i feel so guilty!

Hiya Girlies

Don't know why i feel like this really but just feel so bad.

What it is is i have such a fear of needles i can't bare even watching them be done and because of this i left Grace's pretty late. She's 6 month now and only just had her last set (the ones with 3 injections). I would have never let her go without them but i just kept leaving it and not taking her and i feel so bad that i didn't do it at the times she was suppose to have them. She's had them all now but to think through me and my phobia of needles, she could have been ill! image

Luckily what i did this time and last time was asked someone on reception to hold her while she had them and pass her straight back to me for comfort after (i was there all the time though, just couldn't hold her leg knowing what they were doing). I feel a failure for not being able to hold her whie she has them but i'm there straight after for the comforting cuddle.

Main reason for this post was that i feel evil for leaving her so long and not going and getting it done when she was due.

At least she's safe now and doesn't need anymore until she's 1. Thank god!

Thanks for listening and being there as always

Lisa xxx


  • As you say at least she's had them now!
    Good idea letting someone else hold her but I would say unless you can hide your fear perhaps you should stay out of sight too!!!
    Last thing you want is to pass your fear on.
    Well done going though- some ladies I know won't even go to the surgery!
  • oh Lisa, you poor little mum!!

    dont worry about the delay -as you say, she has had them - my last lo was 6 months old, before her last lot, as she had been ill nearly every time she should have had them!

    our surgery send out forms for us to complete so that if you cant take them, you give someone else your consent to sign on your behalf for them (if you could send your mum or something)

    hope you feel better - you have probably been more help to her by not holding her so she didnt pick up on your feelings

  • I totally agree on them not seeing the worry in my face and tend to just keep my eye on their face and smile and talk to them. I don't know why i panic so much because i'm fine having them, i just can't look at them without cringing. When it comes to my babies though, i just can't handle it and feel in a way that i should be protecting them from the pain but obviously i'm protecting them from worse for making sure they have them.

    At least she's done now until she's 1 so i can try and train myself to stay calm. lol

    Lisa xxx
  • lol yeah. I confused a few people with saying her speed in the walker and only having her last set of jabs today. Everyone thought i had some kind of superbaby (she is to me anyway lol).

    If i'd not left it so long she would have been done beginning of january but because of my stupid fear she was late.

    I was fine before having Ethan but the reaction he had after his first put me off them and then i just didn't like taking them from then on.

    I can't complain too much though when i can happily go and have a tattoo. Think its just seeing my babies that turns me into a wreck

    Lisa xxx
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