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ocd and aspergers?

Hi I dont really know what to ask but was wondering if anyone here has a child with OCD and aspergers. My 5 year old is being referred to a lady who deals with behaviour problems in children (sorry I dont know her title hv was explaining her role to me) as dd1 has little obsessions (was obsevisve hadnwashing now certian things have to be done at certain times, has to see her hamster at 10 o clock!) and it was picked up about her handwashing when she was at nursery and i have noticed more about how gunienly upset she gets if she is not pre warned about things which are going to happen or if plans change unexpecdly. its not like she is being naughty she genuienly is heartbroken and worried.
anyway I was told to give it to the end of reception class to see if she outgrew it but she hasnt and i mentioned it to hv and she is referring her to see what the child behaviour lady thinks.
I should add she is a very very bright girl who can do adding and subtracting of numbers and can read with next to no problems so its not like she is being naughty and its effecting her school work.
does anyone know what might happen at the consultation wioth the child behaviour lady? or any other info please?


  • Hi,

    It does sound from what you have said that your little one does have some form of autism - and as she is really bright (well done you for raising such a good one!!) it sounds like Asperger's - this is classed as the 'high functioning' end of the autistic spectrum.

    I have a little boy (2) with Down's but am also a teacher and have recently been doing some voluntary work in a special school. Now obviously the children here are very severely affected by the condition - far more than your daughter seems to be - and they often have OCD tendencies along with it. In your daughter's case, as there has been no specific diagnosis and so I presume no support put in place for her, it is possible that the OCD is her way of gaining some control - in a world that (through no fault of anyone around her) was simply not structured enough for her, and she was unsure of what was coming next. What I have found with the children I have worked with is that if their condition is recognised then they can be given ways of controlling it - for example, I work with a little boy who has been assessed as having one of the worst cases of OCD in the south west!! He is given boundaries for each of his little obsessions - e.g. he has to touch everything - lights/ hair, tables, you name it! His OCD is controlled by telling him he has 'one more touch' and then it has to stop - and for him, that works, he knows just once more and then he has to move on.

    You know your little one best and you need to push for some support at school for her - speak to your school's special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) about what the behaviour specialist says - you should be able to get some support for her in the classroom. It doesn't need to be anything major, just someone that can be around to whisper things in her ear to help her to cope with day-to-day situations and not let anything get out of hand! Things that, with the best will in the world, a teacher with a class of 30 can't always do!!

    Sarah x
  • Thanks for the reply. we havent had the referal come through yet but will update when we have. Luckliy her class is of only 19 people but i keep thining of years ahead when she goes into a middle school (she is in a small village school at mo buit they move up intpo a middle shcool which has about 3 or 4 villiage first schools combined) but thats not happening yet.]thanks again for your words and if the behaviour speacialist agrees I will definatly push for help.
    As you can tell from my spelling she doesn't get her brightness from me and really shocked us when she could spell and write her own name at 3 years old!
    im very proud of her as she is very bright but this seems to be getting in the way of her life! she is the most lovely little girl in the world.
    its been really nice talking to someone who knows something about what i mean.
    can i ask (i hope you dont mind) how will i cope if she is diagnosed with autisum?? i know she is still my little girl and it wont change my love for her at all but how do i deal with people-telling them and stuff? my mum hasnt been the most supportive about seeing the specialist-telling me she doesnt need to see someone shes fine,look at her blah blah blah!!
    other than this situation,my mum is very supportive.
  • Hi wannababy, my son is 3 1/2 now, he has been under the care of the paed since he was 17 months old, he is being assessed for ASD but they say he is too young to diagnose, he has a lot of autistic traits and also has sensory processing disorders which apparantly are linked with ASD, also hypermobile joint syndrome, it is a rollercoaster journey and you do wonder how you will cope, but you just will, I go on another site called ADS friendly, it is very good and full of people who are in the same situation as you here is the link
  • Don't worry about coping if she is diagnosed - you will at last have something definite to work with, you can do a lot of research and you will be able to put things in place at home (and school) that will help both you and her. Once you know what you are dealing with, you can also search out people and organisations to help - and you must take absolutely EVERYTHING that is offered!
    I hope that your family can be supportive - autism is a difficult one because the child 'looks' normal and that's why other people see them as just naughty children! But you know what her difficulties are and you have to simply ignore anything that other people say or do - it is simply their ignorance, often through no fault of their own. Good luck and keep us posted!

    S x

  • I hope that your family can be supportive - autism is a difficult one because the child 'looks' normal and that's why other people see them as just naughty children! But you know what her difficulties are and you have to simply ignore anything that other people say or do - it is simply their ignorance, often through no fault of their own. Good luck and keep us posted!

