Forum home Babies Baby

what is it with "its my baby"?! She's mine!

I'm sure I'm not the only one with this issue, but need a wee rant!
My mum sees me and DD once a week which is fine, but she always goes on about how DD is her baby, not mine (she doesn't actually say that shes not mine, just constantly says "she's my baby"). It drives me potty! I totally get that shes besotted with her grandaughter which is lovely, but I made her, I feed her, I soothe her!!!!!
I said to her today about shes def mine cos I'm the one who gave birth, gets up in the night, provides the nipples. She thought I was only messing about...!
Its no big deal, but shes mine, nobody else's (well except my hubby's!image )!!

Anyway, rant over, and breathe imageimage

xx

Replies

  • You rant away hun. I can only imagine what this is like though, mainly because after having the boys for a day, both my mum and stepmum are so pleased to give them back!

    I wish I had the answer but sending you hugs...and she IS your baby!!
  • my mil does this too, annoys me big time!!
  • My mil does this too, its really annoying, when she found out i was pregnant again she sent me a text to say congrats its lovely to hear we are expecting again ermmmm no me and oh are expecting not you !!! I know she means no harm but it grates on me x x
  • My MIL doesnt do this but my Nana does and yes it drives me insane too!
    I also tried the whole " I was in labour for 24 hours and i had the emergency section and i gave birth to him therefore he's mine (and hubbys!)
    She took it as a joke too and didnt stop saying it!

    xx
  • You rant away! I'm glad you srtarted this thread as this is bugging me to.

    Hubby took baby boy to his family for 2 days to give me a break (and mostly cos I don't like them so good excuse not to go! lol) and she put pics of his visit on facebook with comments about how it was good to have her 2 babies with her and how my boy gets his good looks from her!!!!!!!!!! FFS, I know I don't deal with her well, she's alright I suppose but I lost my mum 5 years ago and theres a lot of pent up anger and jealousy about her banging on and on about being a Nan, wish she's have more sernsitivity.

    My friend does it to sometimes, my boy, my baby, I love her to bits but that winds me up to. Like you said, I did all the hard bloody work, pregnancy, labour, day to day and all night shifts. I don't want anyone to take the credit thanks very much! Plus my sister and dad manage to never use the word 'my' when referring to AJ so I'm damn sure every bugger else can!!

    And breathe.... feels better lol image xxx
  • I don't have exactly that but one of my friends always says 'look she loves me' whenever lo smiles in her direction. I just want to say no she doesn't she loves me, and her daddy, and her sister, she just smiled at you! :x
  • I have another thing about love that annoys me too!! Anything my lo does, eating, playing, whatever my Nana says "He loves that" Like "He loves his milk", "He loves that food"
    No actually he's taking his milk today but thats unusual he usually turns his nose up at it these days and this food, he doesn't love it, he's just eating it cos i'm giving it to him and he likes the taste, now petit filous, he loves them!! You can tell with his wide open mouth and mmmnnning that he does when eating it.

    Sorry, just totally hijacked your thread!

    xx
  • Oh god my mil really got to me one day with this one and the only reason she got away with it was because it was her mothers funeral.

    She has a very bad habit of getting lipstick everywhere - including the toilet seat (she smokes whilst she cleans and touched her lips with the cig then ob put the toilet lid down or something). She also thinks it's acceptable to kiss ds and leave horrible big sticky marks on his face - funnily enough she never did it this time I was down...huh - anyway we were making a joke of it and I said yeah she gets it everywhere...thetouls seat and my baby! To which she replied 'i think you'll find he's OUR baby'

    I could have killed her right there and then - our baby indeed. My mum has bought her grandson his cot, hundreds of clothes, mountains of toys and buys him food when he stays. She has bought him a few bibs and vests and thinks she owns him. It's always things like 'oh I was GOING to buy a cot for when you are down but you never told us you were coming' eh...I think it's a fair assumption that hel be down at some point in the next few years so stop telling us your going to do things you have no inclination of doing!!!

