Sleep Training

Hello All

I'm not looking for a debate just a bit of advice. My LO is coming up to 6 months and will not go to sleep unless fed to sleep on the breast, he still refuses any type of bottle and in a few weeks I am stopping bfing aqnd am worried about his sleep. My DS1 was formula fed and went into a routine far easier than DS2 I did use controlled crying with DS1 but seemed to be an easier going child and adapted easily to this. DS2 is again a very happy wee thing but he seems to be a lot more determined in his personality than DS1 so I'm a bit wary of using CC as I think it may be a long drawn out process with him and a lot of stress for the both of us. I have heard of other methods used but don't know much about them PUP??

I'm not a fan of babies sleeping in with parents (just my opinion) and it's not something I want to start as he once asleep he'll happily sleep in his own room I want to be able to put him down in his cot awake at nap times and at bedtime and to be able to kiss him goodnight and for him to be happy to drop off to sleep, I loved the fact that i could kiss and cuddle my DS1 and he would happily go over to sleep. I'v'e tried a dummy too to try and put him down to sleep but it seems to keep him awake and he plays away in his cot after about 15 mins he'll spit it out and start to cry lol my DS1 is a thumb sucker but as of yet DS2 doesn't seem to be as interested.

any advice helpful at all as I'm really dreading this when I stop bfing.

thanks again xx

Posts

  • hi there

    we started sleep training with DD just before she was 6 months (about 3 weeks ago). She is FF but would only go to sleep if being fed and I needed to break the habit and teach her to self settle. The thought of CC makes me shiver so we did the Baby Whisperer PUPD. For 2 or 3 nights it was hard work but TBH not as bad as I thought it would be.

    As we'd got into bad habits I read the 'Baby Whisperer Solves Your Problems' book religiously before starting as there is quite a bit more to the method than "pick up when they're crying and put them down as soon as they stop". In particular after reaidng the book I decided that I wanted to formalise DD's routine at the same time as sleep training and the book also describes how to do that and how it all fits together. I would really recommend reading it before starting - it gave me lots of confidence (especially when she was screaming on night 1).

    There is also a BW forum which I always find interesting but haven't really used any advice from IYSWIM. http://www.babywhispererforums.com/

    Good luck honey, I presonally think it's a great method. From waking anywhere up to 5 times a night DD now mostly sleeps through and self settles for naps and bedtime.

    xxxx

  • Hi

    We started sleep training Adam two weeks ago, when he was almost 6 months old. We wanted him to be able to settle himself off to sleep when he woke up in the night and to self settle for naps.

    We basically used a combo of CC and PUPD.

    So we would put Adam down awake, give him a big kiss, leave the room.
    Waited until he started crying.
    Leave it 30 seconds.
    Go in, pick him up, calm him right down.
    Put him back down, big kiss, leave the room
    Waited until he started crying.
    Leave it one minute.
    Go in, pick him up, calm him right down.
    Etc
    Etc
    Leaving it slightly longer each time (2 mins, 3 mins, 4 mins etc).

    So unlike PUPD he did cry for short periods in his cot, but unlike CC we actually picked him up and soothed him rather than just saying 'go to sleep' or whatever.

    The longest he has ever cried for was 5 mins and that was on the first night. He now sleeps through mostly (or wakes once and is back down within a minute) and slef settles much better (though we are still working on it!).

    Good luck with whichever method you choose.

    xxx
  • i have just been using cc for my 10month old who was always breastfed/cuddled to sleep. the first 2 nights were HELL, but night 3, and shes got it!!

    i was helped by www.babysleepanswers.co.uk..amazing website with brilliant sleep therapists to help!
  • We did cc too, worked a treat and my little man is determined to say the least :lol:

    However you know your baby best if you dont think cc is the way to go, there is pupd, which someone has put a link for bw website there is also gradual withdrawl, so you slowly leave the room http://www.sleepytot.com/sleepytot_community/articles/baby_sleep_training__gradual_withdrawal.phtml

    We tried all 3 with Dylan, cc was actually the method that made him less hysterical strangely!

