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"My Baby" - a question!

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  • I also think its down to relationships, my mum calls mine her babies when talking about them and its never a case of her thinking their hers, but i feel its a tad more loving than just saying my grandchildren. My mum is also there for them a lot of the time and they have a great relationship with them.

    On the flip side, my mil does sod all with them so if she wa sto say it i would feel angry as she has no right as she doesnt make an impact on their lives and never really sees them.

    xxxx
  • I totally agree maenad. I also see so many 'My awful in-laws' posts on here. I'm not saying they aren't true, but I think a lot of people are very hard on their mil/sil. Why shouldnt mils etc get as much love and fun out of our lo's as we do! I'm not perfect, I have hang-ups too. My ds much prefers SIL & MIL above anyone else (Me, his dad) and having sil living so close I have found it hard at times. My Mil and I do not always see eye-to-eye but she is great and most importantly, brilliant with my ds. Also, my ds looks A LOT more like sil than anyone else! He has her exact colouring and some features. I am certain when people see us out and she is holding his hand they think he is her son not mine. But the point is, I know he's MY son and even though he asks for sil and mil loads, he'll always be their nephew/grandson rather than their actual son. And if he is poorly or wakes in the night he wants me rather than them which proves my point really. I want him to have a good relationship with as much family as poss, DS has loads of family, I never had hardly any! (OFC the immediate family, but other than that, 1 uncle who I see once every five yrs or so, 1 grandma as my other died of cancer, and I never had grandads as both my parents lost their dads young).
  • it would drive me mad cos they are mine and my hubby2b babies, we made them and we bring them up together so i would not be happy if someone in my family would do it x
  • I suppose it helps that DH and I have a fantastic relationship with my parents! If we didn't get on it might feel diffeent!

    I see what you mean and I agree but I have my moments with my FIL and I love it when he calls DS 'my baby'. Possibly because I had spent time with him with other small children in my family, friends children etc and he barely acknowledged them so it was a huge relief when he was so besotted with DS. He meets me at the door to takes DS off me when we go round and says 'hello my baby' to him, I think it's sweet.

    Actually now I think about it my entire family do it, my aunt sends me text messages saying 'where's my baby' when we are home visiting everyone.

    I have wondered in the past why it bothers people so much, it makes me happy that he has so much love in his life.
  • My mil lives next door but only ever sees DD once a week when we bring her in the see them, (tbh its probably not even every week) she only calls in when she wants something and then tries to wind my 1 year old girl who clearly just wants to be left alone (I dont know of any 1 year old who still needs winding???) So when she says it it really annoys me. my mum says it but corrects herself and says "our baby, you have to share!" but its in an affectionate way and said jokingly and I dont mind at all. mil has 12 grandchildren and always annoys them saying "are you nannas girl" etc but yet has no patience to play with them or anything. Its a more possessive thing than an affectionate one and I dont like it.
    Well done if anyone followed that, just had to get it out lol.
  • My mum and sister are constantly asking "how's my baby?" it angers me a LOT!
    I'm only 17, so I wanted both my partner and my mum at the birth, and it bothers me greatly that it wasn't me or my partner that held our daughter first... It was my MUM!
    I feel like (and I know this is completely stupid) if my mum and sister keep calling my daughter their baby, then she might grow up to think that I'm not her only mum.
    I want it to be me and her dad that she clings to and wants to cuddle all the time... And yes, I love my mum and my sister and I'm glad they're around to help me look after LO but sometimes I feel like they just want to take over...
  • It's definately a MIL thing for me. I know that it is totally irrational and she only says it because he is her only grandson and she loves him dearly. I try to tell myself not to be bothered but I just can't help it, I really wish I could! I am pleased that DS is loved by his grandparents I just get very irritated by MIL and her controlling ways.
  • i would be another that would find MIL saying it unacceptable, but thats probably because i do not like her, saying that it hasn't happened or certainly not when i have been in earshot!

    gsmummy55 you are more than welcome to adopt my MIL i am sure you would find her a delight! :lol:
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