    S x

    I know that one, the amount of looks I get when Isaac is having total meltdown in town because of something little, I have even been told by total strangers in the past that what he needs is a good slap image Sadly my parents are not much help either, they refuse to accept anything is wrong and tell me its all for attention because he is the youngest of 4. I am past the stage of caring what others think now though, at the end of the day, he is my little boy and I love and adore him just as he is, I wouldnt change him for the world ;\)
  • Well said Hayley!!!! YOU know that YOU are doing the best for YOUR child and that is all that matters!!!
  • thanks so much for your such kind words. hv also said exactly what you have both said- i know her best and i am doing what i think is best for her (i pre warn her about EVERYTHIN to try and minimise the meltdowns!! but wasnt sure if i was making matters worse for the times when things dont go to plan iyswim??!)
    thanks again and i am just hoping they hurry up with the referral although having worked in healthcare for 7 years i know things take a while!!
  • You are doing everything you can and you are clearly doing a great job, I know what you mean about pre warning, sometimes it works for us and at other times it causes more problems, especially when things dont go exactly as they should xxx
  • thank you so much for all your help. we now have the appointment through and its for this monday! im super nervous and so worried the lady we are seeing wont beilive what im saying and i know im going to end up upset! but its a step forward by getting the appointment. I will let you all know how it goes.
    I spoke to her teacher, and she said she is in her own world sometimes but not that that alone would make her concernred but year 1 is VERY structured and she now thinks thats why she has settled into it so easily as their routine NEVER chnages there. she said she does spend longer washing her hands than the other children-but this has always been her "little thing". her teacher said she doesnt "follow the crowd"-she will do what she is doing,but she does seem to get frustrated if her teacher asks the class to sit down and another children doesnt do it (she thinks of everything said to her as a rule to be abided by!)
    so anyway enough talking from me-will update monday evening x
  • My son is nearly 12 and has shown autistic spectrum signs since he was small. No one knew what it was at first and I had it blamed on me being a single mum, not controlling him etc but it has always been more than that. He finally had an assessment last year and it was inconclusive. The lady decided that he was not bad enough for his education to be affected and therefore it was not a concern for the school and I should take him to the GP if I wanted an investigation / diagnosis for our own benefit. Several people all of whom have or work with children with Aspergers have politely said that they think he has it because he is so like their children / charges.He has always been a sqare peg in a round hole and can be very obsessive and ritualistic. Changes in his routine can upset him if he is not prepared. I have had to explain about our forthcoming trip away - where we will stay, what there is there etc whereas I never needed anything like that as a kid, I just went where I was taken really. He didn't respond to the usual sanctions at little school because things such as stickers or stars didn't mean anything to him and even now he can be very difficult to get through to at times. His eating is very limited and he needs to have his time and things organised for him or there's chaos! People think I baby him and criticise because I get his clothes ready and tell him to eat breakfast, do teeth, he needs a bath, check homework book etc but the stress of leaving him to his own devices is awful. I have found that since I read up on ASD and began treating him as though he has it he has been much calmer and easier to manage in general and with it much happier. I'm still undecided about going for a diagnosis because it may be good in that he would get consideration at school that he doesn't get at the moment but would a "label" stigmatise him later in life? I love my son to bits and accept him as he is complete with his unusual ways but it is upsetting at times that he is unlikely to ever really fit in with Mr Average. This is probably not much help is it? I just watned to share our journey so far I suppose. The assessment that took place at school involved watching him and seeing how he got on with tasks, interacted with others, behaviours displayed and such. It is probably better to get it addressed earlier rather than leave it if you can. But ASD children are wonderful and special despite the bad press they get.

    [Modified by: peanuts77 on October 23, 2010 09:03 PM]

  • Thank you for sharing your story with me. I had the appointmwnt with the behaviuor doctor and she beilives dd1 is on the autstic spectrum but stressed she was diagnosing her that day. we are now awaiting an apppointment for the speecvh and language thearipst from the autistics team and someone else to get in contact for an appointment but i was told this wont be until about feb next year due to long waiting lists.
    I didnt end up up[set as i thought i would and i was so relived to be liustened too and the doctor was so nice and gave us some pointers in helping dd1 with everyday life.
    I have spoken to her teacher who said dd12 has all the knowledge but cant seem to get it out (her speech is fine its more of a communication problem) and she said she will keep me up to date with anything in school and i said i will keep her up to date with what happens at the hospitals appointments-her teacher is very nice and says not to worry about rushing her back to school after appointments ect
    i am finding at the moment that some days she just seems so into her own little world that she forgets about things that keep her safe-ie looking out for cars on the walk to school even though im right next to heer saying her name!
    I just take each day as it comes and as long as she is happy then a lable doesnt mean a thing image shes still my daughter who i wouldnt change for the world x
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