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Stay at home mum
Hey
I am on mat leave now till June next year. I earn good money in my job and was told I would have to go back full time for 6 month or I would need to pay back my mat leave my work place has given me which is fair enough. The thing is, it means so much for me to stay at home and bring up my little girl, I tried to talk to hubby about maybe not going back to work but we were in a bit of debt and so it was hard.
Our in laws have very kindly paid off our cc debt which means we can pay them back, which again they have very sweetly said we can start in Jan. Now hubby has sent me a email about half an hour ago saying he wants me to stay home and look after Rose and any other little ones we will have.
Is anybody on mat leave now and thinking of not going back??
K xx
I am on mat leave now till June next year. I earn good money in my job and was told I would have to go back full time for 6 month or I would need to pay back my mat leave my work place has given me which is fair enough. The thing is, it means so much for me to stay at home and bring up my little girl, I tried to talk to hubby about maybe not going back to work but we were in a bit of debt and so it was hard.
Our in laws have very kindly paid off our cc debt which means we can pay them back, which again they have very sweetly said we can start in Jan. Now hubby has sent me a email about half an hour ago saying he wants me to stay home and look after Rose and any other little ones we will have.
Is anybody on mat leave now and thinking of not going back??
K xx
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Replies
i wanted to look after my son. yes we will have less money and i have alot of good comments and bad from people and i dont care, its our choice. i have nothing agaisnt working mums, mine was one! but alot of girls i no want to do it but its not an option.
i will go back when our youngest is in school,5 yrs old or whatever it is. and we are only planning 2, my son is 8 months at mo.
i do no that you have to return for a certain amount of time in order not to pay mat pay back. my old job was 3 months. but i handing in notice as i didnt want to mess my employer around as i worked in hospital and they need to get someone trained.
good luck whatever you decide!x
I loved being a mum so much i couldn't bear to go back to work, especially full time being away from home at least 7am-7pm mon-fri, i felt i'd never see my son so what would be the point having him.
I asked for flexi working but employer refused so that made my final decision even easier, i;m a stayathome mum and loving it!
I will go back to work eventually but i think that's just what it'll be ..work not my career, my family is too important to miss out on for money! We do ok on OH's income and still get the odd holiday and have my horses, just can't buy flashy cars anymore!
xx
I have just sent my 4 week notice letter to my job yesterday, I knew from the beginning I wouldnt be going back there had a lot of shit with my boss which ended in a Grievance which i couldnt fight because i ended up really ill with preclampsia, I will go back to work at some point but right now im a stay at home mum. me and oh dont have any debt which makes it much easier, i must say though being 21 and not having a proper wage every month is very hard, but my little angel is worth it
xx Lynsey
I am praying that we can work it out that we can afford for me not to go back.Sadly we rent so that is a problem but I would carry on renting for a few more years of it meant I could bring Rose up.
I do worry what people will say as I worry they will think I am being lazy not going back but I know it can be hard work looking after a little one all day which some people just do not get,
K xx
no way will people think you are lazy!
with james i went back 4 and a half days when he was 11 months and his grandparents look after him but i hated it! managed 6 months then quit. i did bit of private work as a physio and got involved in a business i could do at night at home!
because i was at home hubby put more into work and he has now got a big pay rise so we are better off than when i worked!
so i would say go for it- keep looking out for oppurtunities and it really doesn't matter if you have to keep renting!
good luck Annax
I dont think I could go back to work full time now, I would really miss my daughter too much and I want to be able to drop her off at school and be there to pick her afterwards so even when she's in school I'll only do part time hrs during school time. Were not going to leave it long before TTC no.2 so I'll definately not feel like Im being lazy being a SAHM with 2 babies to look after!
As the other ladies have said follow your heart. Don't feel guilty if you decide to stay at home and look after lo, it is not the easy option at all! Good luckxx
Before I fell pregnant, hubby and I discussed that I would be a sahm. We both agreed that to be a mother it would be me looking after them and not sending them elsewhere. At one point I did consider doing bank shifts but I didnt enjoy the staff i was working with so it didnt turn into an option. I need to return to work to keep my nurse registration. However, im thinking that nursing was the right thing to do at the time, but now my family comes first and I will do a return to nursing course when my daughter is older if I feel it is right. My hubby wants to ttc no 2 and i said we would wait until Jan. When my hubby talks about work i say I would do this or that as a nurse. But on a day to day basis i dont miss it at all.
Money was tight when our daughter was born and up until she was 14mths as my hubby was a student but we got by. No holidays or luxuries but my family came first. We are starting at the bottom of the earnings ladder are aiming to go up it! lol!
I started working for myself at the beginning of the year to earn a bit of extra money. I love it as it is so flexible and if I dont want to work I dont. Also, when I work I take my daughter with me if my oh is working.
'' As the other ladies have said follow your heart. Don't feel guilty if you decide to stay at home and look after lo, it is not the easy option at all!''
Bellah is right. Remember, luxuries, holidays etc you can do/get at a later date. A son or daughters childhood you cant replace.
It sounds like you ahve already made up yourm mind. You believe it is important o stay at home and bring up your children. You oh has just told you too. I personally believe, that even though money can be tight, it doesnt mean you cant stay at home to look after your children.
Glad to hear you and rose are doing better! Im a nurse too and thought id go back to work after but have decided to give up to become a full time mum. Not only do i not want to leave him with strangers, (we have no family who can look after jack) but by the time i paid childcare id be no better off really maybe clearing ??200 a month which i decided wasnt enough to make me return. Ill go back maybe to nursing or maybe to something else once our family is complete but for now im happy being at home.
On a pay front i took full mat pay which means id have to pay it back if i dont go back, so im gonna go back one a day a week to work my notice and i have anual leave so wont end up working much of it anyway.
good luck
xx
I'm in the lucky situation of not having to go back to work, but I've chosen to go back 3 days/week. I'm a teacher so my hours (in the classroom, at least) aren't too long.
Before she was 6 months old I couldn't even contemplate leaving her, but after this age she started to become a lot more independent and I could see she didn't "need" me (not me specifically, anyway) any more. I also started to feel a bit bored - sounds awful, but I wanted to feel useful in more ways than just one.
I'm really enjoying being back and I LOVE picking Lily up in the afternoon - I can't think of anything else all the way there! I definitely appreciate my days off with her more now. I also think being around other kids and adults is good for her (she's at nursery one day a week and childminder two days).
I guess you need to see how you feel about it when the time comes! Being lazy doesn't come into it - LOs are just as much work as holding down a job. It's your decision and sod what everyone else thinks! You'll know what's right in your heart. Hope you're enjoying your little Rose