    Good luck with whatever you choose image

    xxx
  • thanks all, i think i'll try pupd frst and then cc if the other won't work my worry is with pupd (although i dont know much about it so i'll have to read as suggested) is that if I'm going in to reece over and over again then it might make himmore upset as with ds1 i always found it better just to leave him (wasn't ever for long but if i ever started going in etc etc itprolonged it but then ds1, I think, didn't have such a stubborn wee personality lol

    think i'll go to amazon, purchase the baby book and then do some research, it could also be with each baby you get softer lol I do remember ds1 crying did not pull at my heartstrings just as much as it does with ds2 if that makes sense, dont they always say the youngest is the most spoit lol lol xxxx

    thanks very much again girsl fro your advice it has been very helpful xx
  • sorry one last quesiton did you all start with the nighttime sleep and then continue with the day time naps as well so sort of once you've started thats it for every sleep?
  • Thats why cc worked much better for us as picking Dylan up got him far more upset than leaving him a few minutes. As with PUPD everytime I put him down he became hyserical. But they are all different and PUPD maybe best for Reece.
    For us naps were the main issue so we did both day and night time sleep at once. It took a day for him to really start to get it, now he will still cry when he gets put down as no matter how tired he is he just wants to play but its stopped usually by the time i've left the room and gone into the next room.

    Good luck with getting him to self settle hun

    xxxx
  • I started sleep training at 23 weeks as LO would not sleep until 2am and would only have 20 min naps throughout the day.
    I went with Baby Whisperers EASY routine which works by sorting the daytime so that night time falls into place.
    It was 3 days of really hard work but now she has set naps, is in bed for 7.30pm and can self settle (teething permitting!)

    I know sleep training isn't for everyone but I don't know what I would have done without it! She was like a different baby within a week!

    xxx
  • thanks again dylansmum - naps are my main issue too i have to say he is usually down by 730 every night now (prob just jinxed myself)

    lulu i bought the bw book last night so it should be hear tomorrow, going to try pupd first and if it doesn;t work will go with cc xx
  • Have you tried putting him down awake? A week ago I'd have told you that my DS needed cuddling/bf to sleep, until I was holding him and his sister cracked her head on her bedframe - I put him (awake but content) in his cot and went to see to her and when I went back he was asleep and stayed that way for 2 hours! He now, magically and for no reason at all, will happily go down awake for his day naps, and tonight we have tried putting him down awake for bed and thus far thus quiet....touch wood!

    I really wouldn't do CC with a child so young. Babies don't develop object permanence (the idea that when you are out of sight you still exist) until 8-9 and it's my personal opinion that leaving a small baby screaming for it's mother when it cannot comprehend why she has disappeared and doesn't appreciate that she is coming back, is incredibly cruel. There is nothing 'controlled' about a baby who thinks it's been abandoned and falls asleep exhausted by it's own terror.

    I would try the gradual retreat method, maybe? Sit next to him and pat and shush and stroke his belly or head until he goes to sleep, then progress to just sitting next to him, then a foot from the cot, then two feet, then by the door - you get the idea. It will take a few weeks maybe but it will teach him to go to sleep independently whilst still feeling safe and secure.
  • thanks for the tips mrs, i think i'll try everything lol the other thing with ds2 compared to ds1 is he is so much more active?? ds1 only really required any sort of sleep training when he had been ill and had been in our bed for a few nights etc and it didn;t take long. when i put ds2 down awake he will do either one of two things - have a wee sing, roll about play with his hands and hsake his head as if to shake the sleep off or number 2 scream the whole house down which i cant do to him i did try one afternoon last week but didn;t really try any method just myown of going back into him, re feeding him it was a disaster and i felt awful as although he was not cryong constantly every time i put him down he screamed and i deffo just made it worse, i felt so crap afterwards image he gets so excited when he see me lol i might try the sleep retreat before ds1 goes back to school but i think ds2 will be more interested in playing with me lol you never know though eh xxx
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