Another night feed questions - please help =(

_GC_ · Aug 12, 2010 4:17PM

My favourite topic, sleep, or lack thereof....

LO is now 22 weeks and has got into the pattern of feeding every 3 hours or less at night (on a very good night he'll go 4 hours but hardly happens) He is EBF and prior to 4 month growth spurt would go anything from 5-8 hours between feeds at night (did wake to be settled once or twice) adn when he woke would feed on one side for 5-10 mins then that would be him again. During the day he would go every 1.5-2 hours between feeds and again just on one side.

Now he feeds every 3 hours but from both sides and feeds for about 20-30mins a time at night but during the day he can be very fussy and distractable and keep pulling on and off so sometimes doesnt feed well at all.

However all this waking at night is killing me, I'm lucky to get more than 4-5 hours a night and its beginning to take its toll physically and mentally - during the day I love him more than anything but at night I get so frustrated with him and I dont want it to be like that, its making my not enjoy being a mum like I should be doing. I feel like my milk isnt satisfying him the way it should or used to. We started weaning this week but it's still early days so he's only on first tastes. DH and I have discussed giving him formula before bedtime but I desperately want to make it to 6 months EBF so am hoping to find some words of wisdom as to either why he's waking so frequently and is so hungry, or any tips to stop him feeding so regularly. Could it be my milk is no longer good enough?

Thanks for any help you can give me
A very tired grizzle.....

xxLadybirdxx · Aug 12, 2010 2:37AM

hey hun,

I feel your pain! myy dd went through similar at that age. She is 25 weeks and althoughshe doesn't wake so often she still wakes once or twice for a feed. I would try to stick with it, i know how hard it is but your baby is getting bigger so needs more milk which is why he is feeding so much. Once he has increased your supply it will settle down. Can you express some milk to allow your hubby to give him a night feed while you get some sleep? I really don't think formula will make any difference, it may just upset his tummy.

Stick with it and it will get better, good luck xxx

squiggle2010 · Aug 12, 2010 2:39AM

Hiya, sorry you are having a rough ride. It does sound like LO is hungry and although you said you want to make it to 6 months it might be worth 1 formula bottle before bed. LO is still getting all the goodness from you and u might some real sleep. He could be difficult during the night because he is picking up on your tention, have you considered expressing so your OH can step in?
I expressed after 2 weeks because my LO wouldn't latch on properly, god it hurt!
Hope you get sorted soon xxx

_GC_ · Aug 12, 2010 4:00AM

Thanks, my head says formula isn't the answer its just so hard when all his ff counterparts are sleeping so much better. Am going to try expressing his night feed again see if that helps although not sure how much I'll get out. Dh is brilliant at the moment and gets up with him when he won't settle after a feed and at weekends takes him so I get a lie in but then during the week it feels like one step forwards two steps back iyswim.

xxLadybirdxx · Aug 12, 2010 4:25AM

It's so hard isn't it? You are lucky your dh is on hand to help you so much

If you are going to express, try not to worry about expressing a whole feed in one go, aim for a couple of ozs a night (or whenever you express) and build up to a full feed. You will be amazed at how quickly you will be able to get more than a couple of ozs!

Good luck xxx

-moonbean- · Aug 12, 2010 4:32AM

my major 'beef' with breastfeeding is that they don't tell you all this can happen you get your mw for the first two weeks and then thats it your on your own you haven't been warned of the constant feeds the fact that breastfeeding istself can make you depressed (my HV thought this is what was happening to me which is why she suggested weaning at 17 weeks, she was worried i was on a downward spiral!) it is handy at night etc etc but the whole experience for me has been more stressful than anything else, may be if I had have beenable to express and get some help it may have been different but I think for number 3 (if I'm lucky enough to get another) I would give one bottle a day so I can have some sort of relief,

fyi following on hv comments about my greedy boy have knocked the 11, 3 and 6 feeds in the head, he was actually fine just needed distracted more but not gurning the way I thought he would be so he obviously was just 'using' me rather than hungry lol little tinker!

_GC_ · Aug 12, 2010 3:58PM

moonbean I totally agree. I think bf'ing has been the cause of so much unhappiness for me over the past 5 months - but because I know its by far and away the best thing for my LO I can't give it up either so it's just a vicious circle. I always think if he was ff he'd sleep better, I'd feel less trapped (probably wrong to say but its true at times) and we'd both be happier but then I know I'd feel so guilty for him being ff that it would eat me up inside.

Damned if you do, damned if you dont.

On a happier note have been at work for the day so he's had a bottle of EBM before bed so I can now express for tomorrow night and see if we can get back to expressing enough for an EBM feed a night.

-moonbean- · Aug 12, 2010 4:05PM

aw good on your with the ebm i hope you can keep it up - tbh i had an awful afternoon with both of mine and just felt like such a crap mummy i was so wrecked and just eshausted mentally with the refusal of bottles/cups and not going down for full sleep and was snapping at my ds1 which was totally uncalled for which left me feeling like sh*t, then when ds2 woke after a staggering 35 mins this afternoon I thought i'll just leave him and see what happens, he started to cry so i went up fed him put him down and thought i'll leave him a bit I kept thinking after every 5 mins he'll stop and it just went on me going in topping up his feed going down asleep waking up after 5 mins crying - I just thought if I could feed him back over he would get his good proper sleep as he was so knackered - he probably cried more today than he has in his whole wee life to be fair to reece he does not cray AT ALL i can go weeks without him crying he is just such a wee happy sod so i felt like i had given him an awful day and spent from about 4 until 730 there kissing him and making him laugh to try and make him forget, then in to ds1 and hugging and kissing him and reading him extra bedtime stories for being pants to him

sorry just bombarded your post im actually gurning again i love my kids so much but I just have no one around me support wise (close mum or a sister etc etc) so am lonely a lot and have no let out so take it out on the ones i shouldn't which is prob why im never off this bloody site lol xx

_GC_ · Aug 12, 2010 4:13PM

Oh what a crap day you've had, I'm sure DS wont remember in the morning, we all have our off days,and I'm sure Reece will be his happy self again tomorrow. LO cries all the time so I'm used to it now! I know how you feel though, I got so p**sed off at LO last night when he woke for the umpteenth time, I just had to walk out the room, and then felt horrid because he's just a baby, he's not doing it on purpose, he just wants his mummy (or her boobs!)

And in terms of support I know what you mean, my mum is amazing but miles away and sometimes you dont want to tell the people you see all the time that actually you're having a bit of a s**t time of things. Although I did spend all day today telling my colleagues how little sleep I get and how knackered I am, then how cute LO was as an afterthought. Oops...

-moonbean- · Aug 12, 2010 4:17PM

lol re work its better off your chest building it up isn't good either xx

i was just looking into his wee face while he had he bedtime feed and thinking how gorgeous and innocent he is and how much i truely love him and gave him an extra wee squeeze before putting him down

Another night feed questions - please help =(

Replies

Featured Discussions

Promoted Content