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Very unsettled 5 week old. HELP

I have no idea what i am doing wrong but i really can not settle my son.

He has gone from being a happy little soul to crying continuously and i don't know what is wrong.

He is BF and the only thing that seems to settle him is feeding. However if i put him down within 2 minutes he is screaming again.

He does not have a temperature and is not drawing his legs up or anything.

The strange thing is at night he settles well. he has a bottle (this is his only FF) at 10pm, wakes at 3 and has a feed, settles back to sleep (on his own in basket) by 4am then wakes at 7am. He seems to be fine until about 11am and then just crys and crys until 10pm. he does try and sleep but doesn't for more than 30 mins at a time.

Does anybody have any clue what could be wrong?
He seems so unhappy and i feel like a complete failure for not being able to have a happy and content baby.

:cry:

Replies

  • oh honey your not a failure, we all have time like this

    our LO was like this a lot when he was tiny and for us it was wind and possibly reflux although it wasnt diagnosed, we used gripe water and a wedge matteress which eased things for us a lot, he wouldnt lie flat until he was about 10 weeks and would scream if we tried,

    hope you get your happy little chappy back, its awful seeing them unhappy, LO is inconsolable at times now as he is teething

    xxx
  • I know you say he's not drawing his legs up. But it still might be colic, if it is continuous and the same every day, Also because feeding settles him again.

    Try the colic remedies like cycling his legs, rubbing around his belly button in a circle in a clockwise direction, or in small circles around his belly button in a circle in a clockwise direction.

    If any of these seem to work, then it could well be colic. Then you might want to consider Infacol or Dentinox drops.

    Hope he settles soon, you are definitely not a failure. I'm sure most of us have felt like that at some point. But it's a process of elimination, and getting to know each other. xx

    mithical and James 16 weeks today!
  • oh hun i totally understand how you feel, my DD is similar and is around the same age.

    She cries at night from about 7pm and it can go on ALL night, we have both been in tears trying to soothe and calm her and we find it so hard. You are NOT a bad parent, lots of babies suffer this and the fact you care so much says you are a wonderful mum.

    I went to see out HV yesterday to plead for help and she said its colic- which is not just bad wind BTW it is inconsolable crying and often no cause is found.

    She recommended baby message which we started today at our local health centre. Other ideas included half an ounce of cooled boiled water with some gripe water in, she said the warmth helps settle babys tummy. She also said diet can affect breastmilk and suggested I try cutting out wheat or dairy...so am eating no wheat for a couple of days to try it out.
    I sing to bubs, read her stories, put her in her swinging chair the list goes on..

    A warm bath seems to calm Etienne for a while. as does a car ride, but at times nothing works. I find getting out of the house with her for a bit helps my sanity- can you go to some groups and meet other mums- I am sure there will be others you meet who are going through the same. Surestart centres are good, leisure centres and churches all run groups, plus babys crying never sounds as bad when you are out, as in the four walls of home !

    Can you see your HV for some support- thats what they are there for. Ask for some help, you should not have to deal with this alone.


    HTH and good luck

    xx
  • That's not much sleep in the daytime, perhaps if you carry him in a sling he will feel more secure and maybe sleep more.
  • NAK so short, but it does sound like colic - have you considered taking him for some cranial osteopathy? My friend's son had a session and turned into a different baby!
  • Thank you all for your replies.

    I have got some infacol in now so we will see if that helps.

    I thought things would get easier but I actually feel as though I have less and less of a clue what i am doing.

    I am so greatful for the support and advice from everyone on here, think i may have gone around the twist without it.
  • I used infacol with my LO as she had bad colic, I found it amazing...but...it doesn't work over night, it has an accumulative effect and so it'll take a few days for you to notice a difference. Also, I took Sara off it as she had improved so much I thought she might no longer need it, first few feeds were fine but then we were back to square one! Keep going with it until about 12-14 weeks!

    Good luck, really hope you get your lovely happy baby back asap!
    Liz xxx
  • Wif weve all been there and its horrible and I fet like a complete failure too when grant used to scream and me - his own mother not only didnt have a clue what was wrong but coudnt soothe him for love nor money!

    As the other girls have already pointed out, colic doesnt always mean bad tummy and there are lots of things you can try and unfortunatley its just a process of elimination im afraid. I used infacol for a while but a change of milk helped me. I know that doesnt help you much because you breastfeed.

    One thing the HV mentioned was to cut out wheat and dairy..but if your lo is getting normal formula and is settling then surely that point is moot?

    I know your lo is very young but do you have a routine and a napping system? it could be tierdness too? I wish I had started a routine earlier with grant because as soon as I implemented it he became so much happier and predictable.

    Oh and another thing - sometimes babys 'change' at 6 weeks..not always but sometimes. You may see a dramatic natural change in your baby in the next few weeks image

    The last thing I will say (I promise) Is this: Your are NOT alone, at one point or another we have all sobbed in sync with our bubs, got it into our head that we dont have a clue and beat ourselves up for things we cannot explain. You WILL get through this. Just take some deep breaths the next time your lo starts to cry and remeber shell start to smile soon and youll forget all about it! xx
  • I would second cranial osteopathy!

    Adam was a very cranky baby (refusing to sleep in the day, crying loads) until we had a couple of sessions - he's now a much happier and more settled little chap!

    If you're in London I can recommend Adam Beaumont at Neals Yard, Clapham...

    xx
  • Hi
    this sounds just like Monty! He was the most chilled out newborn, then around week 4 he got grumpy. He'd cry for no apparent reason during the day and grumble and whinge incessantly. The HV said it was colic but if it was it must have been 'mild colic', if there's such a thing, as I know parents if babies with colic and it would be an insult to their stoicism in the face of such arduous weeks to refer to what we went through as colic. This is not to say that it wasn't distressing, it was, but it was more a constant whinge and grumble than screaming with what seems to be pain.

    So, anyway, we had resigned ourselves to the fact that Monty was a grumpy little chap and that was that. Then at week 11-12 things changed dramatically! He turned into this chirpy little lad image. Oh hr still had his off moments but on the whole he is a different baby. So there is light at the end of the tunnel - keep up the mantra "this will not last forever".

    On a practical note, monty did suffer badly with wind on top of all this and infacol did help. I also found cutting out chocolate *sigh* made a massive difference (again a temporary measure as his wind issues have vastly improved now). Also, when he's crying the one thing guaranteed to work is his sling - it was a godsend in those weeks. Often it was the only way to get him to sleep as well.

    Xxx
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