determined to start routine

Hi ladies

tyler is 6 weeks old and i'm determined to start some sort of bedtime routine with him, just wondered at 6 weeks what kind of time should i be starting ? am also going to try and get him to sleep in his moses upstairs in our room rather than downstairs with one of us. I cant cope with no sleep anymore...

sarah

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  • Jack at that age went to sleep about 9ish and gradually it got earlier and earlier and he now goes down about 7.30.

    I never put him down if he wasnt tierd coz i think he would just create and then wed all be stressed, i just looked for him rubbing his eyes and looking sleepy. I used to take him into our room change him, sing a song gently and feed him, all in dim and quiet room. Some nights he would go down lovely and other nights wed use controlled crying! As he got older i adjusted his routine, so sometimes now we watch a programme or we read or we sing! Then he goes to bed.

    I think you have to do what works for you and how you want your routine to be. But whatever u pick you ahve to stick to it, so if u want bath to be in your routine then u have to make sure ur willing to bath him every night before bed.

    Good luck

    xxx
  • i started a routine with my little girl at 5 weeks.
    7.30pm bath then take her into my room, i dress her then she has her bottle the room is dim and quite plus i dont talk to her once she has started her bottle, then i wrap her up and put her down for the night.
    she is 8 weeks on weds and sleeps from 8.30pm till 5.30am, hoping in time she will sleeping later in the mornings xx
  • I started at 5 weeks, and have kept to it ever since (now 4 months and sleeps like a dream)

    Bath at 6.30, bottle at 6.45 and down at 7. Always put her down awake and left to self settle. when she was little obviously we picked her up when crying, but it only took about a week to get her sleeping when we put her down.

    We dream fed at 11pm until about 9 weeks, and she would also wake about 4. Dropped the dream feed and she went to 1.30, then 2, then 2.30 etc until about 11/12 weeks when she started sleeping 7 - 7.

    Now sleeps 7 - 8am, and wakes in the night, but talks herself back to sleep.

    It made a huge difference to us as got our evenings back. I should mention though that we put LO in cot in her own room at 5 weeks as she hated the moses basket. For us I think that was a huge factor - she likes her space lol x

    HTH
  • We started with Charlotte at 6 weeks too. We began at 7:30-8pm with bath, bottle, story, songs, cuddle and bed in basket in our room. Always put her down awake too to learn how to self settle. At first we kept having to go up and put dummy back in but once she found her thumb this wasn't an issue.

    Also by about 10 weeks old she had moved her bedtime to 6pm herself and I reduced her bath to twice a week as her skin was drying quite badly.

    If you're doing a routine you need to stick to it as much as possible and be consistant. My lo took about a fortnight to begin settling no problem and now at 9 months goes down like a dream.

    Good luck.
  • Am really interested in the replies, just thinking about same thing with our lo who is just over 6 weeks old. She not so bad after 11ish, she will settle herself. But between 7 & 11 she is wide awake. I know this is common for babies but just wondered how you got round this? We started at 6:30 tonight with top and tail, change for bed and feed, come 7:30 she was wide awake and alert. Not sure whether to go with this or try a different tack. In the end we just let her sit up and watch us and then she went down at 8:30 when she started to grizzle. She grizzled on and off till 10 with dummy and now due her feed.

    We tried the moses basket upstairs but we just up and down so now we decided to keep her down with us, then we will all go up for 10 oclock feed.
  • Beemonkey - maybe start her routine about 9pm or even 10? You can then move her backwards, 15 mins/30 mins at a time once she has settled in?

    That way she'll be more tired, and should start to go down quicker than trying to get her into the basket when she wants to play x
  • Beemonkey- I would say persevere with the basket upstairs (think of the exercise) as if you take lo back down they won't learn to settle alone upstairs. I found a must for us is a musical star light projector thing; we set it to play for 10 minutes and she loved it and I think it mesmerised her to sleep. It wasn't for long that we needed to keep going back up to resettle and each day we needed to go up to her less and less. As I said I think consistency is important so as not to confuse, even at 6 weeks old I'm sure they learn crying equals mum & dad and so will cry as they want to be with you. I always knew I didn't want lo like this as my two nephews at 9 years old & 5 years old now still refuse to go to bed till my sister does even if it's 2am and won't sleep in their room they sleep on her floor. My sister never put a bedtime routine in place and I think she regrets it now.
  • I'm so glad someone asked this - my lo is a bit younger so i understand routine is a bit out of question but we have been having awful time of things with colic/extreme wind and tummy problems and now on different comfort milk and infant gavisgon feel like i need to try getting eve and night sorted a bit as we dont have a seperate bedroom for baby like did with previous lo he is in our room so as so unsettled hubby sleeping on sofa which isnt good!

    he has been having a feed about 5/5.30 then he is awake gets tired about 7ish but only dozing if in my arms otherwise very upset... so as trying to get 2 year old ready for bed i just try to keep him from not crying etc... then he is awake so i have tried bathing at 8ish then bottle and he is obviously a bit sleepy as will look it whilst feeding and bit after but he soon wakes up if i even move and then he is awake till gone 11pm - i think he must be overtired by then as awake over 6 hours and also by the time he goes off either my arms or in basket my putting or holding dummy in for what seems like ever... he is getting close to next feed but as we know he doesnt settle after we dont dare trying to top him up he barely dare to move... so after an exhausting evening we take basket up and i go sleep then he will wake 1am ish have bottle but then i struggle to gte him off, he starts grunting/winging/crying i try leaving him, rockling, patting, putting dummy in, re-trying to wind, in the end i have him in bed with me as im so tired i just wana cry... then by time i get back off with him in arms its nearly time for his next bottle - he wakes around 3.30/4 then again cannot get him off then 2 year old wakes 6ish and so im up and just feel like a zombie and cant function....

    my question is WHAT CAN I DO TO HELP THIS................................??????PLEASE HELP?!!!

