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Hi there,
You seem to have a level head about things which can only be a good thing - babies are very receptive to your emotions. I am 32 weeks tomorrow and have been through so many different emotions from the 'am I really pregnant' feeling to the 'WHY CAN'T I SLEEP' feeling. I had to have a scan at 6 weeks (as soon as I found out I was pregnant) because I was getting really bad abdomen pains. If the Midwife had just explained that it was just my uterus growing I wouldn't have been nearly as scared.

Just remember there are a lot of things they don't tell you about pregnancy and that stress is not good for you.

If you need any support or just a chat look me up and I'll be happy to help you in any way I can.

Take care and rest easy!!

Vikki xx


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    [Modified by: removed on 15 September 2009 14:47:13 ]
  • i think you need to consider the lo and you will know what to do. only you know if you van trust him or not to believe what he says but the ex is a bitch perhaps you should get them both together and confront her and see how she reacts good luck though sweetie its a horrible thing to go through at this time when your prob feel 10x more emotional than norm x x
  • thanks b. i no that prob took you forever to read through, but thanks for doing it. xxx
  • thanks b. i no that prob took you forever to read through, but thanks for doing it. xxx
  • Hi there I think that you need to give your man another chance to show you how much he cares. If he didn't want you and the baby why hasn't he just walked out already? My husband's ex sounds alot like the bitch you descirbe, she is always playing stupid games like thet. For instance just before our wedding she told his cousin that no one in the family liked her and she was the black she of the family - believe me this nearly split the family in two and we had to sort out all the mess that she caused, luckly no one believed her in the end but could have been so much worse. Think you and your man need to have a heart to heart and stand as a united team and show her that her games won't work! She sounds just like a right cow!!! Hope it all gets better and try not to worry too much. (easier said than done I know), if you want to chat just shout!
  • From seeing some of your previous posts - she is a complete cow who will stop at nothing to split the pair of you up!
    I think in your heart you know your oh does want to be with you but he is petrified for poor little demi (as I know you are!)

    From what I can imagine - she has set him up BIG TIME. People dont usually have their phones ready to record at the drop of a hat and she is a schemer sooo ...........!
    I may be wrong but only you know him and her and who would you really believe? Would you want her to win and split you up if it is just a scheme?
    Take care, Love Lee xxxxx
  • see thats it. it feels like this big competition. honestly i amazed i ever managed to get pregnant we barely ever have sex, and it seems ever since everything is just going wrong. it took j a while to come round to the fact i was habing our baby an because of th expierence he had with her (she went ou with her mates as soon as he got home, and he was left all night and all weekend to hold the baby) and i think at first he taught i would do that. he knows now that would never happen, because he has seen how i am abou having htis baby (estatic) and id had to think this is just some stupid competition for her.

    i know it sounds stupid and immature, but sometimes i just want to act like her you know? give her a taste of her own medicine, but then i look at demi and jason and know its not worth it.

    either way, its down to jason now. she is still texting me all day, saying how she has more, and i dying to say send them to me, but at the same time to her it will look likeshe is winnin as i havent talked to her since last week, and didnt even give her a reaction to the recording she sent.

    in a way, i want to hear more, so i can see for myself if there are any more, in another way i dont want to incase it upsets jason and incase i hear something jason can't wriggle out of.
  • Oh god you poor love... she does sound like a bitch, but what ever came before hand in the convo he still said those very hurtful things... are you going to spend your whole time fretting that maybe he ment it??
    I know if it were me I would want to forgive him and think that everything could be okay, but in all honesty I think the not knowing would be enough to wreck the relationship, it would be going around in my head that whatever she did or does he said those things... for me the trust would be gone which would only cause more anxioty, she did send them to you to upset you and get between you but it's the mere fact that she was able to get him to say those things... for me I am a suspitious person and would think to be prepared to record there must of been a simular conversation before hand for her to pre-empt that it could be repeated??

    I am not saying any of this to worry you luv, your in such a hard possition right now, i am just explaining the things that I think would be running thru my head... if she thinks she hasn't a reaction perpahps she will send you more could you just delete them without listening even if it means your in the dark?

    you cant make someone want you even if you really really want them too, I learned that the hard way.. Id suggest spending time on your own before you make any rash decisions... tell him you want a break for a while.. and see what he does with the time.. does he try to win you back or go running right to her... I know that it is a dangerous risk to take but I think at least you would know where you truely stand and if it's you he choses Id put some very firm ground rules about what acptable behaviour within your relationship... why does he need to discuss anything with her apart from the child? how does she have your number?

    this maybe hard to think about especially if you want him to sweet talk you and for things to 'be okay' but will they??

    can you trust him? only you know what the realtionship is worth and can only do what is right for you and the little one!

    please let me know how you get on sugar!?? xxx
  • why not give him the chance to prove himself by moving to Ireland with you? - it will show his commitment to the relationship and put some much needed space between him and his ex.
  • hi redpod. just wanted to let you know thats not an option, OH mother died yrs ago and al he has left is father and daughter and close family here. he would never leave dad and daughter to go ireland.

    and thanks it_must_be_love for your comment, i have been posting whats going on for the past few eeks here and everyone has been so great. Hope you guys dont think im using the website for conselling, its just getting it out of my head and onto somewhere helps me think, and its great to hear when someone agrees your not just going crazy.
  • Hi i think you should give him the benefit of the doubt as to me he said it but not in the way the ex is making out.She sounds like a fight stirring cow! I f he didnt want to be with you and have this baby why would he still be with you? He could of left and ended all the stress, which you dont need.
    You must love him to go through with and put up with all this, you should get her and him in the same room and have it out and see what both their reactions are.Good luck, take care.
    vikki xx
  • no problem babes EVERY realtionship has problems particularly if there is an added stress factor and a baby as beautiful as they are can controbute! that that spitful ex of his will most defo... have you spoken to fella about what she hopes to gain from doing all this??
    you do sound like you love him, sometimes fellas just get a bit spooked... doesn't mean they dont want it!! I talked to my fella when I first got pg and we have been trying for ages and he found it really hard that from the start really apart from the choices I give him he has no say! which is awful but is true across the board! maybe he just needs a little time to settle with the idea?
    I think most prob if it was me id do what Vikki R has said about getting the pair of them in the room... then you know where you stand!

    I dont think your using this place at all of course this forum is here to support thru what ever pregnant ladies are facing and I bet as sad as it is you wont be the only one going thru this or having been thru it, so its a good place to come to for advice!

    you take care of your self love ... wont you... and let us know how your getting on! xx
  • Sorry for butting in but reading that to me it sounded like your oh is telling the truth. This ex seems very scheeming and good at it too, her sole aim is to split you two up - i've read one or two of your posts before about the lengths this woman has gone too - and what your oh said does sound hurtful when edited down and played on its own, but put it into the context as he says it happens then it wasn't supposed to be hurtful, he was saying do you want me to say those things? because i won't say them...

    I think you should give him chance to prove himself, but something needs doing bout this woman - i'm sure from a previous post you've said about your oh going for full custody of his lil girl, could be a solution. You don't need this stress right now hunni, don't lower yourself to her standards and don't allow her to send you more twisted recordings which she could have edited to suit her aim!! I never have my phone ready to record and only someone who's planning something would have it recording at such a time, she was obviously baiting him.

    Chin up xx
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