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Baby in our room

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  • we moved LO in his own room at 3 weeks, we keep both dors open and always hear him, even little sneezes or moans.....worked for us xxx

    14+5
  • We moved our lo out at 4 months as we were all disturbing each other! She did sleep better once we moved her! I have a monitor so can always hear her if she wakes!
  • My LO has been in our room in his cot since he was born. I guess we are lucky to have a big bedroom particularly as his cot bed is massive! He will stay with us until he is one to be on the safe side. It gives me peace of mind to hear his little guzzling noises, I wouldn't feel like that if he were in the nursery
  • heya
    i spoke to my health visitor about this and she said having baby in your room does nothing to reduce the chane of cot death and has no real benefit except not having so far to walk if baby cries for you
    xx

    Dont agree with that at all, With baby in the same room your more inclined to check on them, and in all honesty Monitors can fail just like your mobile phone or alarm clock when it randomly decides not to work, She shouldnt be telling you that, god forbid something happened to a child of a mother shes says that to

    The info about having baby in room until 1yrs old is 'not new', Just i think they've lowered it for knowledge sake because the average age/percentage of babies dying from sids is upto 6mo's But it can effect up to 1yr olds .

    I love having my daughter close by, she doesnt wake me up with her snoring, in fact puts my mind to rest. Her being there doesnt get in the way of romance with the o/h image its what ye make of the situation that counts


    http://tickers.TickerFactory.com/ezt/d/2;10711;440/st/20090423/n/%2A-+%2A++Cadence-Rai+%2A-%2A/dt/5/k/f1bf/age.png



  • Ive had all 3 of my boys in our room past 12months - for the reasons stated above, i just feel more secure knowing there right there....Evans 10 months next week and hes still in with us and will be for a while, until he goes into a big boys bed image x
  • hi ladies, I posted already on this, i think you ladies are lovely and all great mum however i think if you have given advice on keeping baby in with you till one it should be respected, i had my ds in with me till he was seven moths old, he is now two sleep 12 to 14 hours a night and my dd is in with me she is five months, i will be keeping her in my room till she is a least a year, i love waking up and seeing her, i think three weeks old is too young be alone in own room, i understand there may be tight rooms but is it worth the risk?

    [Modified by: mummy to 2 on January 14, 2010 09:02 PM]

  • We moved Peter at three months as he is sensitive to light and movement (though not noise), so we were disturbing him when we went to bed every night. He slept much better after that.

    I honestly cannot imagine keeping him in the same room as us for a year. At 10 months he wakes in the morning and plays quietly for a while most mornings, a skill I don't think he would have learned in with us. Like a lot of health advice, my inclination is to take it seriously but also listen to my gut about what is best for my son. I know him better as an individual (rather than as a statistical chance) than anyone else. For us it was a risk worth taking and it has paid off handsomely so far in terms of his sleeping patterns (plus he is the world's loudest sleeper so I have no problems keeping track of him even in the room next door. image
  • Bethany went into her own room at 9wks - much earlier than id planned and we made the decision as we were disturbing her and she was disturbing us so noone was getting a great sleep. Since then shes slept through and at almost 1yr she is a fantastic sleeper. I must say tho as she was only small we kept her in the moses basket til she outgrew it and just placed it in her cot.

    I did check on her every night for the first week or so tho but gradually started to relax.

    I think its personal choice - you are the mum and only you know best for your baby.

    Good luck with the birth Mrs I.
  • James is five months old and still in our room, I think we will move him at six months. We had to take out some furniture to make room for the cot as he grew out of his crib quicker than I thought he would!

    Im shocked that your HV said to ignore the advice given by the Department of Health to be honest, SIDS carried out research a few years ago and found that having the baby sleep in the same room as you reduces the risk of cot death.

    If you do have a baby in their own room before six months a ticking clock works well apparently or a radio on low volumne xx
  • We had ds1 & 2 in our room in a moses basket and then a cot for the first 8 mths. dd3 was 1yr but that was circumstances (we had moved house and her room wasn't ready lol!

    Each mum is different, but personally I wanted to be with them, for ease of bf'ing through the night and for peace of mind - I was right there and I could hear every snuffle. And I wouldn't dismiss the evidence on SIDS either - sorry - especially not in the first few months. But I think it's up to each mum what is right for them and their circumstances.

