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My good friends sisters baby died today

Hello everyone, just thought id have a moan. My good friends sisters baby died today. I know her well but i knoww her brother better. She was 24+4 & she was due 2 weeks b4 me & now i feel soooooooooooooo guilty because my baby is ok.

My brother knows them aswell & he said that when my baby is born its gona remind her of her 1 & it made me feel worse. I know he is just saying what everyone is thinking but now i cant bring myself to go see her or go to the funeral. She is still in hospital because she hasnt yet delivered the baby. She has lupus so they advised her not to get pg in the 1st place, but to make it this far & lose it is terrible.

ITS SO SAD.:cry:

Replies

  • Hi tess1, I'm so sorry to hear your news! i know how you feel, my cousin and his girlfriend lost their baby at 11 weeks when i was 27 weeks and i felt so guilty for my baby being okay, It shames me to admit i even hid when i spotted her in sainsbury's. it was 6 weeks after the m/c that we met up, and i felt really awkward with my big bump, but she was fine, and wanted to talk about my baby and the one she lost it was a really hard time, but we're fine now! but it must be harder for you what with the close gap in due dates! take care, kayleigh xxx
  • Oh thats the saddest thing ever image it made me cry. x x x i cant imagine how you must feel tess, but you shouldnt feel guilty for your baby being ok, as i said though im not it that situation so i cant really comment on how u must feel x x x
  • i know exactly how you feel, my sister lost her son at 30 weeks 2 days before my daughters 1st birthday, she has lost 5 babies and ive had 2 healthy children. she was meant to be my sons godmother and lost her last one 4 days before his christening, she couldnt face going. its hard when you are so happy, but you shouldnt feel guilty its not your fault and you have your baby to think about. take care.
  • Thanks for ur replies guys, i really appreciate all ur kind words. What i do not understand is how these terrible things keep happening in this day & age & why the hospitals do not do more to prevent such tragedy. I can understand early m/c's as i have had 7 but to get as far as 24+4 & ur sister at 30 weeks & to lose the baby is awful.

    Thanks again & good night*
  • Oh Tess, i had no idea you had any, let alone 7. Get some sleep and im here to chat anytime, even though lately im a miserable cow. Loads of love sophia x x x
  • so sorry to hear your really sad news,keep your chin up,and try and put it to back of your mind!!take care!!
  • Hi Tess
    When I was pg the 1st time a cousin of mine was a month ahead of me with her 1st, when she was 6months pg she had to go through child birth to get the baby out as he was gone, i felt terrible for her & after my 1st DD was born i didnt see my cousin for about a year, and we were always very close. It may take your friends sister a very long time to come to terms with her lose but just be ready if and when she wants to see you & your baby & realise that its not because she wants to stay away but that she may not be able to cope by being close by
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