Forum home Pregnancy Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

My Story

Hi all,

Im new here and i guess i was just looking for somewhere to put down in words what im going through and find people who are in the same situation.

Im currently going through my 2nd miscarriage. I'll tell you about my first to start with...

It happened in August last year. I was 7 weeks and 2 days pregnant when i started to spot. I went to the hospital the next day and had an emergency scan. We saw the heartbeat but they said i was only 6 weeks and 1 day gone... i knew this wasnt right. That weekend i attended a family wedding and was still bleeding and had started to cramp. On the monday the cramps got worse and i "passed" the baby at home. After 3 years on TTC i was devistated as you can imagine

It took us about another 6 months to conceive again. This time we used the clearblue fertility monitor and got pregant the first cycle using it. The pregancy seemed to be going well, i was having all the "normal" symptoms... sore breasts, going off certain foods etc and once i had passed the 8 week mark i started to relax a little and enjoy being pregnant. Then at 10 weeks and 1 day i started to spot again, i knew instantly that this was it... it was over. I went for a scan the next day and was told that there gestation sack was there but there was no heartbeat... my baby had stopped developting 5 weeks before. 5 weeks!! How could i not know??

Like i said i just wanted to get down in writing what was happening, im finding it really hard to talk about and i feel so numb. The first day after i knew the baby was gone i cried so much but now... now i just feel like its not really happening, like its not real. I want to wake up from this nighmare and still be pregnant. My 12 week scan should have been happening next friday and i really dont know how im going to cope with getting through the day never mind the next few weeks / months.

im going back to work tomorrow, im not sure if im ready but how long am i supposed to just sit around thinking about what has happened..?

Sorry to go on and thanks for reading (if you've got this far and not given up reading such a long post)

I would like to know how other people are coping?

Replies

  • So sorry to hear you're going through this, your story sounds very similair to mine , I had 2 missed miscarriages - like you I didn't understand how my body didn't know n carried on convincing me I was still pregnant ,  

    Take your time , you can't rush 'getting over these things ' I'm not sure you ever do , as you can see from my ticker I am now 36 weeks , but there's not a day that goes by that I don't think about the babies I lost , take good care of yourself , the girls on here have been an amazing support to me so I think you have come to the right place , 

    Sending you a big hug , we are here for you whenever you need to shout , cry , whatever x x 

  • Hi JCM.. So sorry to hear of your loss... I too suffered at missed miscarriage... Found out at 9 weeks that the baby had died about 6 week.. Waited another 1 1/2 weeks & still nothing happening so at 10 1/2 weeks i had a medical management. 

    Any miscarriage is just heartbreaking but missed miscarriages just seem particularly cruel!... Your body lets you go on thinking you're pregnant & as each week passes you believe you are 'safer' only to then find out the bad news.

    I know it must seem so hard at the moment... I know how dark those first few weeks felt for me... But you will get through it... Just let yourself grieve... Talk about what happened and how you are thinking and feeling as much as you can... It really does help.

    wishing you all the best x

  • Hi huni

    didnt want to read and run, i feel your pain and frustration i also went through this twice last year july 2013 and december 2013, i was and still am unsure why it happened, my first baby had stopped growing at around 5-6 weeks and i passed baby my self at home, the 2nd time round i was sent for early scans again and like you i knew i should have been around 8 weeks but baby was only 6 weeks but there he/she was with a heart beat yet i was still bleeding i knew it was not right! 2 weeks later i was in for another scan and was told baby had died, and i had the option to have a d&c so i took it, this was done christmas eve, christmas day was a bit of a blur for me, i tried to hold it together for my little boy but it was so hard, i just wanted to curl up and die! i couldnt understand why it was happening to me and thought it must have been some thing i was doing wrong!

    It does take time to heal, i was not going to give up! and in feb i got my bfp 3 days after my first m/c due date! this site has been a rock to me and the ladies on here are amazing, with out their support im not sure how i would have coped xx 

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