    Every morning i think right what can i try tonight... and its driving me mad! i undertstand lo's this young are usually wakeful in evening and unsettled but its the fact that he just doesnt settle and then in night wont either - even if he would feed in night then go back off that would be fab as hubby could be back in our room and i would get some sleep between feeds!

    Tonight thought i should try giving feed 5ish then perhaps try top up at 7.30ish then bath him bit later at 8.30/9 if can then feed at 9.30 then try and lay him down upstairs and see what happens... then he would want feed 1.30ish then 4ish im thinking

    xxxxx
  • Star11 have you tried swaddling?

    I am a massive fan of swaddling. I used to work in SCBU in Australia and ALL the babies in cots were swaddled there and it made them much more relaxed.

    I have also swaddled my own lo and he is now nearly 6 months and still swaddled for daytime naps.

    If you want some advice on the best way to do it let me know - it is possible to still swaddle even if the baby like to lie with arms up.

    Kx
  • i agree have you tried swaddling ? My lo hated swaddling at first then around 3 weeks old loved it and then around 6 weeks old hated it again but loved being in a sleeping bag. If you go on youtube there are lots of videos on there showing you how to swaddle.

    How are his daytime naps ? Strange as it sounds but the more sleep the baby gets in the day the better they snooze at night time. If your lo can get good daytime naps may stop the overtiredness which can stop them snoozing comfortably at night.
    My lo never had colic so I cant really comment but ive heard that it is usually worse in the evenings, so hopefully once that improves so will your evening.

    Have you tried putting lo to bed in the evening upstairs in the quiet and alone ? Maybe lo is used to the "buzz" of downstairs so it stops him from going into a deep sleep ??
  • hi ladies

    thanks for your responses, we are going to start tonight with a bath a 9, as last night he was wide awake watching the tv until then, and going to try and put him upstairs in his moses instead of him being downstairs with us.
    will let you know how we get on.

    sarah
  • anyone bf'ing looking at a routine yet?
  • My LO is now a year old. I exclusively BF her from birth until 5 months and started a routine on Day 3 (she spent the first few days in an incubator). My belief is that babies like routine, it makes them feel secure.

    However routine does NOT mean letting them scream for a feed or leaving a baby to scream in its cot because the routine says it's bedtime. There is always flexibility for each individual baby. I found the evening routine difficult for the first few weeks as my supply got worse during the evening and Abby used to suckle and suckle without getting full and getting more and more tired. I introduced a bottle of EBM at 7pm at about 3/4 weeks and that really helped her settle. My evening routine at that stage was:

    6pm - BF
    Followed by bath, massage/cuddle, dress,
    Bottle of EBM

    I used to then put her down in her moses basket in the bedroom and sit on the floor beside her and rest my hand on her chest and "shush" her until she dropped off. The first few times it took up to an hour or so but it did drop down to a few minutes. My OH and I used the "shush-pat" technique very successfully and my LO's bedtime routine is still very similar now (bottle, bath, brush teeth, story, bed). She has gone to sleep on her own now since a very early age (doesn't stop her waking in the night image ) and I put it down to a mixture of bedtime routine and "shush-pat" from an early age.

    I definitely believe babies should be put down for the night no later than 7pm (you can do a dreamfeed later) and this should be in a quiet, darkened room. If they really are wide awake then reduce the daytime naps.

    I hope that helps a bit. I found that a routine from an early age helped my supply, her sleeping and my sanity.

    H xx
  • thank you for replies and lillykitt jumping in on your post...

    tried swaddling - well think thats what been doing basically wrapping up tight but he has arms out as goes mad with them in - my mum then bough a swaddle thing were it has the velocro etc so easy... doesnt make any difference that i can see but he is easier to handle in night and suppose keeps him warm the i drap another blanket over top!

    i have now thought i'm going to try and go with flow in evening perhaps just trying bath and bottle when do toddler but i know he wont go down but suppose one day he may - lol! what i need to focus more on is nightime feeds - he wakes then basically i feed bottle and i cannot get him back off - after hours litrally then next bottle due... its making me feel ill that tired! also his timing is meaning he's having late ish feed then 1am then 4.30/5ish then my toddler wakes at 6am!

    does anyone else have problems getting there lo's off to sleep after feeds at night? also does anyone else resort to them sleeping in bed with them - this is what i have done last few nights - its awful because i dont really sleep, get dead arm, hubby sleeping on sofa!

  • i resorted to that last night after my failed attempt at a routine
  • Hi i agree with blondefriend with my wee girl she started going to bed at 7pm on her first night home(2days old) along with her 2 older brothers. It has worked really well and has always been a good night sleeper (although not so good in the day). Dont think it can be too early to start bedtime routine. dont know what i would have done without my evenings.x
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