fail



    7am



    10am



    1pm



    4pm



    6pm - only 2 oz

    bedtime routine

    6.45pm finis botttle

    7pm



    sleep



    i have a document that i can send to you that i paid for a sleep expert to do. pm me your email and i will send it to you. x x x
  • Sorry said you did it's ok image 

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