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Is it ok to call a pregnant person fat?... especially knowing their struggles?

I adore my family and my marital family equally but all of them seem to think its funny or acceptable to call me fat during this pregnancy. I have suffered with an eating disorder since i was 15 (im now 32) and was clinically diagnosed with bulimia last year and had a stint on hospital it got so bad. I have really turned a corner since then and have never felt better that once i discovered i was expecting it was even more motivation to get back on track. Im so proud of myself BUT now im heavily pregnant my family and extended family all think its ok to call me names like "fat cow" "shes as far gone as you n shes no where near as fat as you" "u definitely dont watch that your eating now look at the size of you"

Its very hard not to slip back into the old ways but when i say something im just being overly sensitive. Am i right in feeling this or do i need to chill out?

Chez xx

Replies

  • It is never ok to insult someone like that. The fact about us is that every each one of us (people on this planet) has different struggles and you can never truly understand it because even if you had similar problems, you (as a different person) will cope with them in a different manner. If I were you I would be even more angry about it - I mean come on, 'fat cow' - really? Family should support you, not throw stones at you.

    Ah this makes me mad :/

  • Im glad iv been validated in my feelings so thank you for your reply. So irritating as in the OH eyes his family can do no wrong... their just pointing out im bigger bcoz they care! Im too sensitive. But if i say ok im heavily pregnant but whats ur excuse?! as the whole family are overweight id be a big bitch. Cant work it out im growing a person inside me n im fat but their eating crap n thats ok

  • People unfortunately tend to be 'smart' and act like some kind of mentors unless it's not their problems we're talking about. This makes me furious - if you are so willing to point out somebody's mistake, first you should be sure you are 100% ok in the matter you're discussing. Otherwise you're nothing but a hypocrit. And there's nothing worse than such people.

    It sound's bad, but you shouldn't be upset about what they're saying - they are in no position to judge you.

  • There is never an ok time to call someone fat.

    My first pregnancy I barely looked pregnant as I was so sick and this time round I'm enjoying having my bump but my MIL keeps pointing out how I'm so big this time and I want to slap her.

    If I was you I'd have said the bitchy comment already lol

  • Hi Mommy to be... 

    My only advise coming from someone who has an eating disorder myself..obesity(it might not be the same as yours but none the less it is a battle i am fighting myself)

    Your are NOT FAT! You are beautiful and glowing and housing a precious little person who you will be gifting to your family and your in laws, a precious new member of the family.

    You can eat what ever you want (provided it is safe for you and baby) and as much as you want too.

    Dont let people that have no savvy tell you you need to watch what you are eating.

    All pregnant woman are aloud to have freak out moments.. so if they happen to mention anything again to you tell them to get over themselves.. you are pregnant and you are going to give your baby what ever nutrient it needs and therefore you will treat yourself to what yummy goodness you can get your hands on. 

    You are an amazing woman fighting your battle and overcoming it. And when your little one is bigger you will be able to teach them how not to judge someone based on their appearance or weight. 

    Enjoy being a bit rounder( then you are use to), pregnant and feisty.. as soon as baba is here and breast feeding you will be back to your pre-mommy frame in no time and they can all your dust!image

    good luckimage

  • It sounds like they love you very much. I am being sarcastic. I can´t understand how can they call you a fat cow. Besides, it is their blood you are carrying inside of you, a relative, grandchild, niece to someone of them. Do they know you had a eating disorder? If they do know, then they all have some mental issues. Or they don´t care about you. Otherwise, I can´t see other explanation. Tell them how it really hurts you, maybe they will stop.

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