🚨 Advance warning 🚨 This forum will be closing on 1st May – please see our pinned thread for more information.
Really upset about scan
Hi girlies
Well I had my 20 week scan this morning, something I was really excited about because I so wanted to see the baby, but it was absolutley terrible. The Dr scanning me was really abrupt and very cold if I asked a question and I had no idea what part of the baby was what! Because my first child was born with a rare and life threatning heart condition, this baby naturally has to be checked for it and thank goodness all is looking good this time but I thought that because I was having a normal 20 week scan at the same time as the cardiac scan I thought she would talk me through what was what but she didnt, she looked at the heart and then the baby without explaining a thing so I was just left to guess what was what, and when you dont even know what your looking at its hard! Plus, as soon as I got in I asked if I could have a picture for my husband (he couldnt make this one) so she knew I wanted a picture but she just took the last shot and gave me that and I dont have a clue what it is! I saw different parts of the baby, like its fingers and legs, but she didnt zoom out and give me a picture of the whole baby so to be honest, I feel like I have random parts of baby floating around disconnected inside me! I feel so disappointed about the whole experience and really uspet that i didnt see my baby, Anyone else had this and if so what did you do? Can you get another scan?
xxxx
0
Replies
i know it must be so dissapointing for you but my 20 wk scan was a bit of a let down compared to the 12 wk one. Although it wasn't anything like what you had they weren't really able to zoom out and show us the whole baby like they did at the first one.
i don't know about getting another scan? i guess they'd probably say that the sonographer was checked everything that they needed to. We were told that my placenta was low and so i have to have another scan at around 34 wks, it doesn't sound like anything like this was said to you but maybe it's worth asking your midwife if there is any chance that you might get another one.
it's such a shame though when you build yourself up to something.. I don't know if i've been any help or jst waffled on a bit but didn't want you to think that no one had taken any notice
Anyway I've lost the will to retype it all and give the full story but esentially I've had the same experience. My sonographer at my first scan was horrid. She was abrupt and miserable and excluded me and hubby from whole process. This is my first ever pregnancy and so my first ever scan and we were so excited and she just tried to make us feel stupid. (but she didn't succeed) however she did manage to ruin the whole experience for us. baby was too small to get a good pic but I knew I'd be getting another chance at the 20 week scan and also I was going for a private NT scan at 12 weeks. When she gave me the dates I wanted to discuss them because I knew the date she gave me couldn't be right because I knew when we'd last had sex but she just wasn't prepared to discuss at all.
Then I went for my private scan which was a real pleasure. the consultant was really helpful, explianed absolutely everything and looked so happy throughout you'd have thought he was the father!! He gave me some great pics and he actually said - "let's get some good pics while baby is this position". A real joy!
Then came my 20 week scan and to our horror we had the same sonograpger and she was a complete misery again. She started to scan me and hadn't asked if we wanted to know the sex and so I had to interupt and tell her we didn't so that she could tell me to look away if I needed to. Then she carried on in silence so I interupted her again to tell her that I wanted her to explain what she was seeing and doing at each stage. She looked so miffed to be asked but did it anyway although she did keep saying "that's his ..." and "that's his .." I'm sure she was doing it on purpose. I can't belive she hasn't developed a neutral way of explaining (or maybe I can since she obviously never does it!). Just like with you she gave me a crap picture taken at the end and you wouldn't even know it was a baby! If it weren't for my bupa scan I wouldn't have a decent photo!
As it happens I have to go for another scan at 34 weerks because of low-lying placenta but I am going to speak to my midwife on Thursday when I have my next antenatal to complain informally and ask if she can make sure I don't have the same sonographer next time because she was just so rude to us.
I'm convinced she disliked me because she usually just gets on with it and people are too taken aback and emotional to say anything to her (I was the first time but was prepared the second). Also because when I first saw her she knew from my notes I was going for a private scan and she also has a clinic doing private scans and told me about it but I said I wasn't interested because I was going to Bristol for it. When I've had the baby I'm going to write to the NHS Trust for my area and complain that she is advertising her clinic in the waiting area but they don't advertise any others which is essentially recomending or endorsing her but no-o else.
I'll let you know what my MW says on Thursday
(oops I managed to type a long one after all!!!)
28+2
xxxx
They usually deal with complaints I think and see if things can be sorted before they escalate further!!!
But there is no excuse for them to be rude. Unfortunately the only way to have sorted it out and get a nice picture would have been to complain at the time and refuse to pay for the photo until she got you a good one. I guess its a bit late now so all you can really do it make a complaint against her and hope that it helps her future patients.
xxx
xx
It can't do any harm to send a letter to the hospital explaining how you're feeling. But I also see what Mrs T is saying. You're lucky enough to be given a 20 wk scan, I don't get one where I live. And I suppose so long as everything was OK with the baby, after all it is an anomoly scan, then the hospital have done their job. Although a little bedside manner wouldn't go a miss! Like everyone else says, you get the special treatment with a private scan, just goes to show you get what you pay for..... S x
xxx
sorry to rant n rave but she shud of explined to u and gave u a better pik. u shud ask for another pik i mean i live in luton n scan piks are 5pound each and u dnt wanna pay and get a pik of sumit thats blury, xxxxx