Feeling scared

Hey everyone, 

First post here.

My fiance and I are getting married in 3 months, and we decided to start trying for a baby next year.

I went off the pill last month (pharmacies were completely out of stock, and I thought it would be good to give my body a break since I've been on it for a few years)

I started getting hot flushes and headaches for about two weeks after, and booked in to get blood work done. My results showed that my FSH is 38, but everything else came back normal - estrogen included. This was a huge shock to us, as you can imagine. I'm 27 and never thought something like this would show up. I have an appointment next Tuesday to see a specialist, but my fiance and I are really worried about the outcome and waiting is the absolute worst, I can't stop stressing out.

We are talking about starting to try for a baby now instead of waiting, because of the fear that we are on a very strict timeline (if at all), but I'm also scared that we aren't ready yet either. I really don't know what I'm feeling or thinking right now. I just wanted to know if anyone else has gone through similar since I feel super alone, and wondering if ttc is the right path at this point. I couldn't forgive myself if we chose to wait and found out that we should have done something earlier. I'm also frustrated that being on the pill might have masked some cues that could have pointed me to an issue earlier.

I haven't had a period since going off the pill yet, and my hot flushes and headaches have gone away. 

Feeling really angry at the world, since my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer at the start of the year and now it feels like my chances of having my own family might be threatened too.. 

Would love to hear from anyone who has been in a similar situation or any advice would be so greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading.