Think I'm showing signs of pnd again
I was really worried all the way through this pregnancy that I'd suffer again but I think I might be. I've not been coping well at all and spend most of each day in tears. I've become really short tempered and feel awful and guilty as I keep shouting at Rhys over nothing. By the time Jay's home from work I honestly feel like I could just walk out to get away from it all. I spoke to the hv about it and she thinks I need to see my gp as I scored 16 on that test thing and she said the normal range is btw 6 & 8. Jay feels horrible as he just sees me so upset all the time and he just doesn't know how he can help me (neither do I lol)
Being second time round I should feel confident doing what I'm doing, but I question myself over everything and feel like I'm doing everything wrong. I don't think this was helped by the doc at the hospital making me feel like such a bad mummy by saying \i was overfeeding him and that's why he was being so sick (he was having 4-5 oz every 4-5hrs at 6 weeks) ordinarily I would have taken it with a pinch of salt but I really took it to heart.
I just want to be happy and enjoy being with my boys as having Alfie has really made me realise how fast it all goes as it doesn't seem 2 minutes ago that Rhys was this small.
Sorry for moaning on I just thought it might help to get it all out x
Being second time round I should feel confident doing what I'm doing, but I question myself over everything and feel like I'm doing everything wrong. I don't think this was helped by the doc at the hospital making me feel like such a bad mummy by saying \i was overfeeding him and that's why he was being so sick (he was having 4-5 oz every 4-5hrs at 6 weeks) ordinarily I would have taken it with a pinch of salt but I really took it to heart.
I just want to be happy and enjoy being with my boys as having Alfie has really made me realise how fast it all goes as it doesn't seem 2 minutes ago that Rhys was this small.
Sorry for moaning on I just thought it might help to get it all out x
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Replies
I think maybe when things calm down a bit you will feel better, it sounds to me like you havent stopped and need a bit of a rest and some sleep! Is there any way Jay or someone you trust can take the boys for a few hours to let you rest? If there is then why dont you see how you feel this time next week and if you dont feel any better then make an appointment to see the doctor?
It does sound like you may be getting PND although it could just be that you are doing too much. It seems to me you are doing a great job with the two boys. Perhaps you are feeling overwhelmed as youre expecting too much from yourself?
Liek the others said, if you can, try and take some time to chill, even if you cant get time on your own, have a duvet day with Rhys and just watch dvds.
Ive been feeling overwhelmed with just one child recently & I often end up shouting when i cant cope, which i hate doing! Try not to be too hard on yourself and go to docs if it carries on hun xx
It was a real shock to the system and it sounds like you've had lots more to cope with and its understandable that you are feeling the way you are. Take any offers of help while the opportunity is there and if you can have a day watching tv or listening to music and having cuddles - then it sounds like a good idea to me!
Moan to us any time you like and let us know how you're getting on!! big hugs xxx
BIG hugs x
Keep gettin your chill time and share on here if you're not coping too well, we all understand. x
I've had a lot of days where I have just wanted to scream and it is usually when I have had little sleep (due to Jacob normally!) and Bren is being a little monkey and I feel like everything is getting on top of me. I don't know the meaning of 'me' time anymore as any spare time I have is spent doing jobs to keep on top of everything. My 'luxury' thing to do is bake or do some more self stufy to learn Norwegian! It is hard work being a mummy to two, although very rewarding as well, and I imagine with the very slightest amount of pnd the whole thing can seem like too much.
I'm really glad you managed to talk to Jay about it and things have improved, fingers crossed they continue to do so but come and talk on here whenever you need to. xxxx
me to feel like doing everything wrong - question everything - im forever txting friends that have only just had first asking them questions and i feel so daft as they must think shes had one already!!!
i analise everything my mum says far too much and dont just enjoy the time - every morning i then go over the night before and what could i do different that day to try get it better....
the constant winging from mason - to be fare is a hppy little boy now but wants attention and with fin and house etc just dont fell have got the time to give properly!!!
i started snapping at finlay - i never ever usedto shout etc so then he would look sooo scared and sob is heart out and then i got more stressed as maon would start!
anyway sorry for ramble just wanted to say i have been there not so long ago and i was honest with hv which was actually a good thing rather than pretending - they did noithing apart from keep in contact with me! i scored 11 first time round then 14 at about 10 weeks!
did you have medication with rhys??? if so do get to docs and see what they say as the sooner you can get on top of it the better!!!
but my god it is hard work with 2...........................!!!
is alfie good? do you get much sleep?
I was on medication for a few months after having rhys.I've decided to go on tuesday to speak to the doc. I'd been doing really well, hv came back and said I seemed like a different person etc and then out of nowhere I just felt like I went really down again and had a bad few days. Alfie was off the other day and pretty whingy all evening and I just couldn't cope with it and ended up sat outside in the garden in the rain for about an hour bawling my eyes out (jay was home I didn't just abandon the boys)
I'm just really thankful that I have a lot of support both on here and in real life x
Hugs x
xxx