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dicipline
hey, probs better suited to toddler forum but it's quiet in there.
Evie has started to turn naughty, in a sense that when frustrated she will lash out and hit/bite/scratch people. She has also started to throw and kick her toys, sometimes she seems to be doing it for attention, even if she already has my attention and i am playing with her.
When she's doing these things, i get down to her level, ask her to look at me, then sternly but quietly tell her that it's wrong and ask her to stop... if she does it again i've been removing her from what she's doing, taking her else where and making her sit just for a minute if that, then asking her to apologise, she can't yet say sorry but strokes my face and voluntarily gives me a kiss/cuddle. Thing is, she seems to play nicely for 5mins after that then start to do it again. I'm trying not to tell her off every single time she throws something, and just ignoring her and trying to divert her attention instead otherwise we'd constantly be at war with each other!
I don't really feel confident about what i'm doing to combat the bad behaviour, it's not as though she's naughty all the time, but i don't want her thinking i'm playing games or that i'm too soft! what do you all do? should i continue what i'm already doing??
xx
Evie has started to turn naughty, in a sense that when frustrated she will lash out and hit/bite/scratch people. She has also started to throw and kick her toys, sometimes she seems to be doing it for attention, even if she already has my attention and i am playing with her.
When she's doing these things, i get down to her level, ask her to look at me, then sternly but quietly tell her that it's wrong and ask her to stop... if she does it again i've been removing her from what she's doing, taking her else where and making her sit just for a minute if that, then asking her to apologise, she can't yet say sorry but strokes my face and voluntarily gives me a kiss/cuddle. Thing is, she seems to play nicely for 5mins after that then start to do it again. I'm trying not to tell her off every single time she throws something, and just ignoring her and trying to divert her attention instead otherwise we'd constantly be at war with each other!
I don't really feel confident about what i'm doing to combat the bad behaviour, it's not as though she's naughty all the time, but i don't want her thinking i'm playing games or that i'm too soft! what do you all do? should i continue what i'm already doing??
xx
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Replies
it definately sounds like your doing the right thing, even if it feels like your ding it too much,
You need to set boundaries for the bahaviour you expect and as long as you are consistent with it then it will work. Children like boundaries, it makes them feel safe, they will try to push the boundaries but will feel safe and happy that they are there.
The other thing you can do is give tons of praise for good things - try to spot and praise good behaaviour during the day to give praise for, even if it for the smallest of things, you will feel happier for giving praise and your lo should then do more good things for positive reactions and attention.
Although she's young you could still use the word 'warning'. When you get down to her level and tell her why what she's doing is wrong, say this is your arning, if you di it again you will have to sit . . for 1 minute.
You are doing the right thing so try to feel confident, Evie will sense that you mean it if you are confident.
It' lovely that she gives you a ciddle as she knows that what she is doing is wrong which can be a battle in itself sometimes!!
Oh, and if you want to ignore some of her behaviour, decide what you will and wont tolerate so you are ignoring and disciplining the same things all the time as otherwise she will gt confused. Sticj to 1 or 2 things to discipline to begin with then incease it as she stops doing the initial things.
hope i've made sense, not rambled too much and helped!
Remember - babies/children actually like boundaries, it akes them feel safe so you are doing the right thing so feel condifent about it!!!
Lisa
it does seeem to work eventually...yesterday he went in the corner about 5 times before he stopped climbing on the sofa to get at my laptop!!!
Definately agree with the positive behaviour praise, I tell him he;s a clever boy or a good boy all the time - gonna have such an ego problem when eh's older lol. Seriously though - I think thats a good thing to do, Also, if he does stop doing something I've told him to stop doing he gets praise - not clever boy, but I say thankyou, well done. I'm not praising him for stopping misbehaving but I will tell him he's done well for obeying.
I think a lot of it at this age is frustration -certainly for cole when he can't do stuff he's trying to do (15 minutes trying to put on his slipper and huge paddies because he couldn't manage it lol!) but if we don't start discouraging bad habits like throwing stuff it'll only get harder when theya re older.
Sounds like we are all on the right track