Forum home Pregnancy Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

Gave birth to my sleeping beautiful boy xx



  • Hey so ive been back back at work 3 weeks now. Over all it's not to bad I had a really bad week last week as I was speaking to a parent who is 34 weeks pregnant and she is suffering with spd like I did I said to her it will all be worth it in the end and my words just made me break down I went to the doctors on the Tuesday as I was getting really low he was referring me for counselling he was supposed to get back to me about the referral but still hasn't! 

    We have decided we are going to make a complaint with PALS so there is an investigation everyone has told us we should even the midwife that was there when we found out jacob had died. I think it was easier for me to think it just happened and things wouldnt or couldn't have been any different but I realise that's not the case they didn't follow correct procedures and if I can help it from not happening again then it will be worth it.

    i had the first innocent stranger say to me the other day when are you going to have another one and when I awkwardly said not yet he very loudly and repeatedly said you can't just have one my heart felt like it was going to jump out of my chest. 

    How are you getting on philisda? Hope your husband is recovering well!!


  • Hi Chamilto

    Good to hear that you are back at work. I found it very helpful to be doing something else after I lost Huw. I just couldn't stand being alone with my thoughts! 

    Yes I totally think you should go to PALS and make a complaint. If they haven't followed procedure then they need to investigate and put in strategies to prevent future issues. I'm so sorry to hear that this was also a factor in your case.

    I had my first awkward moment when someone I know from work asked me how my baby was doing. It was really hard as I teared up and had to tell her. Didn't help that I was telling her at the time we weren't going to renew her service contract. So hard. I think in the beginning you expect these incidents to happen but as time goes on you really get caught out and it almost hits you harder as you don't expect it.

    I've come to the realisation that I'm just not ready yet to have another baby. I was desperate to be pregnant again after I lost Huw but I'm just not mentally strong enough at the moment. I think that everyone is ready at different times so you need to do what's right for you. 

    My husband is doing really well at the moment. He is able to talk more and starting to be able to write short texts and messages etc. He passed an eye test yesterday and despite his vision been affected after his stoke his vision is good enough to return to driving. But as his arm is still quite weak he has to pass a driving test before he can start driving again. But it's all looking very positive. We have booked our flights and we are finally moving to Australia in October. I'm looking forward to a fresh start for 2017 and put this horrible year behind us.

  • sorry for your losses. I also had a little boy come into the world sleeping. we went on holiday going with every thing to look forward to and coming back with nothing i was 21 weeks  we bringing him back to be with us at home to give him a send of :,( x

  • So sorry to hear that sammy what was your little boys name? i hope it won't take long to bring him home xxxx

  • we called him Lennie-Kai Yeah it's been 2 weeks Already but they said be a few days  then be home  x

  • that is a lovely name, where were you if you don't mind me asking? 

    how are you feeling? The first few weeks are the hardest, I still have difficult days and not a day goes by that I don't think of Jacob but it does get easier to handle I guess you get used to the pain? Xxxxx

  • Hi Sammy2016, we're so glad you found this thread and are sending you our love.

    Hi Chamilto, we just wanted to say we often think of you and your Jacob too. x

  • We were over on holiday in benidorm  yeah hope so  but we couldn't leave him over there least we have a place to go to see him and have a chat :) x

  • I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy Ollie sleeping 2 weeks ago, the pain, guilt and anger are still so raw, i cant see a way out! I need to be a mum, im almost impatient, I should of taken home my baby but now im empty. I dont know where to turn.

  • imageI know this is a super old thread but I just wanted to give everyone some hope. In April this year I had a beautiful healthy, full term baby boy, who we named Ollie. While the loss of our Huw will never go away, we have learnt to live with it and now have happiness and joy, once again, in our life. For any other mumma's who have a loss, there is hope, I know it doesn't feel like it at the time, but happiness does return ♥️

  • Phillisdsa, thank you SO much for coming back to this thread and telling us about your beautiful son Ollie. It will really give so many women hope who have been through something similar to you. How is your husband doing these days too? 

  • Thanks for your message Danielle! Hubby is also doing much better. Has been studying for the past 2 years and is finishing in the next few weeks and is now looking for work! It's taken over 2 years but we are slowly getting our lives back on track! Such a relief and we have happiness again, which has been missing for so long. It's one of thoes things you don't realise is gone until you get it back 😀

  • It really is so lovely to see your name pop up Phillis. And we're so happy to read about your husbands road to recovery - life sounds good for you, and so it should be after the time you had. ❤️

  • imageI also had my rainbow in 2017, 10 months after I had her brother, little Bella was born at 37 weeks and had her own battle to overcome which was very scary. She'll never replace my son but she has filled those empty arms and gives me a reason to live.

Sign In or Register to comment.

Featured Discussions