    Even now I sleep with our bedroom door wide open so I can hear if any of them get up in the night. As a parent it's just part of what I do - it's not a drag for me - it's just that I feel so incredibly protective towards them.

    It didn't actually affect the romantic side either lol (although a newborn baby and stitches did!!).

    Mx

  • Ive had all 3 of my boys in our room past 12months - for the reasons stated above, i just feel more secure knowing there right there....Evans 10 months next week and hes still in with us and will be for a while, until he goes into a big boys bed image x

    Love that
  • hi ladies, I posted already on this, i think you ladies are lovely and all great mum however i think if you have given advice on keeping baby in with you till one it should be respected, i had my ds in with me till he was seven moths old, he is now two sleep 12 to 14 hours a night and my dd is in with me she is five months, i will be keeping her in my room till she is a least a year, i love waking up and seeing her, i think three weeks old is too young be alone in own room, i understand there may be tight rooms but is it worth the risk?

    [Modified by: mummy to 2 on January 14, 2010 09:02 PM]



    Totally agree I think at earliest 3mo's an to me thats the limit, Like I appreciate women saying i no my child an its my decision but in retrospect its Hindsight You couldn't possibly no what the outcome could be, so reducing any risk when it comes to your children is mandatory/natural,

    Just a few months ago a 5month old boy in Liverpool who was in a baby competition with Cadence died! an if you had seen this bouncing bubbly baby, you couldn't imagine the outcome, Think people partially associate Cotdeath with weak/vulnerable/ill babies!
  • We moved Peter at three months as he is sensitive to light and movement (though not noise), so we were disturbing him when we went to bed every night. He slept much better after that.

    I honestly cannot imagine keeping him in the same room as us for a year. At 10 months he wakes in the morning and plays quietly for a while most mornings, a skill I don't think he would have learned in with us. Like a lot of health advice, my inclination is to take it seriously but also listen to my gut about what is best for my son. I know him better as an individual (rather than as a statistical chance) than anyone else. For us it was a risk worth taking and it has paid off handsomely so far in terms of his sleeping patterns (plus he is the world's loudest sleeper so I have no problems keeping track of him even in the room next door. image)

    Erm My daughter Plays to herself and sings an talks every morning an shes in with us.

    an these stats are not just randomly plucked out of thin air, they are created from true events an research, me knowing that its possible makes their research influence my gut
  • We had ds1 & 2 in our room in a moses basket and then a cot for the first 8 mths. dd3 was 1yr but that was circumstances (we had moved house and her room wasn't ready lol!

    Each mum is different, but personally I wanted to be with them, for ease of bf'ing through the night and for peace of mind - I was right there and I could hear every snuffle. And I wouldn't dismiss the evidence on SIDS either - sorry - especially not in the first few months. But I think it's up to each mum what is right for them and their circumstances.

    Even now I sleep with our bedroom door wide open so I can hear if any of them get up in the night. As a parent it's just part of what I do - it's not a drag for me - it's just that I feel so incredibly protective towards them.

    It didn't actually affect the romantic side either lol (although a newborn baby and stitches did!!).


    Mx


    image Hah thats me
  • this is the best information i have read so far on SIDS

    http://www.drgreene.com/21_509.html
  • We moved Peter at three months as he is sensitive to light and movement (though not noise), so we were disturbing him when we went to bed every night. He slept much better after that.

    I honestly cannot imagine keeping him in the same room as us for a year. At 10 months he wakes in the morning and plays quietly for a while most mornings, a skill I don't think he would have learned in with us. Like a lot of health advice, my inclination is to take it seriously but also listen to my gut about what is best for my son. I know him better as an individual (rather than as a statistical chance) than anyone else. For us it was a risk worth taking and it has paid off handsomely so far in terms of his sleeping patterns (plus he is the world's loudest sleeper so I have no problems keeping track of him even in the room next door. image)

    Erm My daughter Plays to herself and sings an talks every morning an shes in with us.

    an these stats are not just randomly plucked out of thin air, they are created from true events an research, me knowing that its possible makes their research influence my gut

