crying in her cot...

Hi girls,
know ive posted bout this a few times but Isabella wont sleep in her cot she has been in the bed with me, and ive had enough so ive just put her in and shes crying, should i just leave her? she is 4 and a half months help!!



  • what kind of cry is it?? if millie does a moany cry then i leave her for a few mins as she always falls alseep but i would never not go to her if she was proper crying but thats just me!. i have had millie in my bed a few times when she has not settled cos of teething and when shes had a bad cold but she has always gone back to sleeping and settling herself in her cot once shes feeling better. how long has she been in ur bed for? i read that it doesnt spoil them the odd night in ur bed it will just give them the reasurance they need and will help them and when they r ready they will sleep on their own again. so shes prob ok uness shes been sleeping in ur bed for weeks x
  • try the 5 min rule. leave her 5 mins if she's still cryin go in don't make eye contact settle her than leave room, then leave longer gaps between going in. if she is cryin in a rythum then she is falling asleep. I got it from super nanny I find she has great advice
  • yep she has been in my bed for months because she wont settle and her cry is really high pitched i feel like crying i hate hearing her like this i keep going in and putting her dummy in xx
  • dont give in I know its hard to hear her cry but if you don't start to do it soon it will get harder and harder to do I promise you she will settle down when she realises your not going to pick her up
  • Have you tried one of those things that plays music and shines lights on the ceiling? That helps Frankie settle. Also i would go in every few mins to comfort her then leave her again. Hopefully she will realise you havent deserted her and calm down.
  • yeh millie has one to it works wonders! if she ever wakes i just go and turn it on again it lasts for 10mins so shes normally asleep b4 it ends. i would try leaving her for 5 mins then just to see if she settles. how about rocking her in ur arms til she falls asleep then putting her in cot? just for now to get her use to it? then work up to putting her down awake? x x
  • Ive honestly tried everything, i have her asleep in my arms for half an hour before i put her in the cot, but she wakes as soon as i put her down. i have got her a mobile that projects on the ceiling (winnie the pooh 1) and it doesnt settle her either, i feel really down i dont know wether to leave her to cry but its high pitched n she has tears coming from her eyes but i am at my wits end. Ive just brought her down stairs with me because it sounded like she was choking as she was that worked up. What would u all do in my situation? x
  • i am a wimp and hate to hear millie cry properly so i would prob let her carry on sleeping with me til she was a bit older but i would keep trying her in her cot thats prob not the right thing to do haha but thats what i would do she'd prob still be there at 10 lol. maybe talk to ur hv? see what she suggests? x
  • I know this sounds horrible but if you have picked her up and she has stopped crying there is probably nothing wrong with her and i would suggest to try again. Each time you let her cry then go and pick her up you are making it harder for yourself and sending her mixed messeages about what is going to happen.

    If i was you i would make sure she was ok, dry nappy etc, take her upstairs give her a little cuddle in her room(or yours) then give her a kiss say goodnight and put her down. But you must be ready to do it and be in the right frame of mind that you are going to leave her otherwise there is no point in you both getting upset.

    I have done the crying control with both of mine and it works every time. Expect it to take at least a week to start working and my babies sometimes cryed for 2hrs but they will eventully give in and go to sleep. I know it's so hard but it is defientley worth it.

    Oh yeah sorry to keep on but the reason why babies cry gets higher and more destressing is because it is natures way of getting the mums attention not because they actully are in distress so try and keep that in mind (as long as your sure your baby is not ill etc)

    good luck x
  • Hi like Amie you should try leaving her i had to do this with both my daughter and my son, leavethem for 5 minutes and then go in dont speak or anything just check she is ok, then leave her a little longer. With my daughter i sat down stairs and cried but i perservered and after 4 nights of repeating it she was sleeping in her own bed which was bliss. I know its hard but definately worth it in the end xx
  • aww thanks girls 4 all your advice, i will deff perservere and try controlled crying. I'll let u all know how i get on xxxx
  • Hi, bit late response but jack went through a stage of being exactly like this, he was a nightmare and i had to cuddle him to sleep for ages until he was in a pretty deep sleep but the majority of the time as soon as i put him dowin in his cot he would scream. i had nights where i was doing this 4 and 5 times, getting him to sleep putting him down and him waking up. Anyway i did the controlled crying, leave him 5 mins and then 10 mins and another 10 mins etc, the first night was absolutely horrible he screamed for about 55 minutes and i just sat in my bedroom listening to him and crying myself. anyway he eventually fell asleep and the next night he screamed for about 30 minutes and eventually it got less and less, now if he cries for more than 5 minutes that is a long time for him. you can usually tell if there's anything wrong, with jack as soon as i picked him up he shut up so i knew he was fine. the first couple of nights are the worst and then it got better. Also, as much as jack loves his dummy i did the controlled crying without it. let us know how you get on. x x
  • Aww honey TBH I am not a fan of controlled crying at all, it breaks some mums hearts & doesn't even work for some babies. You don't need her to sleep in her cot if it's not working for you - co-sleeping can be safe as long as you don't smoke and don't co sleep when you're VERY tired or have been taking strong meds etc. It's up to you really, but if you are regretting leaving her to cry then I'd re-consider
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