    The beat one though was 'we feel bad that you never let us buy anything - I mean, you have everything now and we can't buy anything for the baby' I was 32 weeks pregnant and this was the first time they offered to buy anything so yes I had my pram paid for and we bloody struggled payin for it too.

    They did get us something though...a flippin video camera.

    Yes, my child needs a video camera right now...not clothes or blankets or toys...tossers
  • lol, if we're on a whinge fest I have another one, hubbys Nan, she laughs, yep, LAUGHS when AJ cries, it pee's me off not end. She says its because its cute... No. Its not fecking cute, its heart string pulling cos he rarely cries and when he does its for a reason. Urgh.

    Sorry to, another hijacker, just having a good moan so I don't actually say out loud what I think and risk a divorce lol xxx
  • Isn't it funny how possessive/protective we are of our LOs.

    My best friend from school (who I am sad to say I feel I have grown apart from, but she doesn't feel the same) keeps saying, "when are you going to say "Aunty Emily, Lily?" and even that harmless little thing grates on me! She will never say Aunty Emily, because 1. you're not her Aunty and 2. she doesn't really know you, despite you acting like you own her (she's always trying to give her bits of food, and commandeering the buggy, and calling her pet names).

    Ooh, didn't realise quite how irritated I was by all that until I wrote it down!
  • Oops, looks like I started something here!!

    I also hate it when either my mum or MIL apparently know whats up with my DD. To be honest, most of the time, its a guess - anyone can say DD is hungry, tired or bored. But its when they say it like "Oh she's due a feed isn't she?" like they know her so well and her routine and why the hell aren't I doing anything about it right now?!?! Classic example today, we were at a leaving do. My mum said DD was whingy cos she was tired cos I had interupted her nap (which I hadn't actually) - she was actually upset cos of so many people in her face! My MIL looks after DD one arvo a week and I once gave her the bottle and started off saying "she was last fed at 1pm, so her next feed will be at..." She interupted and said "at 4pm, cos its 3 hourly isn't it?" Well, actually no, it used to be 3 hourly but its changed now, cos shes growing...

    I appreciate they are listening and they do know her well but really not as well as me! She is changng soooo much that from one week to the next, it has changed entirely!

    Oh and another one! My MIL bought a big swing thing. We were round there few days ago and she put DD in it saying "DD loves being in swings doesn't she, her daddy used to like swinging when he was a baby" Well, how do you know, DD has never been in a swing in her life!! And just cos her daddy liked it doesn't mean DD will too!

    Then there's the weaning. DH was weaned at 2 months old cos he was a hungry baby. I had rusk in my bedtime milk which is how I slept through from very little apparently. Okay fine, but I do wish thye'd stop telling me this stuff with a hint of 'I think you should do the same thing too' tone of voice.

    Rah!
    Oh it was only meant to be a tiny rant about "my baby"!!!

    Oh hum!
    xx
  • hi hun, i know how irritating this can be....my nan and my auntie both say "wheres my baby"! my hubby always does impressions of them which is quite funny, i used to get irritated with it, but now me and oh have made a private joke about it we can jus laugh it off. xxx
  • My nephew calls Haiden his, but that quite amuses me. "She's mine". "My Baby Haiden". It's quite cute x
  • My mum started when I was pregnant when she referred to my bump as 'ours' grrrrrrrrrrrrr needless to say she refers to Freddie as 'her boy'

    I count to 10 A LOT!
  • My Nan allways "knows" what Freddie wants, "he is hungry" "He wants some water" "He is too warm" No he is not hungry he was fed an hour ago, no he is not thirsty he cant stand water, no he is not too warm it he is 5 weeks old and needs to wear more than you do, he is fed up of being past from person to person everytime you 5 people all decide to visit in one go and he is sick off the camera being flashed an inch from his face.

