Going into panic mode!

Hi ladies. I feel like I'm going crazy. I'm relatively new to this TTC business, this is only our second cycle of trying. I know it can take months and I'm totally prepared for that. We also have additional issues in the form of a genetic problem in my OH's side of the family which means I have a 50% chance of miscarrying any baby we do conceive. I've got my head round this and know that we could be in for a rough journey.

However this morning I went into a huge panic. The first cycle, I was using an OPK (clear blue dual hormone), got the high and peak readings as expected, DtD multiple times around then and, although my period was later than expected, it did arrive. So no luck that month, fine.

I decided this month that, because of the fact that it might take us longer than normal anyway to have a successful pregnancy, I didn't want to miss any months through poor ovulation calculation so I started temping too (not into the whole CM analysis...). I got high readings on my OPK, started DTD, peak reading on Saturday morning, all good, but this morning I was hoping for a temperature increase but there's nothing.

I then started googling it and am now panicking that I am not actually ovulating, on top of all the genetic issues. I know it's early in the process etc but just the thought of yet another potential issue sent me into meltdown.

I'm quite big so am also gonna be focussing on losing weight as that can only help. I'm so sorry for the essay but I've been keeping this all to myself and this morning just felt like I tipped over the edge into panic. 😔 just so desperately want a little baby.