My LO is now 1month old & i've just about managed to put the birth/labour to the back of my mind! Mine wasn't particularly straight forward either (won't go into details..take too long!!), but i had to have an episiostomy (sp) which seem to go from one end to the other if you catch my drift! As i've read looking is not for everyone, but it seemed to help me come to terms a bit more and i was convinced it wasn't healing properly, so ensured a m/w checked & from that was prescribed anti-biotics as there was a slight infection.
I was also vv tearful about the whole thing - some happy tears, some sad tears. My Hubby & mum literally had to force me to go out - i jsut couldn't bare to leave ds behind & i felt like a big fat frump - v depressed about it. HOWEVER, a month down the line i'm feeling much better about everything...have healed down there well, my piles are all but gone (didn't want to use cream as thought it would interfere with cut)! Still can't fit into any of my pre-pregnancy clothes, but have made plans to join Slimming World (I've done this diet b4) & do some exercise - poss pole dancing, i'm game for trying something diff and hopefully get back into horse riding which i love (although that might be a bit longer away for obvious reasons)!!!
Anyways, many congrats to you & Oh on the arrival of Charlie! Sarah xx
I think my OH doesn't really understand why I can have such a tramatic labour and barely shed a tear.. but be so tearful now.. clinging on to the hope it'll get better soon.. xx
it-must-be-love So sorry to hear about your experience. It brought a tear to my eye. I can't comment on stitches etc as I had a crash section under general anaesthetic. (Long story, baby on life support, dif hospitals, trouble bonding, suspected brain damage etc etc.) All looking better now. But I can comment on your emotions as although we didn't get little one home until he was 2 wks old, so I guess I had some time to recover I hated thenights. I felt so lonely and was on edge all the time. I was so tired that I hallucinated that the baby was in bed with us. I would also hear a baby crying at all times. I know have been told that that is a sign of sleep deprivation but also can by symptomatic of pnd. I used to find myself crying cuddled up in the corner of the kitchen and yet to everyone else I was doing an amazing job. I eventually told hubby how I was feeling and am now getting counselling. Two weeks is early days both physically and mentally. Babies don't knoe the dif btwn day and night yet and the excitement and novelty of your baby is diminishing for friends etc and your oh probably going back to work. Best thinkg I ever did was to implement a routine at night and several weeks later he would go down at 6.30pm until 10 so then at least I could have tea with oh or bath on own. I do hope you feel better soon, and welcome to the baby forum x x xOh and huge congrats on your baby
hi - i had a 3rd degree tear too. i bled very badly and had to have blood transfusion too. for those who don't know about tears its 1 is skin, 2 is skin and muscle, 3 is skin and muscle including the sphincter and there is a 4th degree tear which is the worse you can get but i'm not sure what that is but it must be bad!
it is true when you have 1st had your baby and you have been through something like this you will feel like you will never be the same again. everything will start to get better but take your time. you will be very emotional anyway because of the baby blues, and exhaustion. losing that much blood takes a lot out of you and you will feel stiff and achey and constantly exhausted. it will get better but get as much help and support as you can.
the wam hairdryer is a really good tip but for gods sake don't do it too hot apparantly it really hurts if you burn yourself (!) and lots of people do (?)
it is very important to do your pelvic floor exercises. you probably won't be able to feel very much at the mo but do several times 3 times a day. if you do have continuing problems there may be something that can be done. i had surgery straight away where they reconstructured/repaired my sphincter and i try and do my pelvic floors (although not as much as i should) I also had follow up a year after the birth of my 1st child which i had 3rd degree tears and will have follow up after this one too (he's 8 months now and i still haven't heard when my appointment will be but i better start practising my pelvic floors for when dr tests my muscle strength!)
nature will heal you in time and pelvic floors will strengthen the muscles and also get blood flowing in that area which i believe will also help with you piles.
This is a really horrible time for you when you should be able to relax and enjoy your beautiful baby. I am sure things will get better but please make sure you get support from your hv.
lots of hugs and best wishes,
jules
just wanted to add make sure you get plenty of iron tablets to keep you going and i know its the last thing on your mind but try and eat plenty of iron rich foor and vitamin c to help its absorption.
Replies
I dont like having sex or my oh touching me 'down there'
I was also vv tearful about the whole thing - some happy tears, some sad tears. My Hubby & mum literally had to force me to go out - i jsut couldn't bare to leave ds behind & i felt like a big fat frump - v depressed about it. HOWEVER, a month down the line i'm feeling much better about everything...have healed down there well, my piles are all but gone (didn't want to use cream as thought it would interfere with cut)! Still can't fit into any of my pre-pregnancy clothes, but have made plans to join Slimming World (I've done this diet b4) & do some exercise - poss pole dancing, i'm game for trying something diff and hopefully get back into horse riding which i love (although that might be a bit longer away for obvious reasons)!!!
Anyways, many congrats to you & Oh on the arrival of Charlie!
Sarah xx
So sorry to hear about your experience. It brought a tear to my eye. I can't comment on stitches etc as I had a crash section under general anaesthetic. (Long story, baby on life support, dif hospitals, trouble bonding, suspected brain damage etc etc.) All looking better now.
But I can comment on your emotions as although we didn't get little one home until he was 2 wks old, so I guess I had some time to recover I hated thenights. I felt so lonely and was on edge all the time. I was so tired that I hallucinated that the baby was in bed with us. I would also hear a baby crying at all times. I know have been told that that is a sign of sleep deprivation but also can by symptomatic of pnd. I used to find myself crying cuddled up in the corner of the kitchen and yet to everyone else I was doing an amazing job. I eventually told hubby how I was feeling and am now getting counselling.
Two weeks is early days both physically and mentally. Babies don't knoe the dif btwn day and night yet and the excitement and novelty of your baby is diminishing for friends etc and your oh probably going back to work. Best thinkg I ever did was to implement a routine at night and several weeks later he would go down at 6.30pm until 10 so then at least I could have tea with oh or bath on own.
I do hope you feel better soon, and welcome to the baby forum x x xOh and huge congrats on your baby
it is true when you have 1st had your baby and you have been through something like this you will feel like you will never be the same again. everything will start to get better but take your time. you will be very emotional anyway because of the baby blues, and exhaustion. losing that much blood takes a lot out of you and you will feel stiff and achey and constantly exhausted. it will get better but get as much help and support as you can.
the wam hairdryer is a really good tip but for gods sake don't do it too hot apparantly it really hurts if you burn yourself (!) and lots of people do (?)
it is very important to do your pelvic floor exercises. you probably won't be able to feel very much at the mo but do several times 3 times a day.
if you do have continuing problems there may be something that can be done. i had surgery straight away where they reconstructured/repaired my sphincter and i try and do my pelvic floors (although not as much as i should) I also had follow up a year after the birth of my 1st child which i had 3rd degree tears and will have follow up after this one too (he's 8 months now and i still haven't heard when my appointment will be but i better start practising my pelvic floors for when dr tests my muscle strength!)
nature will heal you in time and pelvic floors will strengthen the muscles and also get blood flowing in that area which i believe will also help with you piles.
This is a really horrible time for you when you should be able to relax and enjoy your beautiful baby. I am sure things will get better but please make sure you get support from your hv.
lots of hugs and best wishes,
jules
just wanted to add make sure you get plenty of iron tablets to keep you going and i know its the last thing on your mind but try and eat plenty of iron rich foor and vitamin c to help its absorption.
[Modified by: julesy on July 31, 2008 12:29 PM]