    I know people love our babies and want to make the most of them when they visit but why cant they listen when you tell them that they are over stimulated, its too much for them when they are so little!!!
  • OMG i know exactly what everyone is talking about!

    my mum drives me crazy with the 'my baby' thing all the time and cmpletely doesn't get why it annoys me. Oh and i try to laugh about it but its so frutrating!

    another thing my mum does is when we are with other people in a group she always says things like 'i'm broke after having lily' or 'she has so much stuff thanks to nanny and grandad' - this really grates on me cos it was oh and me that struggled to buy everything we needed and save up for our baby - oh who did any hours of overtime he could get, me who sold my laptop, gave up my expensive gym membership and sold loads of our stuff on ebay so we could get our dream pram and everythign else we needed! Yes i really appreciate my mum and dad buying lily's cot a couple of months ago - even though we had the money they insisted but why do something just to throw it up in people's faces?

    As for MIL she is fine except for the fact that (as we live with her and sher has serious OCD about her house) she is always going on and on about stupid things like A bottle being left in the sink in the kitchen, or somebody sitting on her sofa, or lily's toys being left on her playmat in our bedroom rather than being put away (even tho lily is using them!). also she has started pointing out things like 'i never gave my boys fish until they were a year old' and 'all three of my boys were potty trained by the age of one' grrr really grates on me!

    also something EVERYBODy does is tell me how i had an 'easy' labour because I had a homebirth without any pain relief - apparently i didn't have pain relief because i wasn't in pain so obviously my labour was easy as I didn't spend 14 hours on gas and air etc in hospital. It really pisses me off - i was in labour from 6pm on the third of january to 10am on 4th when she was born - my midwives couldn't come out as they were all on duty elsewhere but i had no choiuce than to go without pain relief because i refused to go to hospital! that doesn't mean i had it 'easy' image

    peopel telling me whats wrong with her when she is upset is annoying too 'oh she's too hot/cold/looks colicky!' omg it makes me want to scream at them that the only thing making her cry is actually THEM! or people telling me what to do with MY baby - it may be my first baby but im not incompetant - all the decisions we have made have been well researched, just because we do it our way instead of listening to their old wives tales doesn't mean we are doing things wrong!

    People taking over my buggy when we are out grates on me - me and oh take turns pushing the buggy but my mum will just grab it and sneak off in the supermarket pushing the baby around alone it really pisses me off! And once i left lily with her for ten minutes whilst i went with my dad to help him with his computer and when i got back she had completely dissapeared! i tried ringing her on her mobile a hundred times and she only answered AN HOUR later to say 'oh sorry hun we just went shopping' - that is sooo unnacceptable i couldn't even talk to her i was so angry!

    omg i have ranted sooo much! *soorrrry** image

    xxx
  • What a fab thread to rant on...... here goes,

    my 2nd baby is due in nov and MIL is doing my head in already, her best friends DIL is also due the same week as me and she keeps going on how as soon as her baby is born she can't wait to take it out for long walks with her friend, or to meet at each others houses with their babies and basically I will get loads of rest as she will have her baby during the day for most days of the week and how wonderful her friend is going to be a grandma at the same time etc etc.

    I didn't bf with my first daughter, but am going to bf with this baby, even more so for the fact if I do, my mil can't take my baby away from me!!!!

    She is a lovely person who I do get on very well with but she is overpowering and quite interfering, most of the time I just let everything go over my head but this is bugging me lots!!!

    Sorry ranted abit too.

    Alex can't believe your mum just took your baby away off shopping and didn't answer her phone I would of been soooooo mad!!

    xx
  • I think threads like this are so therapeutic, getting it out without offending the pseron saying these things. Although they dont think twice about offending you!!

    Alex, I really cant believe your Mum took the baby shopping without asking, i'd have been furious!!!

    xx
  • MIL is the worst. She is a bit over the top with it and I have to bite my tongue! I know I am just going to blurt it out...she's mine, not yours now get over it! xxx
Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions