self settling, where do i start ?


Tyler is now 7 months old and to go to sleep at night or for naps he is swaddled (one arm at night) and fed and rocked to sleep.(could i do anymore bad habits, probably not). However, he is due to start nursery shortly when I go back to work and I would love for him to be able to self settle. Controlled crying and cry it out are out for me, I just dont believe in it (nothing against those who have done it, its just not for me).

So, bearing in mind all the props we have for sleep. Where do I start ? He's getting harder to put down now as he fights the swaddle but cant sleep without some restraint (he's also started trying to crawl in the cot when completely unswaddled).




  • hey there!!

    Obviously I am no sleep expert, although I don't post topics very often they generally theme around sleep...! But could you try just removing one thing at a time, rather than taking away everything at once, for example maybe bring bottle forward a little bit so he isn't so tired he falls asleep on it.

    Also have you tried the pat and shhhhh or pick up put down? Its not instant and for the first night or so you could be doing it for quite a while, but my DS now responds well to the pat and shhh (when he's not rolling over on to his front and getting upset!!) You put them down, rub their tummy and shhh, then leave the room, When/if they start to get upset, go back in and do again, it just reassures them that you're still there without having to hold them to sleep. The PUPD is the same theory, just you pick up to reassure you're still there then put back down.

    Hope these ideas help, and don't worry about getting into bad habits, a friend of mine said nothing you do can't be undone, and I think she's right, well I hope she is anyway, cos there's quite a few things we do which you 'shouldn't!!"

    HTH xxxxx
  • Me again! I'll be watching this thread like a hawk - we are also the house of bad habits ... Freddie is fed to sleep at night, cuddled to sleep during the day - then he naps on me so he'll sleep for more than 20 minutes, not forgetting that when he's unsettled in the night he often ends up in our bed because I'm too tired to argue with him .... and I'm also guilty of feeding him back to sleep as he settles better that way.

    Like you I'm also wanting him to start self settling prior to nursery as I can't stand the thought of him crying himself to sleep and I don't expect the nursery staff will have time to cuddle and hold him wile he sleeps. He's also not going to be able to rely on a bit of booby to help him sleep while he's there!

    Get myself into a complete state thinking about it but like you CC and crying it out isn't for us.

    One of the girls from Baby has kindly offered to send me the No Cry Sleep Solution, I can read it and pass it on if you like?

  • try

    you have to buy the book but they are amazing!
  • I will also be watching this thread with great interest....

    Our LO will only go to sleep when either fed to sleep or rocked to sleep, or if we go for a walk. Therefore I seem to spend half my day either feeding, rocking or walking!!

    I have tried controlled crying but she gets herself in such a state, I hate to see her so worked up.

    I can kind of manage with how things are at the moment, but think there will come a point when something will need to be done, and it may be sooner than LO would like!!

    Let us kn ow if you have any success. x
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