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having a hard time latley.....

sorry about to rant.........
I am having such a hard time with everything latley! this is our 3rd month of ttc, and feel that af is on her way. i am getting so frustrated the baby that we lost was our 3rd child all of which we concieved in the first month of ttc and now i looks like we are heading into month #4 (even though af hasnt got me yet but i feel shes on here way) not to mention i have gained 10lbs sence nov. which is alot for me as ive been the same weight sence i was 16yrs old.i cant fit it to anything and what i can fit into i look like a moose in............i cry all the time latley. my mother in law calls about every 2-3 weeks wondering if " we have any news yet" and month after month i have to tell her NO.im trying my hardest to keep a smile on my face everytime i see my gf who is due 1 week after i was with her glowing skin, cute baby bump and little girl in there kicking and rolling around, as she complains for hours about how bad her moning sickness is and how she hates "this" and here i sit with the last 3months of hell, 10 extra pounds i cant get rid of and nothing to show of our little baby but a piece of paper with our little beans scan picture on it. i just cant understand why things like this have to happen theres people out there that are horrible parents, take drugs through out thier preg and slap thier little ones around and i have to have my baby taken from me! why me and not them?? im so sick of hearing "everything happens for a reason" then what is the reason??!!! i would love to know!! then you hear smart remarks like "oh it will happen agian someday", "it was for the best im sure", "oh your young yet",arghhh do people actually think this stuff helps!! thanks for listening ladies

Replies

  • Hey Gussie,

    how you feeling today sweetie? Never apologise for ranting hun, this is a nice safe place to do it and it's something that you need to do to help the healing process.

    I'm not going to say the things above, but as your AF hasn't arrived yet, there is still a chance, and if not then see what happens the month after.

    I also put on weight after my mc, mine was down to me comforting eating after the mc.. I've no advice with how to get it off, but I do believe that when you're in a better frame of mind then you'll find it easier to get rid of.

    Sending you lots of hugs

    xxx
  • i think what you've written above most of us could have written word for word ourselves! Sorry to hear ur finding it so hard, we're now on month 7 (currently 2dpo) of ttc and fed up to the eye balls! Chin up though hun, maybe ur body just needed a bit more time to heal. i know mine certaily did! xx
  • I was going to say that! I feel exactly the same - especially the having conceived quickly 3 times before bit! Everyone said you're more fertile after mc so I fully expected to fall straight away image Plus I've been having periods nearly 30 years (yes I'm that old!) and they have been as regular as clockwork from day one - whenever I came off the pill and after each baby I had AF when it was expected straight away too. So after the mc I bled on day 23 (counting full on mc bleed as day 1) which was about right for me but noooooooooooo it was more joyful loss of 'products of conception' (seriously a man must have come up with that title!) and my proper AF was on day 32!!! So now although I had ov pains at weekend which would be about right I didn't get +ve opk and my temps haven't shown a proper rise so I don't know if I have ov or I will soon or not at all! It's all so frustrating RAAAAAHHHHH

    LOL and you thought you were alone in needing to rant ehimage
  • Ahh hun I hope your feeling a little better (((HUGS)))

    I know those things dont help, we had a whole thread in ltttc about things we hate people saying was good to get it all down!!

    Cant your tell mil that with all respect when your ready to tell her some news she'll be one of teh 1st to know. My family dont ask me they know were trying but wouldnt ask us as they know when were ready well tell them sort of tales the pressure off.

    Sending you huge hugs & always rant when you need to sometimes helps I hope it has helped you hun xx
  • Hi, Totally understand your rant. I would tell my MIL to mind her own business but I can be a cow at times.
    I had 2 mc's last year and heard all the "it happened for a reason" "At least you know you can get pregnant" "you should be thankful you have a lovely little girl" YES BUT I STILL LOST MY BABIES!!

    Sorry for taking over with my own rant.

    I am sending you big hugs and hoping you feel better.
    xx
  • Hmmmm, yes, I really hate the "it happened for a reason" rubbish too. What reason exactly? I also hate "it will happen when it is meant to happen" which is also total nonsense - just look at all the teenage pregnancies! We all down sometimes, don't feel you have to bottle it up - it's what we're here for!

    Also, feeling the mil pain. My mil now pointedly asks me "And how are you feeling?" every time we speak - very very annoying.

    Hope you are feeling better today.

    xxSara
  • SNAP!!!!!!!
    I am feeling miserable, I'm not coping at all and really resent people telling me whilst holding onto their baby kicking bump, that it's 'life's plan for me' and 'just pray' - all right for them to say with their happy, healthy, no hitch pregnancy, I've now lost 2 and believe me I have prayed with every breath I took and it did NOTHING, my babies are still not here! :,(
    I would definitely say something to your mil, depending on your relationship either something like 'i'm really sorry mil but I'm struggling to get a grip of my emotions and your constant questioning is really upsetting me, i promise I've got you on speed dial when I have the happy news to tell you please don't ask' or '@&!* off' lol, failing that get oh to take her to one side and sort it out.
    Aaaarrrggh!
  • thanks for your post ladies, helped to get it all down!
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