    I am sure that your daughter does. My son probably wouldn't because that is who he is. And that is my point, really. Every baby is an individual and needs to be treated as such. Of course the stats haven't been picked out of the air. I never said they were and that is why they should be taken seriously. But they are just that, statistics, so predictions of risk rather than absolute fact. As with anything to do with raising a child, as a parent our responsibility to weigh the risks, based on the research, and then make decisions for our entirely individual children based on that. And none of us have any right to condemn another parent who does so responsibly. Sleeping in your room works for you and your daughter. It wouldn't work for us and our son. It wasn't a decision we took lightly and we certainly didn't dismiss the research, but our son is more than a statistic and always will be.
  • I've not dismissed research, I've taken advice and have considered the options. I simply can't spend every waking minute thinking that my baby will die of SIDs. He slept in my bed on a handful of occasions because I couldn't physically stay awake any longer to sit up and feed him. That's not advised either. The risk of cot death is so so small that I've personally had to put it in perspective in order to retain my own sanity. So much advice is contradictory - including some of the advice regarding SIDs - and I can't do it all.

    Jak is napping in his room right now, but I've been ironing in the living room for the past hour. I can't be in the same room as him 24/7, it's not practical or possible. He needs his rest and I would disturb him because he'd either smell me and wake up, or he'd hear me and want to play.

    Miss I - what happens when the baby comes may change from your original plan. I know my plan changed! Unfortunately, you can beat yourself up over any decision you make as long as someone says the words 'cot death'. It's so frightening because we don't know what causes it. However, personally I have decided that I wouldn't wake up if Jak stopped breathing and he was right by my head: I can't hear him breathing sometimes even though he is. He's a strong, healthy baby and I can't spend the next year imagining every night that he's going to die if he's not in my room. Neither can some other mums, and that's fine. I think TheHistoryGirl said it best - my son isn't just a statistic either!
  • Hey, ive read the replies to this with interest and Jaks mum has just mentioned something I was thinking about all the way through this post - what about nap times?? I have just started putting the boys in their cot for naps during the day...do I need to be in their room while their napping - urm, no! However, they are in our room still, and while they can still share a cot, they will be.

    I do think that room can be an issue for people. Thats not them being choosy, thats just fact, and can make things difficult. We are lucky to have a big bedroom as, at 4 weeks, the boys still werent sleeping well (I dont mean through the night, but no longer than 1 or 2 hours at a time). So, we put them in together and suddenly, 4-5hours sleep! They couldnt be in the moses basket together as it was too dangerous, so their cot came into our room. However, they wont be able to share a cot forever. Theyre already disturbing eachother more. Again, we are lucky that we could fit both cots in our room if needed but we probably wont as we wouldnt be able to move!

    If you cant fit the cot in your room, then you cant. And, if you weigh it up, its more dangerous for a 6 month old who has begun to roll over and maybe sit up aided, and definitely move much more, to still be in a moses basket balanced on a stand, than in a cot in their own room.

    I agree that the statistics are important, but I also believe that I wouldnt know if Ryan stopped breathing as he is so quiet, and he sleeps near my head. As mothers we are made to feel so guilty about so many things - breast vs bottle, our room vs theirs, weaning early vs not, car seat choices etc etc etc - and all we are trying to do is the best for our children and ultimately, ourselves.

    Ive rambled and I dont even know if ive made sense! Basically, yes, the boys are still in our room, but I am not always in there with them (bed time and naps). The risk of SIDS is very real and shouldnt be taken lightly, but there are other circumstances that must be taken into consideration.

    Gemma, Ryan and Alfie 14 + 4
  • Ladies, just for the record, the NHS SIDS prevention points are actually v simple:

    Put baby to sleep on their back, in the 'feet to foot' position in cot.

    Do not smoke or allow anyone to smoke around baby or in the room baby will sleep.

    Baby in a cot or crib in your your room for the first 6mths.

    Make sure baby's room is cool.

    Full details here:

    http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/Sudden-infant-death-syndrome/Pages/Prevention.aspx

    Note it says 6mths not 1 year - I think NCT are a bit mother-earth for some people lol!

    I think the guidelines are pretty simple - if you possibly can I would keep baby with you for 6mths (or for as long as you can) - but obviously there are going to be some times where that's not possible, as some of the ladies said on here.

    Mx
  • We're planning on having LO in our room until she sleeps through the night, we have no were in her room to do feeds so I would need to bring her back in our room to feed anyway xxx
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