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Being frowned upon

Does anyone else feel fed up with being judged for being a working mum?

I have a just 4yr old and had to go back to work when she was 7 months due to me being the main earner and having a mortgage to pay etc. I have to do full-time to pay the bills. I have to work with loads of mothers who are separating from their husbands and are having to consider going back to work. I don't tell them I have a child and another o the way but am constantly being told that they can't possibly work until their children reach middle school age and to do so would harm them and they would be bad mothers.

Many of those people who know I am having a second baby have assumed I will stop work altogether when I have 2 to look after and I cannot possibly work full-time and be a mother of two.

I am sick of it. I tried to enroll on an NCT antenatal course for second time mums today only to be told that they hold the sessions on a Thursday just after lunch. I can't make it as I have to work. The course for first time mums offers sessions in the evening. Again its like the NCT are assuming that because I have one child already I must by staying at home and free during the day. I thought the NCT was supposed to be for everybody, not just those people who are lucky enough to have husbands/partners who earn enough to allow them to stay at home.

I cherish every minute I get with my child. She was exclusively breastfed for a whole year despie me going back to work when she was 7 months which took a lot of commitment and reorganisation at work. I am there for her 100% every evening and weekend. I have been away from her for only 2 nights. I do all my housework and ironing / telephone calls etc when she has gone to bed. I don't have local family who can help out or lend a hand. Our time is for playing and cuddles. That's why I'm still up at 11.20pm each night despite having to get up at 6am!

I am upsetting myself now thinking about their comments and will stop. Some people just don't know how lucky they are. I would like to see how they would cope living my life for a week.


  • thanks. I would tell them to bog off but unfortunately, most of the ones with attitude are actual clients and I might get the sack! Hey, then I'd be one of THEMimage
  • I agree with emmalou, you should be so proud of yourself! You are providing for your family & setting a wonderful example for them as well as being a fantastic mother by the sounds of it! I have two children but i only work part time because, being a single mum, i just cant afford full time childcare! You honestly sound brilliant, i couldn't do what you are doing everyday! Sounds like your clients couldnt either! You can work and be a great mum, that's not a bad thing! X x
  • im lucky in my job i work with lots of moms who have left their kids to go to work and we support each other and it works well. we all get on tell each other how its ok to work and we can have a better life coz we work its all good support and im happy at work.
    i think its hard work to be a mom and have a job but it can be doen and can get a bit frustrated when peole have the attitude that they frown on women who leave the kids you have to do whats best for your family and thats sometimes means leaving them.
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