have i got pnd?

When our new baby boy (Charlie) was 3 weeks we got told he has cystic fibrosis (cf). It came as a complete shock as we didn't even know we were carries and we have a healthy 20 month old. Since then its been like an emotional roller coaster. I always put a brave face on and sometimes i even feel like we can get through this. But most of the time i feel devastated. I feel like someone has come and taken the baby i gave birth too and replaced him with a sick baby. When i look at him i dont feel the same anymore. If he is not breastfeeding or asleep he cries. He screams all day. He looks so sad all the time. I feel so guilty but sometimes i blame him and feel like he has taken my life away. I'm never going to be happy because theres always going to be something missing in my life. We cant have any more children because they could have cf too and that breaks my heart. I just cant believe this has happened to me and im so so angry. I feel angry all the time. Charlie's life is going to be full of pain and hospital visits. Its already effected our other son Luke. I haven't got time for him because Charlie cries all the time and to be honest i cant be bothered anymore. Im exhausted and just want to be happy again.



Would anti depressants make me feel better? Thank you for your help.



Gemma