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had a difficult month, but i'm back in the game! :\)

Hey ladies

I have just been lurking in the background of here for the past month. So many people have been lucky enough to get their BFPs and move on in that time, and sadly there are a lot of new people too but no better place they could be under the circumstances. For those of you who don't know me, I had a MMC at the end of April and then had an ovarian ectopic on the 9th July.

I haven't really felt ready to face up to what has happened, and have just been concentrating on getting myself physically well again after my surgery. I am glad to say that I do feel 100% back to normal physically and even got my period 29 days after the surgery. Although I have a huge distrust in periods given what happened last time so have been testing just to make sure I am getting BFNs!

So anyway, I think that is me ready to try again! I have this overwhelming yearning inside me to get pregnant and be a mum. Every day passing knowing I am not makes the feeling grow stronger. After the panic and rush of the ectopic I wasn't sure I would want to try again, and part of me is silently terrified. But I have to do it, I want this more than anything else.

I promised my husband that we would take it easy until the end of the year, as in we would just see what happened. But I can't do that. The whole OV testing doesn't stress me out, it actually helps me as I am more in control. The thought of just -seeing what happens' fills me with panic!

So I am back in the game! Hopefully I will ovulate around the 21st of the month, and we go on holiday on the 18th! Really looking forward to our holiday and will be packing my OV tests!

If we don't conceive this month and AF makes an appearance on/around the 3rd September then I will start using my CBFM again!

Exciting times ladies, wish me luck! And lots of luck to you all!

xxxx

Replies

  • Hi Kat,

    It's good to see you back here again (well not, but you know what I mean...) trying again, now that you feel ready.

    A good holiday worked for us this time, so hopefully it will work for you too, and you won't need the CBFM!

    Best wishes, and lots of good luck!
    Lxx
  • Hi Kat
    Good to see you back ready to try again. IT is an awful experience to go through but having the ability to talk to people going through the same thing has really helped me. Hope this month is lucky for us both! I know what you mean about feeling in control if you use the OV testing etc - I am the same, without doing it I feel less in control and more panicked.
    Baby dust to us all for the next month.
  • Hi there Kat. Just wanted to wish you lots of luck. Sounds like youv'e been to hell and back recently. Something we all understand. Fingers crossed for you. Have a great holiday xx
  • Thanks girls! It really feels like I've woke up today with such a positive energy telling me the time is right!
    It's amazing what we put ourselves through, but it will be so worth it when we that bfp that sticks! (as you know amberL!! xx)
    Xxx

    Pps
  • best of luck to you, I know what you mean about being terrified but we just have to get back and try again.
    fingers crossed for you
    xxxx
  • Welcome back Kat xx Babydust in copious amounts xx
    Take care
    Sue x
  • Glad to see you back here, you're sounding really well!!

    Loadsa luck and babydust for August!! xx
  • Welcome back Kat

    I'm really loving your PMA..... Enjoy your holiday and good luck
    xxx
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