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Nearly had a heart attack!

Recently... Hubby told me that his Aunt would be bringing his Nana "down to stay" (those were his words) for a week when the baby is here!!! imageimageimage

I was like whoah! Hold on! Nobody is coming to stay for a week when the baby first gets here! (Hubby and I have always been in agreement on this - we want the time together, just us 3, with my Mum as the exception if we need her).

Anyway, thankfully he back-tracked and said "oh no don't worry, she's staying at Auntie T's" (she lives about 20-mins from us - his Nana's sister)

Phew - I seriously nearly keeled over!

Its lovely his Nana will be around for a week but also quite annoying as when they (the two old ladies bless em!) want to come and visit the baby; hubby will have to go and fetch them etc. (they can't get here on their own) and I am worried whether I will cope on my own in those first few weeks!!!

Hubby's family are totally dis-interested in the baby generally though - so I am actually quite grateful his Nana is interested enough to come and stay nearby for a week.

Joo xxx
29+4

Replies

  • i'm having the same sort of problem but with my mum, me and my mum have a difficult relationship at the best of times, and the other day said, i've got a week of at the end of march so if pip comes then i can come and stay for the week!!! Now i know to a lot of ladies this would be fab, but i'd end up killing her and burying her in the garden, so pip has to come on time. My mum is intrested in her and keeps buying her more clothes then she'll ever wear but she's a difficult women. When i mc last year she told me it had upset her so much that she had to go on anti depresants and that it was all my fault!! Took me a long time to tell her about my second mc, luckily i have a fantastic dad. My dh has said if my mum moves in he's moving out for the week :roll:
    xx
  • wahhh theyll tell you to let baby cry"as it never hurt them"tell you to "get baby out in fresh air"(even if you have 45 stitches! and that breast is best!! i feel for you ,hope its goes ok!

    http://bd.lilypie.com/CGsh0/.png



  • I dont think i could cope with anyone other than my three year old and my partner in the house right after id given birth!! i feel for you both, hope it goes okay.

    p.s girlinleeds...im from leeds too, Horsforth, where abouts are you? what hospital you at?

    XxXxX
  • why do people feel its ok to just invite themselves to stay at your house? i can see how its infuriating lol
    good luck ladies!
    lau xxxxx
  • I can totally sympathise with this so you are not alone!

    Our parents both live 3 hours away (in different directions) and I don't think I want either staying with us in the first week or so. They don't really have anywhere else to stay though, as we don't have any family locally, so I don't know what we will do.

    My mum naively thought I might ask her to be with me during labour, but as she only contacts me when she feels like it I wonder why she ever thought I'd want this! Families are such hard work and both hubby and I have got odd relationships with ours but stupidly still seem to crave their affections...

    Hopefully we will better a better family to our own children.

  • Oh god I dont think I could cope with grandparents staying!

    We saw SIL and BIL this weekend with their newborn and one of the days 'Nana' came to see baby. I love this woman she is wonderful but she drove me mad with all her baby opinions- and the baby wasnt even mine!!!

    She was very opinionated on dummies/ feeding- every 4 hours, not before and not after, 4hrs ON THE DOT!!/ what to dress them in/ how to recover from the birth/ pets with babies- you name it she knew about it!

    I was glad to leave but she stayed after me so sure there were more 'suggestions'!
  • Dinks - hubby's Nana will be exactly like that, I know she will. Hubby won't hear of it though, he doesn't believe me when I say she'll be forceful and opinionated with me!!!

    Bec - all of our relatives, apart from my parents and sister and brother, live at least a 2-3hr journey away and we are definitely NOT offering them a bed for the night. Even if they ask, we have both agreed to say no, I just couldn't deal with it! We do feel guilty, but have to put our little family first!
  • I was quite surprised at Hubby's Nana! The other thing she kept saying was about leaving baby to cry- he is just playing up! Umm no, he is 5 days old and needs something as parents its up to them to find out what!

    What good is it doing having a screaming baby? It makes everyone on edge. I just kept saying no he is 5days old, he is not being difficult!

    We also have the problem of family living 130 miles away. They will want to come up and see us in hospital and I want that too but will they just come for the day or stay in B&B??? Ahhhhhhhhhh its so hard!
  • I'm really glad you are having a no overnight guests rule too, I just really hope we can stick by it! x
  • My MIL is coming to stay a few weeks after the baby is born. If he comes on time he will be 3 weeks old, if he comes as late as he can (2 weeks late) then he will be a week old.

    She lives in Spain and there were some cheap flights. She consulted us both first and asked if she would be okay to stay. I said yes and she booked the flights. At first i was a bit unsure, as having someone in the house such a short time after the birth, 24/7 for a whole week is quite a scary thing. Im not really used to having her stay as she usually stays elsewhere when she comes. I have no objection to her being there at all but would probs appreciate someone not being there all the time.

    I have however tried to look upon it as an advantage. She is very open minded and never tries to tell me what i should/shouldnt be doing in pregnancy. I am hoping that she may have babs when im trying to get my head down and things!

    The only slightly annoying thing is she wants picking up from the airport. She always picks us up when we go to stay with her and it seems unfair not to. But i could potentially have a week old baby and to expect DH to travel an hour and half each way to pick her up, leaving me at home with a newborn upsets me a bit. DH has said we`ll just have to wait and see about picking up and she said, oh well he`ll definately be born by then, but thats not the point, the point is i may not be up to being left with a newborn so close to his birth.

    It is on my mind slightly but for once in my life im trying to think positively about her visit rather than worrying! DH does have a brother who lives an hour away so he may just have to be roped in to do the airport pick up! Only trouble is he is rather unreliable so we`ll just have to wait and see.

    Phew, sorry turned into a mammoth post
    K 26 weeks xx
  • thants nothing my mil, fanatastic as she is has invited herself over a week before due date and is staying the duration until Lacey lump makes an apperence!!!!!!!!!! how on earth do you tell them no???? i just know she will completelty take over but in her way she is only helping!
  • God Chloe123, thats terrible!! You`re right how do you say no??? I must be honest i just couldnt cope with that, id end up putting her in a tent in the garden or sumthing!!
  • very tempting katy!! i really hope lacey comes early and then she wont have to come over for as long!!! its the only way out i can see lol
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