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I’m totally unsure if this is harassment or not and what to do if it is/isn’t. 

My husband and I have been separated for almost two years. 
We went to court and it was agreed L (3 year old girl) wouldn’t stay with him until next summer earliest.
He wants to introduce our three year old to his boyfriend and girlfriend. 
He keeps nagging me to take her to his house (my concern is that he always used to leave pills all over the house - on the floor, sides, in bags and so on and I don’t want my daughter taking pills accidentally. 
Contact was agreed but then a few were missed because of L being ill and not wanting to go out with him so she stayed with me. One was missed because of a massive panic attack I had over him and one he wanted to take her after she did her ballet show but she was too tired and didn’t want to leave me. 

He is constantly texting me and threatening me or else messaging my solicitors who then contact me and I am not sure how much I can deal with ..... is this harassment? What do I do? 



  • Ok first of all I totally understand how you feel as a mother. But you have to see it from his point of view. He wants to see his child and as much as your reasons are genuine he will not see it that way. Unfortunately you cannot control how he lives his life and he will want to introduce people to your child. I would suggest maybe going to mediation again. To try and sort out a way for him to see you daughter that you would be happy with. If you have concerns about pills maybe speak to social services and ask for some support and advice. He could maybe start by meeting you at a soft play and you could drop her off and pick her up from there or if you do go to mediation you could arrange a contact centre to start with to build the relationship. You need to think about how your daughter will feel as she grows up if you do not support contact.

    he shouldn't be threatening you and ultimately if he is unhappy with court arrangements he can ask to go to mediation or court himself. If you agreed to mediation you could speak in a controlled environment and maybe compromise. If his calls and texts bother you just block him. Explain that you don't want to argue and if he cant be nice you will block him and have to find a different form of communication. This is what the police would recommend. You will get very little support from police etc unless you have shown some kind of effort to avoid the harassment.  
  • It definitely is harassment! You should contact the police, he's harassing you and threatening you - that's two offences. 
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