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more annoying comments from mum..

Hi Girls

Some of you may have read about the annoying comments I have had so far from various people, my mum and dad being the worst becasue they lost 4 babies prematurely ( 2 at 20 weeks 2 at 30 weeks) and I was born at 28 weeks but survived!!

I understand that they have bad experiences, but mum gave birth to me, and to my brother and sister after me, I have friends who have miscarried, as have I in the early stages and we have simply focussed on the babies we have (and in my case the healthy baby I am carrying).

I am as low risk as you can get, and keep telling mum that I'm completely different to her and that I do understand her experience and comfort her..

But literally its all the time, "we can't buy anything" its bad luck, and if we do go and help you buy a travel system "what happens if you lose the baby, can you get a refund?".

I know you have to keep an open mind, but honestly its kind of crushing my pregnancy experience as my folks just can't get excited for me, not until the baby comes out healthy.

RARRHH!!

Replies


  • hi,

    Parents....hey....they think they are doing the right thing, but sometimes they just dont.......

    You are still their little girl and they just don't want the hurt that they went through....

    have you actually tried to talk to them to say that although you understand they have your feelings at heart that it is started you get you down....

    perhaps you could buy stuff and just hide it away so that don't know you have brought it....

    xxxx
  • I have started buying loads of things, and mum has said that next weekend they will come looking for travel systems, but they just don't seem really excited as its always overshaddowed by their feelings of remorse.. I guess I keep pushing it because I'm excited and I want them to share my excitement, but hey ho, I'm sure they'll come around sooner or later! X
  • Good grief. I know that your mum has had a very hard time, but come on.

    Having had a mmc which was discovered at the 12 week scan, I can empathise with how she must feel, but to be so negative (especially to her own daughter!) during someone else's pregnancy is just not on. There has to come a point where you put your bad experiences behind you and accept that you were unlucky but that doesn't mean that everyone else will be unlucky too.

    I admit that yes, sometimes even now I worry that I am jinxing this baby, but you can't live your life like that - you can't live in fear forever. I think your mum needs to understand that.

    Does she realise how much it upsets you?
  • I think she understands that, and is just worried for me in case that heppens, she always says how much she loves me adn would protect me against anything, but I tell her I'm a grown up and am strong and healthy and so is baby and all the tests and scans so far (I'm 26 weeks) have been excellent with no problems, so I'm very low risk. I keep telling her I don't have a unicornate uterus like her, but I think her experiences are hard to forgett. I'm just letting the comments roll off me, I'm not worried, hopefully my parents will start to get more excited nearesr the time! x
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