am I being a cow?
Hi mummies and bumps
I dont know if its just me having high expectations, but my husband just doesnt seem excited about the baby. I always seem to feel really let down and disappointed in his reactions to things, like if the baby's kicking I have to nag him to feel it and when he does he doesnt say anything so I ask him if he felt it and he goes "yeah" but he seems to have no reaction. Is it just mine or are some other peoples Oh's like this? I love him so much and I know he loves me, he works really hard to pay the bills and have money left over so we can do things we enjoy and buy nice things for the baby but its not all about money, I'd just love some show of emotion! I feel really guilty saying all of this but I just cant help feeling let down, he doesnt talk to my bump or anything like that but he is perfectly happy to talk about the baby. I just imagined the pregnancy being a really exciting time for us both and bringing us closer together but so far I feel kind of alone in it all. Am I just being hormonal?
xxx
I dont know if its just me having high expectations, but my husband just doesnt seem excited about the baby. I always seem to feel really let down and disappointed in his reactions to things, like if the baby's kicking I have to nag him to feel it and when he does he doesnt say anything so I ask him if he felt it and he goes "yeah" but he seems to have no reaction. Is it just mine or are some other peoples Oh's like this? I love him so much and I know he loves me, he works really hard to pay the bills and have money left over so we can do things we enjoy and buy nice things for the baby but its not all about money, I'd just love some show of emotion! I feel really guilty saying all of this but I just cant help feeling let down, he doesnt talk to my bump or anything like that but he is perfectly happy to talk about the baby. I just imagined the pregnancy being a really exciting time for us both and bringing us closer together but so far I feel kind of alone in it all. Am I just being hormonal?
xxx
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Replies
Think its a man thing! My OH is defo like yours but when I have really been worried or scared he pulled through and showed he really does care! I have had to put my OHs hand on bump and repeat constantly - can you feel him? Response - course I can!
Honestly, your man will come through for you when you least expect it!!!!
xxx
My hubby won't talk to bump either but I know that it is because he feels silly xxx
I made the effort to go with him for dinner at the MIL's house-which believe me is an effort!! We get there to find he has agreed to fit her kitchen, I remain calm-though it's keeping my children up late and just mention on the way home that I would prefer to be warned next time and he goes all nasty!!
I mean, it's uncomfortable, I want to be home in my comfy clothes and I'm tired-instead I'm dealing with his mother-AAARRRGGHH!!
Yeah am sure it will!!!
12 years is a big gap between kids, i think we've forgotten what it was like first time round. But am sure it will all come flooding back.
Although sometimes I have to force him to feel bump move or just watch it (I think he gets bored waiting for something to happen whereas I could sit there for ages until lo moves) a while ago I was cuddling him in the morning and he felt the baby move through his back and he told everyone at work that day. xxxx
lol but when it comes to touching bump it's fine unless bump decided to move :L then I get an 'Errr it's like a snake uncoiling' & he won't talk to bump because he feels silly... even tho the MW told him baby could hear him..
I think just for fellas they know it's happening but for us it's already happened.. they wait for the birth for it to be really real... you think we carry these (huge in my case) bumps around ALL day and it's all anyone every talks to us about (strangers and all), we have all the symptoms and aches and pains... they only have to really think about it when it pop's into there heads! :L
He show's it I think but just maybe in diffrent ways, He has already brought home a Football Kit.. and talks excitedly about playing foot ball, and buying toys, and taking him on holiday.. he provides, he looks after me emotionally and in turn that his way of looking after baby too..
lol and when I think about it sometimes my belly looks like it has an alian inside it... the whole concept of having a whole human being inside of another is pretty strange even tho it is perfectly natrual...
I'm sure he'll fall in love with baby when baby is born because thats really when he gets to meet them!!
I never personally understood pregnancy in its true entirety like I have since i've been pregnant.. I walked to the high street and back sat with OH which in total took about 15 mins ( I was stopping every two) I burst into tears when I got home because 'i just wasn't able for it' & the men in the house just looked at me whereas my OH's sister started to cry looking at me (she has had 4 babies) and said she remembers that feeling!
maybe just mention how you feel about it all, might not do a complete U turn but he may take it on board! xxx