34weeks pregnant & just become single :(

Lauren04x · Sep 4, 2011 4:05PM

Im 21 & i'll be 34 weeks pregnant Tuesday & I've just split up with my partner as he was seeing someone but didn't have the balls to tell me. Im fine about it at the moment cause its his loss, but don't know if i'll be able to cope when babys here. he says he'll still support the baby, but Im not so sure, I've said his new girlfriend isn't seeing my baby & he's not happy about it, Im not being unfair am i?

Just want him to take an interest in the baby, he doesn't even ask how baby is & i doubt he will when i have my antenatal checkups. I've asked to meet him to discuss the baby & what's going to happen like at the hospital & money towards the upbringing, but he's too busy with his girlfriend

x

MyBs · Aug 8, 2011 6:08AM

I'm sure you'll be just fine when the baby arrives! Do you have close friends and family to help you?

I split up from my then boyfriend when i was still pregnant with my first and didnt look back! I was calm and relaxed without him around, so i feel it was the best situation.

He wasn't seeing anyone else and still wanted me back for well over 18 months after my son was born but even that didnt make him visit his son regularly!

I think basically if a man is going to be a good father, then he wont let a gf stand in the way of that. And if he's not a good father, would you want him around your child anyway?!

And i think you're absolutely right to say his new gf isnt seeing your baby, I dont think anyone with a brain would disagree!

I'd say a year or so down the line when he has got a good strong bond with the baby and if they are still together then maybe think about it.

Alice x

KazzieM · Aug 8, 2011 6:23AM

As a new mummy, you'll find you have a natural protective instinct over your baby and will cope with things you never thought possible. Friends and family are normally only too happy to lend their support when they know it's needed (don't be afraid to ask for it). As for your former partner and his new girlfriend, I'm amazed he even has the cheek to expect you to let him and her spend time alone with your baby. He's hurt your trust at a most critical time and needs to prove to you first and foremost that he himself is going to be a good father for your baby before he even thinks about introducing thrid parties you know nothing about. Make your hospital plans with your family/friends for now, you need to know you have the support you can rely upon, once baby is out safely then you can start discussing the access rights and child support. Best of wishes at a difficult time.

RachelandBabies · Sep 4, 2011 4:05PM

Hello, I just read this message and my heart goes out to you. This type of behavior makes me sick to my stomach. This is such an important time in your life, and you have been betrayed by the person you love. I was in exactly the same position and what I want to say is, you will be absolutely fine as a single parent, please trust me. The moment you hold your wee baby in your arms, nothing else in this whole world will matter. Becomming a Mum makes us women VERY strong, you'll suprise yourself, I know I did. If you ever want a chat, please holler! You are well within your rights to ask that this new (tramp) girl has nothing to do with your child, as you dont know her and its all too much too soon. These things take time, expecially with a new born. All that matters to this baby at the moment is Mum being kept healthy and all the baby will need is you and hopefully your ex will pull his finger out of his arse and step up to his parental responsibilities. Have faith and goodluck xxx

34weeks pregnant & just become single :(

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