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Stage?

Just wondering, do you think its possible that Elijah is having his clingy stage now? Lately hes cuddling me all the time, hanging on me, following me everywhere. Even when oh is here and tries to play with him, he just wants to be around me. He's never been like this before, always a Daddy's boy. We have always been really close, but i just mean he's never been so clingy before.
He never went through that stage EVER as a baby either, he never cried when i left or when oh left, he was just so happy to be around people. Never had that separation anxiety.

Also, he's quite aggressive to me too at times recently, he climbs all over me (which is so annoying!) hurts me and when I tell him to stop that isnt nice he just shouts and says "yes, it is nice!" Im not sure what sort of punishment is appropriate as he doesnt seem to listen when I tell him off. He has a star chart and doesnt get his stars if he doesnt behave well with certain things, but this isnt working for the aggressive behaviour.
I generally will give him a warning that he will go in time out if he does it again, but the behaviour always seems to have big gaps of time between it, so its always like im telling him off for separate incidents with no follow through. Im getting annoyed at myself for shouting I just wish he would listen and not hurt me! Hes also really bad at giving me ANY space whatsoever, just follows me around and its really frustrating to have no space, but i know this is prob just the age.
Perhaps its just all one big stage??! Any of yours doing similar things?? xxx

Replies

  • Rhys has recently been like this, following me round all the time, so much so that I end up tripping over him all the time. He'd always play on his own for ages too wheras now he rarely does this and he wants me to play with him or at least sit with him whilst he plays. I put it down to a little jealousy over me doing so much for Alfie at the minute, but maybe it's an age thing?

    As for the hitting etc, we also had this but when he did it I started saying no mummy doesn't like that, that makes mummy sad and I would pick him up off me and just place him next to me or something he'd say sorry and I'd talk to him about not doing it etc and it seems to have worked after awhile as he doesn't do it anymore (well rarely still can have his moments lol).
  • Noah's been quite clingy too but he's always been more of a mummys boy than a daddys boy. My older one who is 5 is doing it too. thay both want it to be me that gets up to them, me who reads them a story, me thats cuts the food on their plate and me that puts their shoes on. EVERYTHING in fact. Its quite annoying because I end up doing everything but also quite hurtful to my husband because my oldest will say go away daddy i don't want you i want mummy! he was always a daddys boy and to some extent this has been since noah was born and there was a rival for my affections so to speak but recently its got worse. Maybe they do go through stages. its hard to know what to do though. Most of the time we ignore it but sometimes if they're getting upset I end up taking over so they get what they want!
  • He's still doing the climbing over me thing & the hitting or pinching image Then the rest of the time he's saying 'Mummy, i miss you' / 'Mummy you love me??' dont know what to do!!! x
  • Oh dear, zachariah's very clingy too but I think it's probably my fault as I've never really not been with him- but even at the park he needs me within range for him- it's hard to know what to do really but I'm sure Elijah will grow out of it.
    As for the hurting, I'm not really sure what to suggest, zachariah sometimes hurts me but it's definitely unintentional.
    This is probably going to sound crazy but I'd seen this dog/puppy training thing and always thought it would work if need be. Basically when the dog bit the owner was meant to yelp/squeal in pain and put their back to the dog, the idea was it would make the dog acknowledge it was pain and not a game. I don't see why this wouldn't work with a child (well, in theory lol! image
  • I think that's a good idea w4b, but I think with Elijah he would just laugh if I did that. I actually do shout in genuine pain sometimes when he hurts me! And he laughs, naughty boy.. x
  • I havent got the clingy thing as such just serious terrible twos with the over the top play fighting which ends up hurting i say no thats naughty and he will shout at me NOOOOO not naughty mummy you naughty (cheeky) so if he hits i put straight on naughty spot and it always works he says sorry for what he has done and kisses etc and carries on playing - if just playing up he has warning!

    xx
  • I am trying out the naughty spot this week, as a few of you have said to put him straight on for hitting etc and i was giving him warnings for this. Its seems to be working better as he's taking me more seriously! Lol. Yesterday though he refused to go out to playgroup saying 'its not fair'! Where on earth hes picked that up from i dont know!!! x
  • I am trying out the naughty spot this week, as a few of you have said to put him straight on for hitting etc and i was giving him warnings for this. Its seems to be working better as he's taking me more seriously! Lol. Yesterday though he refused to go out to playgroup saying 'its not fair'! Where on earth hes picked that up from i dont know!!! x
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