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How do i do it.....

Hey ladies
sorry it took me a cpl days to get on here. I posted on thursday with some symptoms that were worrying me! It was my first pregnancy and a total suprise at that given i was on the implant but never mind!
We were happy and excited for it all aswell!
Unfortunately i had some bleeding and went to the EPU they examined me and took some blood then they done an internal and told me that my cervix was open which would lead to an inevitable miscarriage i was offered a scan but decided against it as i thought it would be worse as i was only 9+6 and hadnt seen the baby alive so certainly didnt wanna see it any other way!
I decided against the whole D&C as i just wanted to go home and cry and be with my partner....im only 20 and the doc decided i wasnt in a risk group to not be able to pass the embryo image Which i have done i think i had about 4 big clots the last cpl days and a HUGE painfull one earlier this evening i couldnt bear to look down the toilet so i flushed without looking!
I am so gutted.....i wanted this baby so badly! We both did and we didnt plan it but we loved the baby already! We dont know what where going to do or how to get through this! We have been together since it happened but we live in separate houses so at some point soon we will have to be alone and that day is one im not looking forward too he has been my rock thru all of this! As for trying again we have not decided yet i need to recover from all this and then see what happens xxx You ladies are an inspiration i have read what some of you have been through and its amazing,..xxx

Replies

  • Hi there Bbump....im so sorry for your loss. Its heartbreaking, no othere way to describe it. As for how to do it....I dont know how we do, but we do. It will take you time, and everyone is different. I had my MC a few weeks ago and do now feel a lot more positive, but still sad of course. I looked for reasons why my baby didnt make, and felt that my body had let me down. Now I have to accept that something wasnt right and my body knew what it was doing. I hang onto that. Look at the good things in your life and focus on those. Time is a great healer, and you will get lots of support from the girls on this site, we know how you feel xxx
  • Hi, I'm so sorry that you're going through this. I wish I could say something that would make the pain less.

    I had an awful few weeks but things are starting to get easier now.

    My advise it just to give yourself some time

    Big Hugs x
    Ciara
  • Hi Bbump, i'm so sorry for your loss, there really is nothing anyone can say and all the well meaning advice from people you just have to listen to, quite often people don't know what to say so quote statistics and that 'it wasn't meant to be'. None of this helped me and I found that over time it just got a little easier to deal with. I lost my 1st baby in April this year and although it was the most horrendous thing i've ever had to cope with I can talk about it now and it's not easy but not as bad as it was. Just give yourself time to grieve, both you and your partner and I promise that it won't always feel this bad.

    Lots of love xx
  • Hi Hun. ((hugs)) first of I'm so sorry for what you've been through. There's nothing anyone can say to take away how your feeling. I also lost my baby at 12 week scan. Had a missed miscarriage which took 3 days to lose. I know the pain and disbelief you are feeling. It does get better I promise you it does. The first 2 weeks were the hardest for us. I stayed of work and got my self better. We had already decided that trying for another baby was our way forward and it gave me hope and determination to get better. What was worst was the empty feeling I had inside me and I felt horrible as I was still bleeding. Once it stopped then began my recovery. I am now 7 weeks pregnant and although I will never forget the trauma I went through or my little one I feel much better. Get as much support as you need and if you need to talk about it, then do as it will make you feel better. I needed to talk about it. Were all here if you need us. X
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