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Just been told formula is harmful. GRRRRR

I am so upset and angry so apologise for the rant but i need to get it down

Fin is/was tongue tied and has just had it snipped. Now he is fine and is feeding so all is good there but the women who did it has made me really cross.

We had made the choice for him to have it done so what she said didn't sway us but i am sure that it is wrong

she basicaaly said that if he didn't have it cut i may give him formula and that would be reaaly bad as formula is harmful. surely this is not true.

I am so upset. last night we gave fin formula at bed time and he was much happier after it but now i feel awful for doing it. it took me long enough to stop feeling guilty even before she sais that.

now i can't stop crying. i am upset that i just put my baby through that (even tho he is fine and it was a minor thing) and so so angry at this lady.

there is way too much pressure tp breast feed and to say formula is harmful is a horrid thing to say.

:x :x :x

Replies

  • Oh for GOD'S SAKE! If it was so bloody 'harmful' they wouldn't be allowed to sell it to be fed to infants.

    I don't think anyone denies the evidence that breast milk is better for babies. However, we don't live in a perfect world, and sometimes it's not possible or desirable for a mother to breastfeed. We live in a country where feeding formula is a safe, hygienic and sane solution when breastmilk isn't available or breastfeeding is difficult. It's a perfectly valid way of feeding your child and whilst exclusive breastfeeding might be the ideal, giving your baby formula really is OK.

    I'm hugely pro breastfeeding, always have been, always will be, but both my children have had formula and I refuse to feel guilt about that. They are safe, well fed, well cared for and loved, and the substance used to acheive the 'well fed' part of that equation will never be the most important thing in my world.

    [Modified by: MrsSetters on April 27, 2010 06:49 PM]

  • Whoever told you this wants reporting, because it is simply not true, how dare she suggest its harmful. I bet the formula making companies would happily like to sue her for that remark !

    I am like Mrs Setters, very pro breast feeding, but I also see that formula has its place and NO-ONE has the right to make a Mum feel guilt about giving formula to her child. It makes me SO angry that this kind of pressure and guilt is thrown at Mums.

    Please ignore her very foolish comment and know that you are doing your very best for your baby, however you choose to feed them

    xxx
  • This really p***es me off. I am also very pro breast feeding, but as mentioned on the feeding support thread, I have had latching problems and am therefore expressing and topping up with formula.

    The woman needs reporting. I am sick to death of people's narrow minded views on this. Like the others have said as long as you're happy thats all that matters. It's flipping well upsetting enough without all these stupid people making comments.

    Don't worry xxx
  • I knew it was a load of cr*p

    I am feeling much calmer now but still very cross

    it was the lady who performed the snip that said it but she is also a breast feeding councilor.

    like all of you i am very pro breast feeding but what she said isn't going to stop me giving him formula (once he has got used to breast feeding again)

  • I can completely empathise with you. I only managed to breastfeed for 1 week and then went onto bottle feeding. I felt awful and cried solid for three days and only managed to start to feel okay about it after a couple of weeks. There is tons of pressure to breastfeed and if it can't be done...then we have to do what is best for our little ones. My Amelia has been on formula for three weeks now and she is a happy little soul and putting on weight. That's all that matters.

    Don't let them get you down. I was formula fed as was my husband and we both turned out alright.
  • Oh hun wot a horrible thing to say to someone. I agree with mg I would report her! It was such a horrible agonsing decision to formula feed anyway, to be told that is just so nasty!! If formula was so wrong why would they sell it?? Iended up giving formula to help rhea's weight & am so glad we did, so how can it be wrong if it makes baby thrive??

    It makes me soooo angry hearing ppl react like this!! I wish I could've bf my baby &she put on weight doing it but she just hasn't!!

    Jayne & rhea xx
  • This woman does need reporting as she's a supposed expert who's giving out incorrect information. As everyone else has said whilst breastmilk is the ideal there is no way formula would be available if it was harmful so her comment is ridiculous. The worst thing about people like this is that whilst they may think they are promoting bfing all they are actually doing is creating the kind of stress that might interfere with a new mum's ability to bf!! Totally unhelpful and pointless behaviour.
  • i dont think that's true feebs. breastfeeding is very difficult for the first two weeks and if you want to do it, and are determined and prepared, you will no matter what anyone says. similarly, if you dont want to breastfeed, you wont change your mind because of anyones comments. too many people give up due to things that CAN be dealt with rather than to seek advice. there are ways to help people breastfeed through all sorts of issues. the problem is that women dont always feel they can access the support, due to stroppy midwives. only 2% of women are actually unable to breastfeed, yet the figures in this country of people who dont are way higher than that. maybe that's because formula, while not as good as breast milk, is easily accessible and people think is great as the child appears satisfied, when really it's harder for them to digest and so they are stuffed.

    anyway, i am not having a go at people who formula feed, just that there needs to be the help there for women who want to give up breastfeeding due to issues like mastitus, thrush, engorgement, inverted nipples etc, to keep them at it folr the baby.
  • Whilst I agree calleigh that if your mind is definitely set to bf or ff then no one elses comments will change your mind however I think a lot of mums fall into a more in between area where they aren't totally determined to bf and aren't totally against ff either. A comment like this woman made to wif - who has already had to make the decision to get a medical procedure done on her lo because of a problem which makes it harder to bf -can be just the sort of negativity to stop someone from seeking further feeding advice for fear of being unfairly judged. Hence my point about her comment being stupid and unhelpful if she's trying to encourage - and not scaremonger - people to bf.
  • wif - everything has already been said so I won't go off on my own rant!

    Calleigh - before Matilda was born I promised myself that I would in no way put myself under pressure to BF. In actual fact, it turned out being the world and his wife that put me under pressure! I had lots of issues such as a slight tongue tie, Matilda's upper airway being blocked due to congestion, discovering that my medication for high BP affects the amount of milk I produce. Nearly all of the 'support' I have been offered / encountered has been downright aggressive! Bearing in mind these professionals are dealing with women at a very pivotal point in their lives when hormones are running amok, I would've liked to have seen a little more compassion and understanding. I am FF and topping up with the BM I am able to express. I started to dread BF attempts and I didn't perserve because, quite frankly, it was marring the first few days of my daughter's life for me. I have found it increasingly irritating that I am asked to justify my decision to every single health professional I come into contact with. You are right; help IS there, I just don't think it's offered / administered in a particularly sensitive way all the time. I was not going to spend any more time having my boobs and baby man handled until we were both tearful in an attempt to 'help' us! x
  • thats what i mean. those people offering support arent always supportive! i was so worried i wasnt producing enough colostrum i called out a mw who's response was quite off, "this is the problem with homebriths for the first child, you dont get the support" no kidding, but that's what she was there for! i used the mws as much as i needed and little angels bfing support too. and youtube!

    also, i ageee kaycee, that many health professionals used to walk in to my house and ask to see my nipples if the postman asked i'd have probably shown him without thinking :lol:

    i strongly believe that if women were told the truth, that bfing hurts and is difficult at first and you have to get throught the first 2-6 weeks and here's what you can do to help more women would go longer, rather than being told how natural it is etc and then panicing when it does hurt and stopping.
  • Calleigh, you don't live in Derbyshire by any chance do you? My friend works for little angels!


  • also, i ageee kaycee, that many health professionals used to walk in to my house and ask to see my nipples if the postman asked i'd have probably shown him without thinking :lol:


    Ditto! :lol:
  • sorry for g/c but this makes me soooooooo mad - i desperately wanted to breast feed and have HUGE BAZOOKAS so really thought it would be easy - well after god knows how many days of nurses/midwifes/hc assistants squeezing my boobs crying to my husband down the phone at 2am he said for gods sake give toby a bottle - so we did and have never looked back and after them trying to milk me like a cow not a drop ever happened NOT ONE DROP! they made me feel so bad but if it was that bad then why is toby the most contented little man - hardly ever cries - laughs for England and is happy and healthy - do what you feel is best and if this doesnt involve bf or exclusive bf then the decision you make is the right one becasue you are the mummy and you know best x
  • Well said Summer! x
  • G/c from may,been dropping in to see how your all doing, am plannig on bf again and have been trying to prepare myself for it all over again,i'm shocked to hear a "professional" give this sort of info, i breastfed dd ,tongue-tied, for 6weeks until i started mixfeeding as couldn't cope anymore, of course i felt guilty for feeling that way even when i knew i was doing what she needed right then, she then would scream at the sight of my boobs and by 8 weeks was ff, the best thing someone said was that in years to come when dd was at school, stand and watch her with the other children and try and pick out the ones that were ff and bf, shes 8 in a few days and can safely say that she is no different, eats really well,trys more new foods than i would have at her age... A doctor told my mum this when little bro was not concentrating on bf as he wanted to see his 3 yr old sister playing!
    Good luck girls, your all doing great!
    Stef and yellow bump.xx
    38
  • I can't believe a healthcare professional could make such a ridiculous comment! Like lots of the other ladies have said I'm pro-breastfeeding but believe ff absolutely has it's place. Ryan lost 12% of his bw after just 3 days so my mw advised us to top him up with formula, I was upset to begin with as I felt like I was failing him,but he's so much more contented now and had already put a fair bit of that weight back on by day5. Luckily the bf has improved but we are still topping him up with formula when he needs it which tends to be during the day x
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