Is anyone else on there own and pregnant?

Replies

• KThom122

  Jan 1, 2008 4:11PM

  I have been in your situation and I can tell you it will get better. Try to be posative tho coz I really believe your baby can feel your emotions and a happy mummy leads to a happy baby (thats my theory anyway).
  
  Don't be getting down thinking you won't be able to cope on your own coz you will- I was 18 and on my own and people say to me now 'how on earth did you cope so young on your own with a baby'- I'm not saying its always easy but its not impossible either and at least you have your mum for support.
  
  Try to find out about local mum and baby groups in your area for when you have lo coz its always good to have support in that way- there may even be one specifically for young mums/single mums which would be even better.
  
  I hope this helps coz I do know that when a break up is fresh you feel a bit raw and emotional and like there is no way forward sometimes but in a few weeks you will wonder why you felt like this and maybe even feel that you are better off this way.

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• chezer

  Jan 1, 2008 6:12PM

  hay i just thought i'd let you know its not that bad, just get through your pregnancy as stress free as you can and you will just flow into motherhood. i was 18 and on my own with noone aqs my mum lioves in spain and i'm an only child. my childs father was a complete waste of space and the little bit of time he did spend with her was stressfull for her but he didn't take long to stop alltogether and she is none the worse for it. she's 10 now and a confident happy go lucky child with manners better than most 2 parent families and becausde of hard work she has never been without. i'm not in any debt i own my own house and i have no man in the world who can take it away.

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• louise0507

  Jan 2, 2008 3:53AM

  I am in the same situation as you except i already have 3 wonderful children.
  I was admitted to hospital yesterday with abdo pains after a really stressful argument when i ended it all forever.
  I find comfort in the fact that whatever struggles we face now me and my kids will be better off without that waste of space . I can't believe i have wasted the last 10 years on him. He is an alcoholic and i think the only thing that stopped him seriously hurting me was the fact that im pregnant.(i am due in 32 days)
  Got to go my kids have started to wake up breakfast to do.
  
  Take care.
  
  louise

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• tashy1

  Jan 2, 2008 6:31AM

  Whenever loosing someone you love. I have learnt that time is a great healer. Just found out my ex of 7 months is having a baby and we are not divorced yet. And it's with a friend. Well what I thought was a friend. This is what he greeted me with yesterday. When we were trying for a baby he couldnt even get to the hospital. And after being in relationship for 3 years. He was getting cold feet before the wedding. Apparently they have been seeing each other for 6 weeks.
  
  And he wants to spend the rest of his life with her. So over time I know things will get better. But for now let me say. Nothing hurts more than feeling unloved...

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• hels_davenport

  Jan 3, 2008 7:01PM

  I'm not on my own with this one, but I was with my first baby and know exactly how you feel; baby's father didn't want to know and put me through hell, but becoming a mum was the most amazing all-consuming experience and all I ever thought about was my baby and because I was on my own our bond is incredibly strong. I did have moments (a lot in fact) where I wished that he had been there for me and we had been a couple bringing up our baby like everybody else (or so it seemed) and I felt really really down sometimes, but I ended up actually really enjoying the fact that I had her all to myself, very selfishly I know. Amazingly things have turned right round and he is a fantastic dad (although we're not together, I'm pregnant by my new partner) but I just wanted you to know that you will get through it, although things appear really bleak right now and you have your lovely baby to look forward to.
  
  Helen x

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• lea43

  Jan 3, 2008 7:50PM

  Hi Mikayla
  I'm not in same situation but I'm sure with the support of friends and family you'll do fine, it's much better to bring a child up yourself than in a relationship that's not working. I think it's a really good idea to join mum and baby groups and have a network of other mums for support. Like others say you'll have your baby all to yourself and I'm sure will have a really special bond.
  xxx

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• wannanother

  Jan 4, 2008 3:44AM

  hi i was on my own with my first child who is 3 now...and i would not have changed it for the world. we have a great relationship and i believe we are closer because it was only ever just the two of us in the first couple years. it can be hard at times, but then there are poeple i know who are with their partners but they end up doing everything anyway, so at least you know where you stand. it doesnt mean your child miss out in any way, and im sure you will cope just fine. it does help to have a mum or someone who can help out if needed, but i managed just fine on my own and to be honest being with him would have made our lives worse and was too stressful and i was upset all the time etc, happy mum =happy baby as they say.
  
  you may be hurting now and feel you cant do it, but you can, believe me, take care x

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• dottie_pottie

  Jan 4, 2008 5:17AM

  Hi,
  I know what you mean about been scared. At least you have your Mum, I dont. She doesnt want to know due to who the father is, currently he doesnt want to know either, which is a good thing for me as he isnt what you would call a stable suitable partner. I have a wounderful big sister and friend who are been great supporters. There are times I cry but when I feel "harry the bump" move I know I will manage. Dont ask me how but I will and so will you.
  Keep your chin up, even if it sometimes means you are putting on a brave face.
  

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