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bottle stopping & other bits!

Im having a proper bad week so I hope i dont go on a rant here! Need some advice about a few issues if you ladies wouldnt mind :\)
Well ive just attempted to put Elijah down for his nap & hes bitten the teat off yet another bottle. I was going to stop the bottles next week anyway, so i guess im just going to have to stop them now instead as i have no more bottles or teats :roll:

Usually he has one bottle for his afternoon nap & one at bedtime. He uses it as a dummy to fall asleep, so im not looking forward to this!
Ive already bought a substitute cup which he doesnt seem interested in. I dont know how to go about it.
Hes not asleep yet, so im trying to just put him back every 5-10 mins with the drink next to him which he isnt touching.
Im assuming this isnt going to work & he wont nap today, but what about tonight? Shall I give him a drink before bed or encourage him to use the new cup in place of bottle? Shall I just keep putting him back? Let him cry it out? For how long etc?
Im usually good at sorting it all out but my head is all over the place today due to severe pollen & sun allergies/anti.d's being upped :\?

Also, he has been really rough for about a week now, biting, not listening AT ALL. Im not sure what an effective punishment is? I put him in his room with the gate locked earlier for 2 mins & that went ok. We aslo do a star chart for good behaviour. Im partly blaming myself as im usually really patient, but this week cannot handle anything at all, just shouting & feeling really stressed :\(

Just remembered that I wanted to also ask about bedtime/big boy bed. Hes been in his for a few weeks now but when we put him to bed he still gets up at least 3 times before he will settle down. Dont know how to stop this??

Any advice would be appreciated, sorry if its a bit of a muddle xx


[Modified by: bluey on 20 April 2010 13:23:38 ]

Replies

  • Can totally understand that when you're not feeling 100% being a mummy feels like an impossible job!

    If it were me I'd start a bedtime routine, what ever works for you - something like getting his PJ's on singing calming song eg. 'teddy bear teddy bear' a few stories in his room where it's quiet and then to bed. When he keeps getting up no eye contact just say 'no it's bed time nightnight' the first time and then nothing the next time/s just gently put him back to bed. (this is very super nanny approarch but I like Jo Frost, use most of her advice and it seems to work).

    Hopefully this routine will then tell him it's bedtime rather than the bottle.

    One other thought, you are taking away a comfort in his bed for him. Maybe it would be a good idea for you or him to choose somethimng new. A cuddly toy, night light etc
  • We still use bottles although they're still intact so I'm not sure what to suggest really. Maybe having it slightly earlier as a warm milk treat with bedtime story might work? I like the idea of choosing a replacement 'comforter' type thing.
    As for the rough stage- again we're not really having that but I tend to just yell 'no' and tell him to be gentle- he then hangs head in shame lol! I also love supernanny and would say the naughty spot looks like a great idea. I think someone mentioned before there's a risk of making the bedroom a bad place if used in punishment?

    Good luck, being a mum is hard work at the best of times let alone when you're not on top form!
  • Well it all seems to be going quite well so far!
    On the first night Elijah took an hour and a half to get to sleep, but he was really trying, just so used to sucking on his bottle! We put all his bottles in a bag the night before and hung them on the door for the 'babies' to collect. Lol. Then hubby bought him a musical gloworm to go in the bag for the morning. He was so happy with the gloworm & it seems to be helping him to get to sleep!
    As far as naps go, i had to lay with him yesterday but it was only for 10 mins.
    Then last night it only took him 1/2 hour to go off.
    He's asked for a bottle but hasnt been upset or anything, which i was sure would happen. All going well so far! Thanks for advice xx
  • Wow fantastic, I like the glow worm - where's that from?
  • And hes napping at the moment too! Phew.
    Gloworm is from Asda El, was just under ??10 i think, he loves it so much. Yesterday in bed he was saying 'clever gloworm' and kissing its face lol
  • Thanks will have a look, might try swopping that for Oakley's dummies
  • How are things going? Hope all is going well and that you are feeling slightly less stressed!! xxx
  • How's everything going? Rhys has a gloworm he got it when he was born and snuggles it everynight.
    Rhys has also jone extremly boisterous and doesn't listen at all at the moment. He's just turned wild though thankfully he's stopped his phase of hitting and biting me we had when Alfie was first born.
  • Glad it is going well Bluey, the glow worm idea sounds fab! I may pinch it too as I am planning on ditching Brendans and Jacobs dummies during the summer hols when hopefully we can keep them busy so they won't notice it too much! I'm not looking forward to it!

    With Elijahs behaviour - could it be linked to you feeling rough and being in a bad mood? I think they pick up on more than we realise sometimes and I have noticed when I am tired and am short with Bren his behaviour seems to get worse. If I make more time to listen to him and stay calm when he is naughty I see much better results. Not always easy though, especially when you are feeling awful.

    Any updates on the tests they were doing to find out what may be wrong with you? Hope you are having a better day today xxx
  • sounds like things are going very well sweetie!we use bottle first thing in morning as fin wakes between 5.30 and 6 and it keeps him quite if mason asleep.... he then has a bottle at night - but its very casual and he has his pjs on after bath and sits on sofa woth us and mason and they both have some milk and then fin says bed and hubby carries him up - thank god!!!

    the last 2 weeks i decided fin was having his dumy FAR too much - my fault as i would just hand it to him even when didnt ask as i was stressed etc and if out as didnt want him to winge!!! so 2 weeks ago one random day i took it off him at breakie and then just said nap time every time he asked for it - so then at nap he had his dummy and elephant and then when up took it and said bedtime you can have it back and we have just carried on every day and its fine!!!!

  • Thanks everyone.
    Well the bed thing and no bottle has gone great really, We've had no crying (I am amazed, I only put it off for this long as I thought it would be a major stress & upset for him!) & he just loves his gloworm, so all good on that front image
    I'm relieved he doesnt have a bottle anymore as it was constant & I was worried about his teeth too.

    Liz- his behaviour im definetely sure was linked to me being stressed/depressed/unwell, yes. And also, lack of daddy time what with new job/our stepson staying more.
    He still keeps biting from time to time but we are nipping it in the bud with star chart for good behaviour & in his room for 2 mins for bad behaviour after a warning.

    Regarding hospital, I have to wait until 1st june to even discuss test results with my consultant, so the wait is getting me down slightly. No chance of earlier appointment either.
    Doc has upped my anti d's but i dont think they seem to be working at all lately. Very unmotivated and fed up alot of the time, think this is also due to me & hubby both being worried about money at the mo, until his new wages settle down & we catch up with ourselves.

    But I am really trying to stick to the behaviour routine so that it works. Not always able to be totally unstressed though! xx
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