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Very, Very Tired & Depressed need help with baby daughter!

My baby daughter (she is 16 months and one day old. I am trying to get some advice.

I started to reduce her milk, as I breastfeed. I started to feel alot better for a few days, as she was going up to 14 hours without milk during the day, but still wants it at night.

I just want to give up completely as she is now playing up alot if I refuse her and even when I give her a feed, she won't necessarliy go back down, without getting up quite soon afterwards!:(

I've started to feel unwell, really sore breasts (expected!), but I feel really down and really tired and wore out!( I did do a P test, eventhough I had a period, just make sure, but it was negative!) I just wanted to know if anyone felt a bit wrung out and I have been getting some stomach and back pains as well! Don't want to contact health visitor, as mine is useless and will only blame me for not giving it up sooner!

I just want to be able to move on as, I trying to get on with things as my eight old son is playing up alot and really getting on my nerves! Not mention the constant worry about daily life, money, husband, my other children!

I really want another baby, but I don't want to wait another 7 years for another one and it is really soul distroying when your period comes, when you think you could of been pregnant! It just brings back old memories!

I just wish I could switch off the feeling and move on with my life and be happy with what I have, instead of having 'pipe dreams'!

Any advice would be great as I am, so tired I could cry!!!

I just feel that other people seem to get what they want and I can't, so why crave it!

Mandy XXX


  • Hi Mandy,

    Sending you lots of cyber hugs.

    I know how it feels to be constantly tired and feeling drained of energy, Charl is just over 2 and has only just these last two and a bit weeks started sleeping better (not sleeping through but only waking once instead of 3/4/5 or more times). Some days I could have cried, some days I did wondering why she wouldn't sleep when everyone else's children were. It is hard and sometimes I think we are hard on ourselves. Thinking no one else knows what it's like and wouldn't understand. You have to keep strong do what you have to do, but don't push yourself too far, give yourself realistic targets.

    I don't really know what else to say, other than we are always here for you to chat to.

    Take care, Zoe xx
  • Hi Mandy, I am sure I have read before that there is a hormonal link between stopping breastfeeding and actually feeling depressed it is the hormones again playing up im afraid. Im not surprised you are exhausted. My first two slept through early but Luka still wont and is in with us. I find it helps to break each thing up and deal with it indvidually otherwise you feel all these problems mounting up and getting on top of you. First to tackle is your daughter sleeping through I guess. However Im not sure what to advise you on this, as i only ever b/fed my first son and stopped at 6months. I am sure there are others on here who can help you better though. Good luck and take care xx
  • Hi Mandy,

    Firstly i would like to send you a big cyber hug and let you know that we are always here to help you.
    I have no experience of stpping b/feeding and am dreading the time when we decide to stop because i think it will be really difficult. Hollie is nearly 7 months and when we put her onto 3 meals a day she started sleeping through. Now she is back to waking at night, and although it is due to teething the only thing that settles her is milk. So i am afraid to say we are starting a bad habit which i know will be hard to break.

    Have you tried sending your hubby in to settle her at night when she wakes. I know that babies can smell milk on us so that may help you. And it may also help you if he does a night so that you can get some rest.
    Other than that i am at a loss as to what to say as i dont know what else you can do. Hopefully someone else will be able to help you better.

    Karen xx
  • Hi Mandy,

    Sorry you feel down. You have done very well with breastfeeding, I couldn't so I take my hat off to you. Hope things sort themselves out and get back to normal asap.
    I am ttc number three and really fed up as been testing ovu etc for a few months and I have bad PMT and tummy pain today.
    Take care, hope you feel better soon.
  • Thank you all so, so much!!! It's nice to know that there is someone there to listen.

    My husband works, 12 hour days/nights, so it is quite hard for him to help.

    She won't take a bottle as she went straight to a cup, I been offering her cows milk in a cup. but she has couple of sips, that she does not want to know, it's the same with the water, it gets really frustrating!!

    I wandering what to do next, as I do feel down and feeling like, no matter what I do she does not want to know, why do want anymore!

    I guess, I just have to wait it out and keep trying!

    Thank you all once again!



    If anyone does have any strange or any related symptoms, when they gave up breastfeeding that would be great!
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