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PCOS, miscarriage and fertility

I'm currently 34 years old, and I can recall as far back as being 17 years old and my mother having to take me to see a doctor because my period wasn't coming, and she didn't believe that I wasn't sexually active. I've struggled with PCOS for a very long time. Since getting married my husband and I have been trying to conceive for the past year and it's difficult to go through the fertility process. I've been on metformin for 4 years or so, and was getting my period regularly for some time. Since, my husband had his own issue where he could finish inside of me, we decided to go through the fertility clinic. I  was placed on Femara combined with Puregone injections because my ovaries weren't reacting to the Famara alone. Mind you that I still had to take my 1500mg of metformin as well. I felt dosed up and bloated constantly. So far,I have had 5 failed IUI and when my husband and I decided to take a break to try at home inseminations for 2 months, my period magically stopped coming even with the metformin, so back to the fertility clinic we go! I've never been more at odds with my body. I have never been over weight, but I've struggled with facial hair and acne...all the good stuff PCOS brings 🙄 I feel like my body (or should I say reproductive system) is constantly working against me and I can't reach inside to see what's happening to even change it. 

I have been feeling extremely defeated and alone. Friends are getting pregnant left and right, and despite my happiness for them, I feel such sadness for myself. I feel like I can't talk to them about what I'm truly going through because how could they truly understand? I also couldn't always talk to my husband without making him feel guilty somehow. I'm curious to know how many of you ladies felt this way during this process and what did you do? 
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