I feel terrible!

For the first time EVER i have just let Oscar cry himself to sleep for his lunchtime nap.

He's 4 months and we've been having trouble getting him to sleep during the day, and waking during the night because he is a snacky eater, and he fights sleep like a champion.

Yesterday someone gave me Gina Ford's contented little sleeper book and i read it all in one afternoon lol. Although i think she is strict and i'm not a fan of strict set in stone routines (because a lot of evenings we are out at relatives and i want Oscar to not have to rely on a routine to go to sleep) a lot of it did make sense to me. So overnight we did her core plan (not feeding Oscar everytime he wakes up because i know he's capable of going from his last feed at 11 until 7am, and he grumbled a bit but did sleep until 7.30am. when i woke him to get our day started (normally i would let him sleep till he wanted, normally about 9).

So i am making sure his feeds are stretched out to every 3/4 hours (he usually snacks every 2) and have just put him down to sleep swaddled in his cot and he cried and cried and cried for 10 minutes and then just stopped. I would usually be in and out and picking him up until he dropped off. I feel awful that i let him cry and i'm worried he makde himself poorly and choked and thats why he suddenly stopped (silly i know) but i dont want to go in a check him in case he actually did go to sleep and i disturb him!

Please reassure me that i'm not awful for letting him cry and it will get better! :cry:


  • Oh babe well done for staying strong and doing the best for your lo I know how horrible it is. You are so not awful and you know when to go in if he sounds destressed so he will be fine.
    We tried it when Alf was probably the same age and it took a lot for me not to run upstairs and pick himup. Took a few days and he got the hang of it that it was safe in his cot and he didn't need me to help him settle. Havingsaid that he's fought sleep for the last 6 hours today and cried which he never does so I'm hoping it's just a growth spurt!
    I would still pop your head in though. Am off to check on Alf now. Well done and good luck x
  • Hun, he's fine and it will get better!! Give him 15mins to make sure he is asleep and then go and peep round the door, I bet he is fast asleep and looking very peaceful. I had to do exactly the same thing with Barney as he just would not sleep during the day, even if I sat and cuddled him. He put up a lot more of a fight!! 30 mins screaming was quite normal for him. Some babies do need to cry a bit before going to sleep, aparantly it is their way of reliving stress and tension. Barney has all his naps in his cot now and he often still crys for a minute or two befor stopping, gurgling for a bit and then going to sleep.
  • I popped my head round the door, he is fine, like you all said! Sleeping away, not sure for how long though, he doesnt usually last more than half an hour.

    Next step... no more swaddling, yikes x
  • Hi,

    Its tough but you will be glad in the long run. We had to go back to cc after a rough few weeks with teething and she took to it again very quickly. Ella has a cry/ winge everytime she goes to bed for around 5 mins but soon settles herself. Ella is now 10.5months and we ask her if she wants to go to bed. She normally nods her head and says yeah. I feel bad sometimes and found it really hard to start with but you have to keep at it.

    Don't feel bad for doing it, they have to learn to go to sleep themselves.
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