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Need Advice or Someone Who Can Understand

Hi! This is my first time to ever post on this website, or any website at all for that matter. I have never opened up to anyone about trying to conceive. It is a very hard subject for me because I feel like most people in my life cant relate. And another big reason is because I feel scared that if I admit I'm having problems that it just confirms it and everyone will know what I know, that I may never be a mom. That is the hardest thing for me to say, or even type. "I may never be a mom". I NEVER thought when I first started trying it would be this hard for me! I'm a very healthy young lady. I am just about to turn 22. I know that is a young age, I do. That's another reason I don't open up to people, because they instantly say 'You're so young, you have plenty of time" or worse, they'll laugh. I get that I have time, but me and my husband do not have the time or expenses for multiple doctor visits and numerous IVF treatments. We both have amazing jobs and I graduate in about 6 months from college. We've been trying to conceive for almost 2.5 years now and it's becoming hard to bear. My husband is 27 so he's very ready which makes me feel even more pressure. I want so badly to tell him hes going to be a dad. I want to tell his mom she will get her first grandchild. I dream about it. All I've ever wanted to be is a mom. What's worse is its becoming hard to even get on facebook because it seems like everytime I do, another one of my friends or family members is pregnant. I'm happy for them, don't get me wrong. I just feel so envious that it disgusts me, because I'm not that person. My husband is so supportive and always tells me its going to happen and I shouldn't worry, but how can I not? I guess I just need a little advice.. maybe weird ways you got pregnant or maybe just encouraging stories like how long it took you. Or how you cope with seeing everyone around you get pregnant and you keep failing at doing the one thing it feels like your meant to do as a woman. (sorry this was so long!) Thanks in advance

Replies

  • Hi kk tcc and everything is hard and stressful weather you are 22 or 42. The thing you have got on your side is that if you need extra help to conceive you have more time and it's more likely to work. i suffered for 8 years of infertility with my first husband when I was around your age. I now have 2 beautiful boys with my second husband and ttc #3. A friend of mine went 5 years without conceiving, she and her husband decided to stop trying and then out of the blue she found out she was pregnant. Sometimes the problem can be stressing about if it will happen. There are a few things you can do for yourself without going to the doctor. Do you know if you are ovulating? 

  • it's so amazing to hear that you have been blessed with children after waiting, and same for your friend. That brings  a lot of comfort! I am ovulating and everything seems normal my doctor said. I went in for a normal check up and pap and she told me everything felt normal to her and seemed fine. however, I wasn't there for fertility issues. I have very regular cycles as well. And we've thought things through about maybe it being him, but we got him a at home kit to check and it turned out fine, which is a blessing of course! 

  • It sounds good there doesn't seam to be any issues could just possibly the the stress and worry of ttc that's stopping it actually happening ? Xx

  • I really do stress too much about everything especially this! Any suggestions on how to try without trying? I really do wish I could just never think about it, and it just happen but it's so hard 

  • It's easier said than done and you may not want to go with my advice. I would say try to focus on something else instead of ttc. Why not concentrate on your graduation in 6 months and save for a really nice holiday to celebrate graduating ? In the mean time have a break from ttc, not try to stop it but just enjoy life for a few months and say if it happens it happens if it doesn't I will worry about it after graduating. I'm not sure if I'm making sense but I know what I'm trying to say. Sorry xx

  • By the way I'm just like you I worry about how much I worry lol xx

  • you make total sense! Maybe  can plan a cruise or something haha never done that before :) thank you 

  • A cruise sounds amazing I have never done one either. Xx

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