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Embarrassing..... husband watching porn

I’m a little bit embarrasses about this so please be nice....
me and my hubby have always had a good sex life but since we had our second child he is watching a lot of porn.... we have sex I have always done everything in the bedroom and now I just don’t feel good enough.... he says he doesn’t watch it but I know he does.... I just feel devastated I hate myself and how I look now I feel so ugly..... I’ve worked my ass off and lost three stone yet he’s still watching the porn why can’t I just be good enough? I’ve even watched it with him but no still not good enough :( I’m just melting and have no one to talk to please help me 

Replies

  • FieldyxxFieldyxx Regular
    edited Dec 21, 2019 8:15AM
    😔😔
    I know your worried its you but actually i think men are lazy and it's just an easy way of sorting themselves out and not having to spend time pleasing you and returning the favour!! I havent got children yet but I can imagine it's harder to find time together but maybe you could both have a good date! 

    But you do need to find a way of  making yourself feel good and confident again as we need to feel that about ourselves or sex won't be the same until you can get some of that back! Could you get your hair done? Or eye lashes? Tan? Nails? New undies? Anything that you know will make you feel more confident. My is definitely tan! I hate being pale in The winter and feel so much better being naked with some fake tan on. 

    Hope this helps hun 😘xx


  • Thanks hun yeah I’m a red head so don’t tan... I love a spray tan 

    yeah it is harder we never get a sitter but my three year old has nursery and goes to sleep at 7 every night whereas my four month old is always there and bed time is unpredictable.... he says he’s enjoying the sex at the mo but still watches porn a lot .... I used to feel amazing in the bedroom not so much anymore ... I thought maybe if I got back to a good weight he wouldn’t be interested in porn you know....it’s hard I used to do my makeup every day with two kids there’s not much time to look after myself 
  • Are you sure he hasn't always watched it but you are just finding out? My hubby watches it and so do I. Sometimes I do it just for a quick release especially when busy. 
    I'm sure your hubby still finds you attractive and is just looking for a quick release. But please work on ur self esteem and well done on the weight loss. 
  • Thankyou I’m trying really hard now!! 
  • We had a big chat!! I told him I can’t stop him and it’s his choice but I Atleast can explain my feelings!! I told him that I feel really ugly I can’t feel sexy with my clothes off when he’s spending all this time looking at women with perfect bodies I told him I no longer feel secure as now we have secrets I told him he will just have to bare with me in the bedroom as I can’t be the same person right now.... I can’t dress up as a secretary or any of my costumes when for all I know he’s just had a wank that day to someone who pulls it off much better I don’t feel comfortable I would feel like a joke!! He can have porn for role play and costumes and exciting sex positions I need time to work on me!! 
  • Maybe it is related to his stress. Remember we women relieve stress? We cry into a pillow for a sad film, speaking to our friends, chatting here :), overeating with sweets, go shopping, have a spa day, or changing our image ... Men don’t have this kind of behavior, so they “bury” their heads in pornography. 
  • I sympathise that you find this upsetting, but I honestly wouldn't take this as any indication that there's anything wrong with you or that you're not enough. A lot of men watch porn in relationships
  • I think you should try some different-sex pose with him  
  • lol great suggestion  :#:D
  • lol great suggestion  :#:D
    hahahah I think you agree to me
  • lol great suggestion  :#:D
    Bcz I am a man and I know what men actually want or need
  • lol great suggestion  :#:D
    Bcz I am a man and I know what men actually want or need
    hahaha!
  • Well, not only yours does that, so it's nothing to be ashamed about
  • Don't think this is something to be embarrassed about xx
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