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3yr age gaps

Hi ladies

My little girl is 14 months and my hubby thinks we should start trying to conceive baby no. 2 after xmas. I'm not sure as I've really struggled to cope with my little girl and still find most days difficult. It just seems that from the moment she wakes up to going to bed she cries. Anyway I would like another as I don't want her to be an only child but ideally would want a 3year or bigger age gap. My worry is that if I went for a larger age gap the children wouldn't grow up close. So my question is for those of you who have a 3yr or more age gap are your children close. (Sorry for going on)




  • Hi Danielle.
    I am in exactly the same situation! My lo is also 14 months and dh wants to try in the new year.
    My reason is that i want to keep my baby, my baby for as long as possible if you know what I mean.
    Admittedly thought the older she gets the better she gets and I can't imagine going through it all again just yet!

    Saying that, there is 2 years and nine months between me and my sister and we were always great play mates growing up. Don't get me wrong, we also fought like cat and dog (not physically!) but we are very close now.

  • I have 3 years 5 months between my dd and ds and then the twins are 3 years 2 months younger again. It's too early to tell with the babies obv but my dd and ds adore each other,they fight like cat and dog but there is a really close bond. A 3 year gap was perfect for us as by the time the baby came along the 3 yr old was toilet trained,could dress themselves and understand why tea might be a bit late etc. xx
  • between my eldest 2 there is 23 months and i found this gap such a doddle, i was expecting it to be really difficult but it was a breeze, i then waited 5 and half years for next one, and i found this age gap really tough, i had gone from having 2 children that could do a lot for themselves to having to deal with a demanding baby again, my eldest who was 7 at the time (9 now) doted on her baby bro, but now he is a toddler he just annoys her, but on the other hand my son who was 5 and half wasn't the slightest bit interested in the baby part, but once lo could walk he was there to play, the relationship between my younger 2 is fantastic but it has only recently occured. i am now expecting number 4 and my lo will be 27 months when this one is born, i was certain though that if i hadn't conceived by the time he was 2 i wouldn't have anymore. in my opinion the smaller the age gap the better to cope. the only thing with 2 younger ones is you have to start a routine from day one a stick to it, there is no short cuts and everything has to be by the book
  • there is 3 years and 2 months between my girls, they are 4.5 and 18 months and they get on great, they really adore each other. i think that its a fab age gap as you dont have 2 babies and each child gets plenty of individual attenision, but they are still close enough in age to play together. there was 3.5 years between me and my sister next down from me ( there are 5 of us in all) and we always played together as children. xx
  • There's 4 years between my 2 boys, who are now nearly 5 and 10 months. I would have liked a slightly smaller age gap but it just worked out that way. I'm really pleased with this age gap now though, they're really close and play together. When ds2 was born ds1 was potty trained, out of the cot and push chair, could feed himself etc which was easier. When we pick ds1 up from school they're always really pleased to see each other. I've not had a smaller gap so cant really comment on that. I think all age gaps have they're pros and cons though. There's 3 years between me and my sister and we've always been close.
  • there is 3yrs 7mths between my 2 and they r really close. i found it a nice age as dd1 was more independent when dd2 arrived. dd1 was at pre school 3 mornings, could dress herself, toilet trained etc, and now if they both want the same toy dd1 is old enough to understand that they share and not argue.
    i think there are positives and negatives to all age gaps but its what works best for u as a family. xxx
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