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I'm new - financial nightmare!

Hi All

I'm new here as we're only recently married and thinking of TTC from April 2011 onwards as we have some big holidays booked before then and would like to move to a two bedroomed place.

However, I've just looked at our finances and I have no idea how we will manage if I were to fall pregnant next year. We both work full time at the moment and live in a one bed flat. We don't have any debts with the exception of a loan on my car which is minimal. Because of this I was under the impression that although you're probably never in a position to 'afford' a baby, we would be okay.

Pay during maternity leave wouldn't really be too much of a problem; but it would be childcare costs afterwards that would cripple us. Ideally I would go part time, and my work has a nursery on site - but I just think this would not be possible financially.

Am i being stupid by looking at this now? It's really got me down as we have both agreed that we would love to start trying next year (we know it could take a while or even not happen at all). So I suppose my question is how do you cope financially with starting a family? Do you just manage no matter what? Or reply on hubby's wage to get you through? My partner earns the same as me and does not have a great deal to spare each month.

Sorry to rant, I just feel like despite being in what I always thought was a relatively positive financial position (we save etc) we will never be in a position to be able to afford to start a family :cry:


  • We had the same dilema when we started trying, do i go back to work or do i leave and just cope on one wage?

    When we added it all up the cost of childcare used up all off my money, so i decided not to go back, we do miss a few luxeries like holidays abroad, new car etc but we manage fine. I mean whats the point of me working to just pay someone else to look after my baby?

    We dont get any help but most people qualify for tax credits and childcare allowance and stuff, maybe go and see you CAB and see if they can help with what u can get once u fall preggers.

    Good Luck


  • Hi G/cing... I didnt really realise the cost of nursery till I was pregnant but like you I work full time my OH works full time, we both have good jobs and no major debts apart from house. We my son arrived we were living in a 2 bed house and we coped while I was on mat lave better than expected. We even managed to move to a 3 bed house! now Im back at work full time its not idea but theres no financial benefit for me working part time. My lo is in nursery 5 days a week and he loves it! It costs us a fortune in nursery fees - ??190 a week (??760 pm) but we cope. Things can be little tight it doesnt help that we have things we want to do to our new house. We r not going on holiday this year but that is more because we feel my son is too young to enjoy it (hes 16months today!!)

    We r now thinking about no2. My oh is 41 this year another child would complete our family.However 2 in nursery would be impossible... but I think we could do it (not full time but 3 days a week) Anyways.... I think you just get by somehow... it can be stressful worrying about money but its worth every min to get the smiles and laughters and cuddles and kisses from your baby it really is!

    Good luck to you and I hope it happens for you

    Emma x
  • i too feel like this, im a stay at home mum to my 16 month old son and we are ttc another in aug, i dont want to work till they in full time school and tbh with childcare costs from my point of view there is no point, if i had to i would but we cope but we do without the finer things too, but we have food on the table and love and laugh alot!.xxx
  • Hi there,

    Your right in the fact that there is never 'a right time' financially to have a baby. But like everyone has said, you just seem to manage and get by.

    Alternatively, you could look into tax credits. You get paid weekly based on your earnings for the previous year. For eg, when your child is 9 months and you are ready to return to work, you could ring the tax office and give them you earnings for the previous year (which in your case will include SMP) from this they deduct around ??3900 which will leave you with a low income for the previous financial year, they will then add this to your OH's wage for the previous year. If you also tell them that you are putting your child into a nursery/childminder, they should cover some of the cost of that. My childminding fee's are ??111PW and I only work part time! I get 85% of that paid by the tax office. I receive around ??180 weekly from tax credits altogether and believe me this does help so it is definitely worth looking into.

    Money shouldn't have to hold us back from having what we want most.

    Hope this is of some kind of help and not too confusing, but you can always ask me if you're not sure!

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