Its all just a big mess :(

Me and OH have split up...for good this time. i am currently getting 35 a week child benefit and he reckons he ios only gonna give me ??40 a week. he has two children with me!! This is just a joke.

I am supposed to be paying roughly ??300 of bils before xmas and gotta finish xmas shopping, and buy food and nappies for my boys. its all just a big mess. i dont know what to do

I've phone up to claim for benefits and its gonna take roughly 6 weeks to sort out. And they wont give me a crisi loan as they dont see it as an emergency.

He wont give me no money towards the bills. I literally have ??100 to my name. I cant delay paying the bills cos i am on the delayed payment now. i am so upset. i just dont know what to do!! :cry:

Posts

  • i tried to reply but it wont let me so here goes again, have you any family who could help you out with cash till after christmas? your ex sounds like a shit if you dont mind me saying! hope you get it sorted. x
  • i tried to reply but it wont let me so here goes again, have you any family who could help you out with cash till after christmas? your ex sounds like a shit if you dont mind me saying! hope you get it sorted. x
  • No no one can help me. my mam is totally skint and my dad is struggling him self as he doesnt work and he has two younger boys. i just dunno wot to do
  • sorry multi - post

    xx

    [Modified by: hedgie on December 08, 2008 09:21 PM]

  • Hello hun,

    Okay first you are doing well, better than well you are doing great. ((((Virtual kick in tushie - for your oh))) It's awful going through this, my dh left in September, and I hate to say this I am still struggling to get the benefits properly in place. My dh claimed the child benefit and refuses to give it up... they insist they think he has the kids... we haven't seen him since he left image... anyhow never mind me, you can do this, and you are doing this so don't beat yourself up. Can you ask your bank for a temporary overdraft? Or apply for a credit card... not ideal, but I've had to do both... here's hoping the benefit people finally come through.. Also I gave both the water and british gas a call and told them I could pay and they said send us a fiver and we'll acknowledge it as trying... so I did that twice before I was able to pay it off entirely. I'm sorry you are in such a rotten situation. Best wishes, let us know how you are image

    xx
  • Hello hun,

    Okay first you are doing well, better than well you are doing great. ((((Virtual kick in tushie - for your oh))) It's awful going through this, my dh left in September, and I hate to say this I am still struggling to get the benefits properly in place. My dh claimed the child benefit and refuses to give it up... they insist they think he has the kids... we haven't seen him since he left image... anyhow never mind me, you can do this, and you are doing this so don't beat yourself up. Can you ask your bank for a temporary overdraft? Or apply for a credit card... not ideal, but I've had to do both... here's hoping the benefit people finally come through.. Also I gave both the water and british gas a call and told them I couldn't pay and they said send us a fiver and we'll acknowledge it as trying... so I did that twice before I was able to pay it off entirely. I'm sorry you are in such a rotten situation. Best wishes, let us know how you are image

    xx

    [Modified by: hedgie on December 08, 2008 09:19 PM]

