do you get on better or worse with other half since baby?

i think we're getting on better, sometimes i see my arse with him if he doesn't help out with stuff but generally we're getting on better, he seems like he's always at work and i get really down cuz he takes so much pressure off me with JJ when he's home so i can get other jobs's good that JJ goes to bed at 9ish cuz then we have the evening to ourselves to watch a DVD or just generally have a cuddle on the sofa image x


  • We get on better (most of the time). We do snap at each other if we are really tired. Its definitely better since Frankie settled down and we started to get some time alone. Although my hubby doesnt do that much 'chore wise' with Frankie he will have her on his own if i wanna get on with stuff. I change all the nappies, do all the feeding, sterilising bottles and bathing but thats cos i prefer to do it. I know i can do it quicker and better lol. He will do them if i ask or im not their though.
  • most men have a fear of newborns! james is much better with Tyler now than a few months ago. He is fab with the boys - just an A***hole to me!
  • i think we get on worse, he does about 50% off looking after jayden,cleaning etc but were so tired we both go to bed early so never really spend time together anymore image but he keeps promiing me we will get better whn lo starts sleeping thr ! i cant see it tho jayden never slept through yet! and hes 7 and half months x
  • Wow, where did you ladies find you ohs????????

    Mine has never done HALF!!!! the child care, or the bed time routine or baths or nappies or any of that... I mean when I spent 8 days in hospital, I came home to find the kids were still in the same clothes I left them in, I didn't want to ask if their teeth had ever been done, and it was obvious they hadn't had their hair brushed, bathed, or anything more than bare survival, but he figures he is a man so should not have to do any of that stuff. The baby did have her nappies changed, but I wouldn't like to say how often. I text messaged him an exact menu of what to feed the kids and when and made sure that a tesco order was delivered to the house from my hospital bed, and it was still all out on the counters, they ate what was easiest (mind I hadn't asked him to make anything more difficult than scrambled eggs), every dish in the house was dirty and he'd ordered pizza with the money in my handbag when he could be bothered to do dishes.... he just spent all day mainly on his computer playing bloody games and didn't bother with the kids more than necessary. To be honest I mainly thought that's how all men acted?He's never done any house work, because he feels it's emasculinating (sp). He has always seen himself as a very "traditional" man and would never been seen doing any of the baby care or house work.

    SO ladies do tell where exactly to you find these ridiculously wonderful men who help so much, or did they come like mine did and you taught them to behave differently?

    Seriously because if I can upgrade... well sounds worth a bit of effort :lol:
  • OMG Hedgie how do you manage?! If my hubby was like that he'd be out on his arse lol!

    We get on about the same - although we never used to argue and now we do, but i put that down to tiredness, and its just stupid squabbling over stuff like who gets to watch what on telly. I'm bf'ing so he doesn't have to do anything like that, but when Oscar wakes in the night he will change him so i can wake up and get a drink before i feed him, and he puts him back to bed when we're done feeding.

    He plays with him, and is very affectionate - he can ALWAYS get a smile out of him. He cleans the bathrooms and the kitchen (i do the living rooms and bedrooms) and he cooks a couple of nights a week. I really don't know what i'd do without him, and i feel bad because i should tell him that more. xx
  • hedgie - you are not alone - mines the same

    I cook, clean and do everything for the children. He does the occasional thing but mostly hes there for himself and for 'playtime' with the boys xx
  • OH and me get on the same as before. We do most things fairly and I wouldn't say I do any more than he does. He believes that having children and running a house is a 2 way thing, NOT just for me to do and he would never expect me to wait on him hand and foot, just as I wouldn't him. When we're ill or tired then we might bicker a bit, but generally, for us, its all 50/50 and I feel incredibly lucky to have him image He's my fiancee, my partner and most of all my soulmate image image image


    [Modified by: Garfield on January 10, 2009 04:32 PM]

  • Me and my husband are the same as always. We always got on really well. Since Kara came along he has been great as well and does his fair share of everything. I only have to ask him to do something if needed and he does it. He doesn't usually need asking. When I was on maternity he came in from work at night and took over to give me a break. Now we are both at work we do everything fairly at night including housework.
  • Hedgie your a star! i would have killed my oh by now!
  • We seem 2 be gettin on a bit better now we share this little person 2gether! Its still early days (5 weeks in) n the Main thing that annoys me is that sometimes he comes home from work n does any pots or hoovering that i've not got round 2 doing n he'll huff n puff about it n look at me as though i'm lazy when i've been up n down all night with brooke then feedin, bathing, dressing, playing n changing her all day, not 2 mention showering, dressing n feeding myself, then doin the washin, sterilising, tidying round, makin beds, ironing, cooking and maybe finding 5 mins 2 sit down! He's very good at night though n usually lets me go 2 sleep bout 10 then he'll do the last feed n change n settle her down! X
  • We still get on really well but I remember quite a few cross words in the months of total sleep deprivation!x
  • We get on the same really! We have our ups and downs but most of the time we're fine. He pee's me off sometimes because he just doesnt think, like today I asked him to do the bottles while I had a shower and Theo was asleep so he washed and sterlilised them and got as far as boiling the water but didnt actually pour it into the bottles so come half an hour later when Theo was screaming for food, the water was still too hot! I went off on him one then about not thinking in adavnce but I have to admit, he is pretty good. He always changes a pooey nappy when he's home and gets up with him on saturday and sunday mornings. My problem is I'm a control freak and wont let him help as much as he wants to and then have a go at him for not helping! I need to let go and let him do more but its so hard watching him do something like a feed because Theo messes around at the moment because he's teething and I just think I could do it better and quicker! But I need to let Rob do more or he wont learn all those little things.
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