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Really Bad Night...

The first night with Lucas I was in hospital and was so lucky as he slept so well in his crib, and woke only after 8pm at 1 and then 5 to feed and then settled again straight away. First night home last night couldn't have been worse. We went up to bed at about 10.30, bad I know but in laws are here and we wanted them to be able spend as much time with him before they leave today, and I changed him then gave him a feed for about 20 mins and then tried to put him in his crib but he just started howling. He just would not settle without being on one of us, then kept trying to suckle. I tried to feed him again, but I clearly have nothing left and it's so sore now it makes me cry when he latches on and he just doesn't seem satisfied. It got so bad at around 3am that DH had to drive to Asda and buy formula and Lucas did have a little of that but not a lot and still won't settle without being held and he just screams as soon as he's put down. I couldn't cope in the end and hubby ended up in with his parents with Gran holding Lucas so we could get a couple of hours sleep. I feel like a complete failure already, as I don't think I can cope with the breast feeding plus it seems I'm not making enough for him anyway, and he won't sleep by himself and I'm too scared to sleep holding him. Sorry for the long post, but I'm desperate for some help and advice here ladies. Please help. I don't know if I can do this.


  • I have just posted such a similar thread re the breast feeding so I really understand where you are coming from. It is making me (and consequently Matilda) really anxious that I can't deliver the goods (so to speak!). I formula fed yesterday and think I am going to try and express my milk but continue bottle feeding (we get ourselves in a real panic with the positioning). Do NOT feel like you are a failure. I *think* the key for all of us is to find something that works for you and that you are comfortable with.

    He could have just had an unsettled night. I was in hospital for 2 nights and Matilda's first night was just like you described Lucas' first night. Second night was absolute opposite and she did not settle until 3am regardless of what I did and even then she would only go to sleep on me. Nights 3 and 4 seem to be a bit more consistent.

    I hope you all get some rest tonight and remember we are all here for a chat!

    K and Matilda x
  • Oh hun, didn't want to R&R but hope Lucas has settled down a bit. Rhea was so good for 1st week at home then was screaming the house down from 6pm til bout half 2 I felt like such a bad mum, & didn't know what to do. We thought it mite be colic as she wouldn't settle n her basket & like you was only calm when being held.

    We put her on some formula, which I was hoping not to do, but I was getting myself into such a state which wasn't helping anyone, & we have just increased from 2 3oz bottles up to 3 5oz bottles spaced through the day with breast inbetween.

    I hope you get some rest today & as kaycee says we are all here for a chat. I'm completely new to this whole baby thing, it's taking a lot of getting used too!!

    Jayne & Rhea xx
  • Renri & Kayecee I hope it helps to know that I'm only a coupole of days down the line ahead of you but the BF has improved unbelivably in the last 2-3 days so if you can grit your teeth through the pain, it does get easier I promise!

    Grace was such a hungry girl right from the start - I didn;t even have the first night of her sleeping as she feed for 1.5 hours as soon as she was born and then hourly for the first day and then that first night she fed non-stop from 8pm to 3am and my boobs were raw. Eventually the mw took her for a couple of hours so I could get some rest but she was soon hungry again and I ended up feeding her lying down whilst I dozed for the rest of that night.

    That was basically the pattern for the first 5 or 6 days, although the cluster feed was more 6pm-midnight once we were home. On Sunday (day 3) DH went and bought me some nipple sheilds and breast shells from mothercare which helped a little - especially the shells (just keeping my boobs exposed to the air and not chafing on my bra gave some relief between feeds) but on Tuesday (day 5) the pain was so horrific and she was still so hungry even though my milk had come in on day 3 that DH was determined to get her onto formula the next day.

    Anyway, before we had chance to get any formula, on day 6 one of my boobs started to feel a bit better and so even through the other one is still pretty sore it is such a relief to have at least half the feeds pain free. I'm on day 8 now and although my left boob is still cracked and sore, it has got better so that now it just hurts during the let down but then after that it's not too bad.

    Grace is still feeding as frequently but at my 4 day mw check she'd lost less than 5% of her birth weight so is obviously just a hungry girl! It's so strange for me as although I BF with DD1 she was the total opposite and struggled to regain her birthweight as she wasn't interested in feeding enough so I was stressed that time in a totally different way but the upside was she cause me no pain at all and was a very gentle feeder.

    whatever you do is going to be what's best for you and your own baby but I hope the fact that the end of the really hard part probably isn;t too far away might help you to persevere. You're definitely making enough milk - we just all have healthy hungry bubs and our poor boobs are still adapting!

    I'm going to start expressing next week to let DH to the evening feed in the hope that cuts back on the cluster feeding (apparently your milk isn't as rich on an evening which is why they want to feed more often). I'm also trying to introduce a dummy so that I can tell more easily if she just wants comfort/to suckle rather than an actual feed but so far she isn;t interested so I'm not forcing it in case it affects the BFing.

    Sorry this has ended up a bit of a ramble but I wanted you to know you're not alone as I felt exactly how you did a few days ago and I feel so much more positive about it all now.


    Feebs & Grace (8 days old)

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