  • oh darling i was in your situ 10 years ago, like hedgie, fisrst thing get all your direct debit payments stopped (this is a temp measure) 2nd get metres installed or ask for payment booklets that way you'l avoid bank charges. 2nd council tax!! your at least entitled to a 25% reduction for being the only adult. tell them you wont be making any more payments until they have sorted the discount. main point is put food on the table sod the bills and ring the EFFING CSA on his ass. xx
  • Oh hun, what an awful situation to be in! I don't really have any constructive advice but didn't want to r&r. Hugs, hope you can get it all sorted. xxx
  • Yep ring CSA,and if you say your struggling to pay your bills then you may be able to sort something out with them,ie paying so much a week ect....
    Are you paying a mortgage?if so you could see about taking a payment holiday!
    Im not sure what benefits your claiming,but if its IS you will not need to pay any council tax and will get help with rent,also as a single parent you should recieve sure start vouchers to help with milk,veg etc...
    Im a single parent who gets nothing from ex..hes currently out of work,it is tough but there is help out there so best thing to do is go job centre and find out just what you can claim for...
    Your ex needs to realise he should be helping out more for his two children!good luck hun
  • Yep ring CSA,and if you say your struggling to pay your bills then you may be able to sort something out with them,ie paying so much a week ect....
    Are you paying a mortgage?if so you could see about taking a payment holiday!
    Im not sure what benefits your claiming,but if its IS you will not need to pay any council tax and will get help with rent,also as a single parent you should recieve sure start vouchers to help with milk,veg etc...
    Im a single parent who gets nothing from ex..hes currently out of work,it is tough but there is help out there so best thing to do is go job centre and find out just what you can claim for...
    Your ex needs to realise he should be helping out more for his two children!good luck hun
  • Yep ring CSA,and if you say your struggling to pay your bills then you may be able to sort something out with them,ie paying so much a week ect....
    Are you paying a mortgage?if so you could see about taking a payment holiday!
    Im not sure what benefits your claiming,but if its IS you will not need to pay any council tax and will get help with rent,also as a single parent you should recieve sure start vouchers to help with milk,veg etc...
    Im a single parent who gets nothing from ex..hes currently out of work,it is tough but there is help out there so best thing to do is go job centre and find out just what you can claim for...
    Your ex needs to realise he should be helping out more for his two children!good luck hun
  • Bloody computer playing up so excuse several posts lol
  • Oooh, yes and try seeing your gp and housing benefits people...

    I went to see housing benefits people and they are the ones who strangely sorting out the child benefit for me, even though I'm only eligible for 8 pounds a week towards my rent, the support they have offered has been great. The gp can help set up various different things too. It was my gp who tried setting up the sure start vouchers for me. I'm unfortunately not eligible but it would be well worthwhile. Also your gp can apply for you to be sent a NHS Tax Credit Exemption Certificate for after your mat one runs out if you are on low income... I think this can also be sorted through the tax credit people.

    xx

  • Oooh, yes and try seeing your gp and housing benefits people...

    I went to see housing benefits people and they are the ones who strangely sorting out the child benefit for me, even though I'm only eligible for 8 pounds a week towards my rent, the support they have offered has been great. The gp can help set up various different things too. It was my gp who tried setting up the sure start vouchers for me. I'm unfortunately not eligible but it would be well worthwhile. Also your gp can apply for you to be sent a NHS Tax Credit Exemption Certificate for after your mat one runs out if you are on low income... I think this can also be sorted through the tax credit people.

    xx

  • Thanks for all ur replies.

    I was on benefits before as he is incapacity benefit so our rent was paid anyway. I am a full time student. So i know my rent and council tax r free. he is now workin gon the fiddle, so if i go to csa i'll only get a tenner a week. Its just rubbish. I should grass his really but he is my boys dad.

    He's offered to pay my huge leccy bill at the end of the month (how kind) so that ok. but can i trust him to pay it?? xxx

    [Modified by: 2peez~in~a~pod on December 10, 2008 08:54 AM]

  • hi, my sons dad my ex doesnt pay anything towards him but i know he works on the fiddle like ur ex does i would report him, lucky enough i dont need anything from him as my OH works n supports his daughter n my son, but try not panic, when u say u are a full time student is it a higher level cos if so i got grants n loans from divert.gov student local grants n apply from childcare which all should be paid for, hope it all works out ok. csa have a calculator that works out how much #40 is average for 1 child, but tell him #80 obviously dependant on what he earns n say otherwise you could report its risky as i dont know what ur ex is like but mine was a voilent a88e so i didnt do it. I wish u all the best, things will get better hun xxx take care xx
  • I saw something on gmtv where money expert martin lewis said that electricity and gas companies have to help people who cant pay.
    this is his website http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/

  • I saw something on gmtv where money expert martin lewis said that electricity and gas companies have to help people who cant pay.
    this is his website http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/

Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions

Promoted Content